Missionary Wife Falls

Unfortunately, we are now going to be discussing a friend, a very dear friend, someone so close it was originally thought 20 years ago that she was my wife!  So we put distance between us physically so that assumptions would go away but not mentally.  We have remained in close contact up until a few months ago.

Through the years, her husband became a very good friend as well of mine. He used to own one of the Munich hotspot techno bars!  He was a mess back then - PTSD from what went on the Balkans, too much death.  He was at the site where my cousin Bernard was executed in Bosnia - he told me things which have not even appeared in the Hague trials about what happened.  So yeah, blood brothers.

You might remember my mentioning many years ago about a wife, whom decided against her husband's wishes to go on the mission field and leave him with the kids.  He was a bit outraged, she really did not care less and told me from Chile that she may well not return.

Return she did, in time to have two more children, brought about by a couple's weekend for marriage counseling away.  Okay, I thought it was funny - and true according to him.  She was devasted and wanted to abort them ... and I thought, what has happened to my friend?

So, you know Kris, I confronted her.  It seems in Chile she had become romantically involved.  It wasn't serious, she left him behind, but it was physical.  We prayed together about this and I encouraged her to never return to Chile and only go on mission trips with her husband after this.

All was well for a number of years, but well, last August I got a note from her that she was leaving the church - too much gossip and evil things were being said about her husband.  So, I encouraged the both of them to find another church.  There are plenty of offerings in my little town.

And, silence.  Occasionally, I would get a recipe from her but never any real communication.  The husband was growing increasing upset and at one point was arrested for for hollering at the oldest son.  It was bogus, but it made him wake up and start to evaluate what was going on around him.  Why was he reacting this way?  It was too weird.

Then Thursday, he and I talked on the phone for many hours.  It seems she has been having an affair dating back to August with the same man, it is now out in the open and the husband has been pushed out to make room for this new guy.

I only learned this when I called him, because she had sent me nude pictures of herself.  The first ones were inappropriate, by evening time, they had become quite - uhm, heartbreaking.  My dear Elspeth had broken.  (yes, her real name!)

I as floored!

But, I meditated on this over the weekend.  Warning signs were there:

• her personality change
• willingness to kill her children
• the affair in Chile husband still does not know about
• the stresses of more children
• the stress of a PTSD husband
• the stress of poverty as he lost his job
• the willingness to offer her body, for ... what?

And she crumbled because she had walked away from her faith, the church and her friends.

God gave us friends to help support us, a church to help guide us and a faith built on rock.

Equally, God gave us a task to represent Him and when we fail and fall into sin, He will strip away our blessings.  It is painful to know, to witness, to comfort the casualties ...

I do not know what to do or say.  I can only offer distant statements of shock and sorrow for my vet friend.  She is not really talking still to me, so nothing I can do there.  And perhaps it is best I go away from her life ...

Prayer, lots of prayer.

Poor Dutchman

Poor Dutchman is beside himself.  His youngest son has decided to marry and announced to the world yesterday his choice.  Yeah, another train wreck for his life, as if he has not been beset by enough as it is.

I have never commented much about the details concerning this son because, well, mainly I refuse to allow my mind to sink to such levels.  Let us just say that he has been very troubled for the past nine years.  Both Dutchman and I had sort of fantasized that the youngest son would be interested in and eventually marry my oldest.  Silly parents!  Before he was out of high school, Dutchman came to me and told me that he would not allow his son to even attempt to go on another date with my daughter.  Apparently, he found out how sick his son really was before either I or my daughter did!

And as the years ticked by, that young man was making grosser and grosser mistakes in life.  There are levels of sickness we are talking here so black that the mind has a hard time wrapping itself around the concept of how could someone be that ... broken.  And most of that started when Dutchman was away working in Denmark on a project, which then injured him severely and he was then out of it for a few years recovering.  At least the legalities of what son did, the father was able to finance a way around - with the added cost of expensive attorneys.

It is like Satan staged the perfect attack: father gets sent out on a job for two years, son is lured into sickness, father is injured and loses another two years recovering, son falls further into depravity, father is hurting financially and can not even send son to therapy (actually I am not even sure we knew such a thing existed at the time!), son's mis-behaviors begin to cause problems in his life and spiral him into unemployment and substance abuse, he refuses to talk with his father or even me any longer!  Then he starts to get his head together but by now is living the pagan lifestyle and likes it.  Along comes someone he should never have even met - and now scheduled wedding bells.

I can hope that he will have a great marriage or family or a bright future, but I fear he has willing tried an anchor to his leg and the next time he does a nose dive - well, nothing will raise him from those depths.  And living as a non-Christian, marrying a non-Christian - a secular marriage, he only has a 40% chance of not ending in divorce in the first five years.  Even if he turned himself around and she became a Christian, today's percents are almost as dismal.

She is from South Dakota, so I expect she will be off for there dragging Dutchman's son along behind her, at least until she tires of him.  Twenty-two, four husbands, yeah it is hard to be positive and hope for much other than she is going for another income check.

And, just as easily, this could be my son in a few years ... sigh ...

So for those young men, whom are my readers, consider your choices and actions well.  This young man did not wake up one morning at his Christian school and say, "Gosh, wouldn't it be nice to be addicted to virtually everything and then marry someone because she appeals to my increasing problems?"

No, step by step, choice by choice, you drive a wedge between you and God, sure God can forgive almost everything - but you will wake up one morning and no longer care there even is a God because you crave your next addiction or feel so sorry for what you did and know God never could forgive you - so why try any more?

It is all lies from Satan.  He only has one purpose - to discount your testimony before your friends so they will know you only believe in a lie.  And when he can get you to that point, you are lost, as are all of your friends whom are now following your example.

So, look at your life and consider what it ought to be.  Repent.  Get back into the Word.  Get back into prayer.  Get back into fellowship.

And most importantly - learn to forgive and let go of what drove you away from God in the first place.

Twenty-two And Confused

Now at lunch Monday, I fell into a conversation with this sobbing college student.  For those of you whom know me, crying female plus Kris do not mix.  Actually porcupines and your dog's face are more compatible than me when tears are involved.  But something in me was moved and I made the mistake of asking ...

Short story:

She desperately wants a boyfriend, but also knows it isn’t going to happen.  She is too busy to maintain a good relationship, insists on a solid Christian boy (like they exist!) and doesn’t want to kiss until sure he is really going to be "special" in the long run.  (psst!  how about at the altar?) !

And then this alarm clock is going off inside of her - she HAS to find him!

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah - far too much about her I would not share, TMI! and I hope I can do a mind dump and just lose it once I have written this up.  Interspersed with her above statement were perhaps three gallons of tears in there.  She was in quite a state.

Oh, did I mention that she has made it to 22 and is still a virgin?  Never had a boyfriend, never even held hands - and yes, she is more than most guys have on their list of wanna-be attributes (purely physical), has a brain and knows how to use it too, wants to do what is right by God and in tears over this exact problem!

"There are no guys!  I am going to die a ugly old virgin!"

Suddenly I was happy no creepy old guys were within earshot of that one!

So, was she willing to think, talk and work through - why a guy is so important in her life?

1. There is no one whom meets her requirements, but she still wants him. 

2. Waiting for God to pick out the perfect man, and realizes that is not what the Lord wants for her. 

So we had something to work with, God is not asking her to wait for marriage so she can have sex. He is calling her to stop waiting.  But, she has not been listening to that answer, it is the wrong one!

If God really is all you need to satisfy you, then what was she waiting for?  What is going to be better than Jesus?  She was waiting for a husband, thinking married life would be better than single life; she didn’t really think Jesus alone could be better than Jesus plus a great husband!

And a few verses come to mind:

1 John 4:17

In this love is brought to completion and attains perfection with us ...

Psalm 16

2)  I say to the Lord, “You are my Lord;
    I have no good apart from you.”

5)  The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup;
    you hold my lot. 

8)  I have set the Lord always before me;
    because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken.

9)  Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices;
    my flesh also dwells secure.

11)  You make known to me the path of life;
    in your presence there is fullness of joy;
    at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

So, my challenge, was for her to continue to ask, “Is Jesus really enough? If you never got married, would your soul still be able rejoice in Jesus' love?”

And she was thoughtful.  She realized that indeed she could be satisfied in knowing that her real happiness was in Jesus and His provision for her.  Anything she did, in and of herself, was only going to cause problems and in the long term bring less than satisfactory results.

I walked with heaviness from lunch, for I remember those struggles in my own life and the years it took me to kill what was inside of me and to learn to wait upon the Lord and his provision - not my own.  It is a hard lesson and life without my Faithless Bride is so much better in the long run.

And then I was to slam right into almost the very same conversation again, within the hour!  This time, the conversation is not concluded I believe and I hope by sharing this, what I did say can be better understood by the second party today within the light of what I said on Monday.

Passing On Forgiveness

So you have a heart attack, your heart is completely unstable, your body has been invaded by dozens of needles, you are stressed to the max - and then you get visitors.

Dutchman and I were talking.  I strapped to a table for now 40 hours at this point, he stressed over something he did not want to say but apparently felt compelled to.  It was about my father in law.  I mentioned his death last August.  Just let dead horses lay, really! And though I would not post this, I think I will because perhaps someone out there needs to understand forgiveness as well.

For those whom do not know, I had a civil marriage, which was to have been followed by a religious ceremony several months later.  Yeah, two kids knowing they should tie the knot but wanting to do it right and wait for the real ceremony to take place.  So, civil was in August, religious was to be on Valentines Day the following year. Only father in law found out, as he worked for the government, and exploded while I was in Mexico on a month long trip.  I came back in mid-September to address a problem in his church (at the youth's request) and swung by my best friend Don's apartment, used his hidden key to get in to drop my bags, and instead found my would be bride and him heavily engaged.

I quietly left.

Back home I found I had a letter from her dated a week after I had left for Mexico, telling me that her father had annulled the marriage so she saw no reason not to explore my list of friends she liked.....  Yeah, sure glad I found out before I got that letter!  Of course, her and I had a $220 phone call that afternoon!  I lost a great many friends that fall.  Even Dutchman, the only one to  apologize, fell to her seductive powers.  And as for me, my relationship with Udie had been completely above board.  Silly me, it seems!  But, I was not that kind of person in any event and I never would have thought it of any of my friends!

And here Dutchman, paced in my room, in ICU, as he worked his way through telling something he had never said before, from a conversation with my father in law many years earlier, part of the apology he never passed along.  Now at the time of my disaster with that family, their youngest daughter was head over heels for a guy named Kurt.  It really did not take discernment to know what a POC the guy was, but the family had known him most of his life, really loved him and his family - and I was the intruder.  Yeah, I was smart enough to never saying anything in front of them concerning this creature from the underworld.  But, said demon, understood extremely well that I knew whom and what he really was.  And years later, my in-laws were to discover exactly how miserable a creep he was as well.

And Dutchman was conflicted.  Make no mistake he loves his wife but he remembers too well his relationship with my wife.  It almost killed him to tell me of how the father in law had told him of his own distress at how wrong he and his wife had been about me and Kurt.  They had trusted Kurt, they did not trust me.  They saw no future in computers but Kurt wanted to be a dentist, so they could understand that he had his feet on the ground.  Yet, Kurt went on to poison their daughter, after two children, and live "the life" afterwards.  Yeah, he abandoned the children, my in-laws got to raise them.  Because there was no "proof", no charges were ever filed, but in their town, everyone knows he tried to kill his wife.  She continues to live as a vegetable, at least I think she is still alive.  And then in contrast, there was the German, whom did okay with his career in computers, adopted for four older Russian orphans, continued working with youth for forty years now, etc.  Though they could never accept the idea of "that woman" being in my life, aka Gaelic Girl.

My father in law was proud of me!  But he was conflicted and therefore concerned over his own Christianity.  If he had been so wrong about me, and then Kurt, what else was he wrong about?  Should he have institutionalized his wife, as he had considered early on in their marriage?  (It is a long, horrible story, but she murdered her brother in law, though could not be charged because there never was "proof" she had done it.  Though, she had confessed to me, many years later how she actually had!)  And Dutchman had never told me any of this.  Had he of, I would have flown to be with my father in law, to tell him it was all alright, to pray with him, to let him know I have always loved him!

And so Dutchman, embarrassed and hurting, continued to pace as he spilled his guts over Udie and the words of my father in law.  I think it hurt him to know that it was me and not him, the family finally understood their daughter was to have been with.  He was still hurting from her abandonment of him as she continued on her quest to "know" all of my friends.  Sigh.  He was wanting to know he was forgiven by me, because obviously, he can not forgive himself - even forty years later ...

Though my heart rate is now something like 180 and the alarms are sounding from the nurse's station, I almost had to laugh.  I forgave him even while he was still with my wife four decades earlier!  She was dead to me, the woman I had loved was obviously dead and did not exist any longer, I learned that during my very expensive long distance phone call!  Sure, there is a body with the name of Udie attached to it, but it is not the woman I knew.  And that is what really hurt, no one saw the woman I knew, no actually loved that woman I loved, no one understood her real death, she was just meat in a culture addicted to meat.  Her modelling career fell apart, her life withered and died, and one day in 1983 God told me she finally understood this all and to call for an ambulance in her town, she was committing suicide.  No, she still thinks it a miracle a paramedic kicked in her door, because no one possibly could have known.  She does not understand the power of the Holy Spirit.

And so my almost life long friend, came to his peace in this matter, at the cost of a few thousand heart beats of mine.  He came by last night to visit again, to comment that perhaps GG really does like me, though it would be a hard sell to prove.  But, I was still exhausted and he did not stay long.  So I am hoping he is at peace on this issue. He is my best friend these days, one of the few remaining from the old days.  I hope he has truly come to forgive himself.

So, this post is not so much about what happened to me but the need for those involved to forgive themselves.  A lesson Dutchman is just now learning, a lesson my father in law never understood, a lesson his entire family would do well to learn, actually one most humans should as well.


What was it I wrote to my daughter last fall, following her betrayal of me?
      "The quality of forgiveness, is the quantity by which you have been forgiven ..."

For some it is learning to forgive those whom harm you, for my daughter learning to forgive God for her life, for others learning to forgive themselves.

Forgiveness is needed in this world, Pass It On ...

Lessons Observed

Apparently I never am to understand what happened from her perspective. It is obvious she has terminated our relationship, I am down a daughter, and yet God is still telling me to stand on what I know. Don't you just love opposites, when you are the one caught in the middle?

Outside of this blog, where I voice my thoughts, I am pretty quiet on this whole matter. I do not wish to embarrass her nor get either of us into a: he said - she said situation. She is still very much my daughter in my heart and thus it seems it shall remain.

However, my friends - what are left of them, do know the problem and that is about it. I am pretty sure the only one praying for Kris and a resolution to this situation has been me. I might be the only one that cares, but then that was true eight months ago was well.

My minor heart attack was probably predictable. No one to talk to, too much stress, and prayer my only outlet. Then yesterday, when I was at school, I was called into administration and sent to see the counselor. Yeah, Kris is apparently that obviously in need. So I trooped in, met a nice lady and now what? I could "play" this as I do all things, calculating what my responses are to be and appear normal - or - I can be honest and communicate that I am beyond my ability to deal with this emotion.

It seemed like ten minutes, it was over two hours. Lord how I pity that woman, she sure got an ear full. And her advice? The typical soothing words of the world - I know them all, I was trained in counseling as a part of how to make dysfunctional projects learn how to work together. But, at least she was the first human being in three weeks I could actually talk to about this heartbreak in my life.

As I walked out, having now missed my second class of the day, a single word came to mind, "unhealthy". It was the same word I had penned months ago concerning our relationship - it was unhealthy. But, lacking the experience in dealing with an emotional female, I had no idea how to respond. So, I did what I thought it was she needed, that did not approach any level of sin. If I was not sinning and she was getting whatever it was emotionally she needed for healing, then I had to be on the right track, right? Apparently not. Or perhaps I was right on track and that is what got to her. So, what was unhealthy? An environment where only one person would talk with her, interact with her, love her. I think most human beings would not fair well. This is only a guess, but from her perspective, she found she was in love with a guy old enough to be her grandfather. And, that was fine as far as I was concerned, nothing was ever going to happen. And yet, somewhere between the two situations, she shut down.

Back home, it seemed word had gotten around about my hospital stay over. I had many calls from members of the wedding party back in Ohio. People I barely know called and wished me well. People I expect to never see again. Contrast this with my "friends", oh yeah, the ones whom cut out of my life because I dared to reach out and obey God, as well as, my family and church family - whom express concern but there is no love. Stark contrast. Then Timothy's step father called, whom I have seen maybe three times in my life and barely ever spoken to - to pray with me, over the phone, for healing and a restoration to "health". Yeah that concept again.

I dreamt on Galatians last night in bed. I had been reading it when I passed out from the meds. I do not think I made it past chapter one but it kept rolling over and over in my mind until I saw, what I think happened in her mind. No I am not going to address this with her, I foresaw this on the 24th and posted on it on the 25th (least dear daughter you also think me liar, again), that is why she is staying away. It is enough for me to now know and understand - and God is the one whom will have to address this one with her. It will be a hard road for her to follow to reach where she could be by picking up the phone. But self perspective is hard to fight and one can really foul up ones path by it - cause you can make choices which will make it darn hard to make the right choice later on. But then, we have discussed that one before.

As for me? I think I can step forward now to some level of normality again. Yes, all of my protective walls are back up - I dropped them only for her, I thought I was now free to live without them - but if she is not going to be around, then why let others see whom I really am? I apparently am to continue to work towards the vision she and I shared, though alone for now. Will I continue with youth work? I have set a condition before God if He wants me to continue, no it does not involve my daughter. And I am more certain than ever I will never, ever, reach out to another human being again - as I did with her..... And once again, the happy clown Kris is back, making people laugh and very, very, dead on the inside.

While I Was Away

So I survived my little "bro's" wedding.


God was gracious to provide clouds to block the scorching sun and a moderate breeze to make the event comfortable. There about 120 in attendance.

One of the few weddings I have been to where NO one got in a fight, lost their cool or became dictatorial! It was simply a very pleasant event. Of course, being Timothy's ex-best friend put me in the spot where I got the third degree, singlily, from her entire family! Yeah, everyone wanted the scoop on his divorce five years ago and on what kind of man he is. Like I am going to waste a week of my life, to attend the wedding of someone I really do not like? I thought it an odd situation and rather humorous.

Contrary to my nature, I even cried while the pastor was praying over their marriage. (and again even as I type this! %$@%^$ emotion!) I am so happy for him though. Yet it is bittersweet for me.

The hotel all of us were staying in had NO internet! I had wanted to keep up with my school work and work on my blogs as well with any free time. Oh well, all of the computer nerds watched the scify channel and discussed it over breakfast each morning.

It is good to be back home, though I continue to get almost no sleep - true since June 24th!, when God stunned me with what is to happen, contrary to what was to. So, I continue to pray, though it is in vain I fear. So much of what has happened these past few weeks has been a re-enactment of events of a different kind, a lifetime ago. I struggle to ignore the obvious correlation, I fight in prayer against this. And I am confused. God tells me to stand in place to continue to work towards a future I no longer think possible. But, what if ..... I must still play my part? Now that really would impress even me, to have that much faith in an event so many years from now, alone, and see it come to fruition.

It was with sadness I found she had come home and cleaned her room out while I was gone, leaving a note which basically said, "So long and thanks for all the fish...." (to quote Douglas Adams). I had hoped there would have been another note, hidden from children's eyes that might explain this situation - one to tell how our love went from commitment and trust, to nothing, but as has been the tale for the past three weeks - there was nothing. Just the echo of silence concerning the entire matter.

My heart is broken, I can not even lock away the pain for the first time in my life. I could survive my own chidren's failures, those of my God-children, even friends whom have rejected me because I chose to obey God and reach out to her. But, now I can't. How I hate this emotion that God has inflicted me with! I know it serves a function and perhaps that is its function - to keep her alive in my heart so that she will never be forgotten in prayer..... Or, more likely to break me. And I have to admit a tendency to consider not doing youth work any longer over this.

Last year, I had a nice life. She came into it, robbed me of all of my friends except one, and the respect of another whom had not heard of what had happened. And then she left. My life now fairly shattered, an infant emotion gasping for life, it is like it is 1976 all over again. Alone, basically friendless, humiliated, humbled, hating myself, and trying in earnest to seek a God's face whom seems to slapped me upside the head with a two by four. If I had low self esteem before, I have no idea what you would call what is below that.....

I have worked with teens now for 38 years, seen it all, heard it all, so often repeated - it is frustrating. I may just give up the ministry at this juncture. It is a thought, that might not be so unreasonable. I could use some prayer over the whispering voice, echoing the words of failure to me.

A Wedding!

So, Kris is heading for Ohio!  Well, actually it is somewhere on the Indiana - Ohio border. 

Timothy is getting married in July.  He lives and works in Ohio, twelve feet off of the Indiana border.  The wedding is to take place about 100 yards inside of Indiana from where he lives.  Of course my being there is dependent up on finances.

Yes, Timothy called and asked me to be his best man.  I can hardly say no since I have known him for so long!  But, it was something I struggled with, my going to his wedding when I first heard of it months ago, because he is divorced (which I do not believe in) and his divorce was just about as weird of one as you could have!  His wife left him about six years ago now.  I could understand why she did, I could understand why Timothy could not/would not meet her even half way.  Of course, that little problem he only made worse and she only more insistent.  Palm plant on face!

Personally, as with most of my divorced friends, I pray for their reuniting and their hearts to soften.  Unfortunately, I have yet to see this happen once, but I am a romantic and I know God's will is that you reunite with your (ex-) spouse.  Yeah, there are situations where I do not pray that, especially when the guy is a complete mess and really should have been shot.  Mostly the guys that pull the flight routine.

But, given that Timothy's wife did abandon him, he did want to work out the situation and she refused all counseling, my Bible tells me that remarriage is acceptable.  Not the best, but allowable.  And, God will bless them.

So I have 15 weeks to lose more tonnage (I have lost 18 pounds so far this year!), get my feet healed so I can walk, get over my displeasure with the TSA for two flights, save up some money and get his car fixed!  Yeah, he is going out here for his honeymoon, so I know he is going to want to use that car and it is in major disrepair!  (It was in bad shape when he left for Texas three years ago!)

I wonder if any of my readers are in eastern Ohio, western Indiana.........?

Well, I must close and be off for the local college.  Today I have to do a paper on Technology and its impact on culture (like I really care!).  So hi-ho, hi-ho, its off to the research library I go!

What To Do In This Culture?

So the problem has been stated across the last several posts.  The Bible, our churches and our faith, should have a very black and white view on this entire Marriage, Divorce and Remarriage question.  But, something is missing: Justice.

Under the culture our Bible was written in - sexual sin was met by instant death.  It was ordered and expected to be carried out instantly by the local population!  The fact that Jesus forgave the woman caught in adultery did not mean adultery was okay or forgivable as far as anyone was concerned - the Pharisees He faced had not brought the man.  The Law required both be brought for justice.  The woman to explain if she had cried out for help and if not - both were to die; if she had cried out then just he was to die; assuming she did not want to marry him on the spot - with no hope for a divorce by him ever.  (And people say God does not have a sense of humor....)

Jesus could easily have forgiven both, but that was not the opportunity presented by the faithless Jews that day.

Yeah, a great many people are alive today, remarry and create even bigger messes, whom should have been killed in a just society.  Just in the area of sexual sin alone, which is not even taken seriously any longer, our population would be disseminated.

So, you have a faithless spouse?  They would be dead and you are free to remarry.
You have been abandoned?  You are still free to remarry, once granted a divorce.
Your wife was not a virgin?  Bible says you can divorce - but then take a long hard look at your own heart and your sins first.....
You are playing house before the marriage?  You must marry and may never leave or divorce.

But there were other death sentences which come to mind:

• Insurrectionists
• Blasphemers
• Witches/Magicians/Pharmacologists
• Murderers
• Those Responsible for Accidental Deaths
• Rapists

Yeah, a whole lot of people are marrying and remarrying whom would not even have been alive!  Which of course compounds the problems for everyone in those families and the broken families.

Which is why, we have such a huge need for this culture to turn its men back to God, back to justice and back to the family.  If the Church can not impact the man and turn his heart, then the family will be lost and with it what is left of God's Blessings.

Are you a Christian male, mature in his faith?  Please reach out to other men and begin an accountability group - especially in the area of sexual purity.  We are weak and the lure of the a world of conscience hardened woman is out there wanting to destroy us and our witness.  We have got to not only stand our ground when it comes to sexual purity, we have to take back ground lost within the Church through the sin and pride of others.  That will not be popular nor easy. 

Are you a female?  If you are married may I suggest you sincerely pray for God's protection of your man and your marriage?  If you have not married, may I suggest you aggressively pray for the sexual purity of your future spouse!  And that includes the freely available internet porn which is destroying young men even as you read this.....

Yes, it may well be that the inverse of these are both true, but I will not pretend to be so positive - you may well be however.....  So do it!

(Didn't go where you thought I would did I?)

Adultery

Adultery is so common today it is not even blinked at in my current church!  I have mentioned the barracuda which circles the guys of the church and ever so often manages to snag one, chew him up and then spit him back out.  Cowboy was the latest victim, he now appears to have permanently exited the church.  Embarrassment?  Guilt?  Whatever.  She is back to circling and no one has heard from or seen him.

And in my old church, let us not forget the faithless bride of 2010, her online lover, abandonment of her husband and then remarriage to a guy whom is a picture postcard of what she had just left.....

Of course, in our discussion of Marriage, Divorce and Remarriage - our Bible tells us that adultery plays quite a large part.

Sex before marriage - adultery.
Sex not with your spouse during marriage - adultery.
Divorced and have a fling - adultery.
You divorced or abandoned your spouse and they had a fling - you are guilty of their adultery.
You divorced or abandoned your spouse and they remarry - you are again guilty of their adultery.
You get remarried - you are committing adultery.
Hey guys - porno problem?  That is adultery as well!  Be honest now.

So, we have a superb passage in Malachi 2:10-17, and according to our New Testament, there is a whole lot of adultery going on out there in our 'modern' churches.  Adultery, no matter how you try to justify it, is sin.  But, it is a special sin (I Corinthians 6:15-18).  And, sorry but God will not bless you or His Church if you are in sin.  Period.

Oh, and lest we forget - adulterers (those whom live in and for adultery) will not be found in Heaven.

We are told to exclude those in sin from our congregations but not from our lives - so that they may be brought back into fellowship.

And here is the problem we create for ourselves - we say:

• Well they were not a Christian when the divorce occurred.
• They came to Christ after marriage and so divorce was unavoidable.
• Their spouse left them and lives somewhere else (abandonment).
• They have been married for X number of years and have been faithful.
• They have a family with the new spouse.
• "God" is blessing them.

Each of these statements I have heard numerous times, from pastors in justifying candidates for eldership, even pastoral, in churches I have attended.  Lets see, it is is not really adultery if any of the about 6 items is true?  Adultery, one of God's big hitters and the destruction of marriage - something else He is passionate about - are on a sliding scale of sin values?

If you are truthful with yourself - you have just discovered the real reason Christian families are failing worldwide, why the church has little witness any longer to a world awash in sin, and why there are a whole lot fewer faithful than you might like to believe in your fellowship.

But, there is a problem here that we do need to discuss next time in this line of thought.

Marriage, Divorce, Remarriage

One of the most annoying features I have found at my current church is they have never met a marriage they have not wanted to perform.  I have to wonder why and so have been thinking on marriage, divorce, remarriage, etc.

In the world I grew up in, life was so simple on such matters.  Engagement was taken very seriously.  No one would have even dreamt of asking someone to marry them unless they had the father/uncle/brother/whomever was still alive's permission, a real career, some money stashed away and a pretty strong relationship - that would be 3 to 5 years history already!  For all intents and purposes you were married at that point.  And God help you if you decided to "play" house a little early!  So much for the old myth of the 'loose' European.

Once you were married, that was it.   

Divorce was something those disgusting Americans did on their bases and in the big cities.  You wanted a local divorce, you had better have some hard and fast evidence as to why - and oh by the way, there were almost no conditions they were available under.  Cheating spouse?  Husband will probably kill the wife's lover.  Husband is cheating?  Expect the wife's male relatives to visit the bog one night with him.  Widows are allowed to remarry after all.  There was little sympathy for adulterers.....

Outside of the possible bloodbath that my medieval village lived with, in so far as marriage was concerned, it was pretty close to Biblical.  And quite a few Americans tried to get married in our little church - it was very charming but remarriage was never an option, which is what most were to have been.

Yes, once divorced you had one alternative as far as marriage was concerned - settle your difference and remarry your wife!  How the locals would howl at the reaction of the Americans when they heard that one!  Many a pint was hoisted over tales from the recorder's office......

To stick with a strictly Biblical view of this subject - one is left with a very unpopular belief set when compared with that of the world's view today on marriage, divorce and remarriage.

Marriage was strictly controlled.  You married within your faith, to an approved of spouse, and it was forever.  Bad parental choices and you could suffer that one forever.....  You chose to break tradition and do your own thing?  Well, you were excluded from the family, your friends and your religion.  A funeral would be held for you.  Yeah, God is pretty narrow minded on the subject of marriage - something this generation has forgotten.

Divorce is still a poorly understood one, however the Bible is quite clear on the subject:

• The female was not a virgin on the wedding night.  That is all there ever was.
• We are told that God allowed further divorce due to the hardness of man's heart - and I expect that to be included in the only allowable situation above as well.....  Are you listening guys?

Remarriage was possible under a few conditions:

• A spouse dies. 
• The other spouse's abandonment was the cause of divorce; the other spouse then either remarries or states in writing there is not a rats chance of you ever reconciling with them.
• Your original spouse decides to take you back and has not remarried or shacked up since.

Yet in our generation marriage means very little, no different than just shacking up except you get to have children given the father's name without a whole pile of paperwork.  What a maddening culture our prior generations and Hollywood have left us with!

Just as marriage is openly mocked by most today, so is divorce and remarriage.  You can get a divorce because "they have morning breath".  And you are free to roam off and marry someone far more enticing.....

I should mention that my father married eight times, my American grandmother 5 times.  I am intimately associated with divorce and remarriage and the cost borne by the following generations.

So you are not going to like where this is going.

Application of a Soap Opera

I would not be anything, if not a dolt, if I did not comment that the soap opera unfolding around here has had some impact with me.  When you consider that this tale has involved a runaway bride, jilted husband, online love interest and more than a bit of licentious goings on - it suddenly seems to have a familiar ring to it.  The role I played in that tale was the jilted husband.


Amazing to realize that it has been almost 40 years since I graduated college, did the civil filing for my marriage to the Swedish Model, left for a one month trip around Mexico (my gift to myself for actually making it through school!).  (Under Swiss law you must have a governmental approved marriage, hence civil union, however most Christians opt for the religious ceremony as being the actual point of marriage, even though, you are already legally married.)  Then returning home to find out that my bride-in-waiting (for our religious ceremony) and best friend were hard at it.  Yeah, just a bit of a surprise.

It took me years to get past the betrayal.  But have always been thankful to God I discovered her failings before I was truly stuck.  In time I forgave her, even having lunch with her a few times when she worked for my company.  I figured out that I had truly loved her - or at least the person I had known.  She died in my heart that Saturday morning, but in her faith and eventually, psychologically as well.  The still single - never married, middle aged woman whom exists today, no longer resembles the young woman I loved.  That young woman is long dead (her annulment just nailed the coffin shut).  Then decades later, through an unexpected friendship, I found those memories suddenly awakened and having to deal with them all over again!  Maybe that was my mid-life crisis?  May I not have to go through a year like that again!!!!!  And maybe that was a God thing too.....

As for my ex-best friend, I honestly tried to forgive him - it does take two to tango as they say.  But, I could never trust him again.  He went on to be a big cheese in a computer company in South Africa and on one of his visits - we had it out.  At first he denied everything but then I told him I had made a surprise visit to his apartment for what I had hoped would have been a great weekend, and what I had seen.  He got real quiet.  Even as it was, I could never trust him since he was apparently a liar as well. 

Sorry Don you were the worst brother to have ever existed.  Your divorce and abandonment of your children came as no surprise to those whom knew your true lack of character.

After ex-best friend, she moved on to several of my other friends, probably staying with Dutchman the longest.  I was really pissed off at him.  But, one day I went to his church to have it out and this man whom is about 50% bigger than me in all manner of speaking - just jutted out his jaw and said - "Give it your best shot, I have it coming."  And we both knew I could have shattered that jaw.  But, I had come to conciliate - because God was all over my heart on doing so.  We made our peace and have through the years both had to trust the other with the other's life far too many times to mention!

So, yeah, I see the parallels - one of the reasons I figured God had me involved in this latest tale.  Surprisingly, I find that I do not identify with the abandoned husband though.  I truly do believe that although jilted, he certainly had created a home environment under which even a slave would have revolted!  Nor do I identify with the new husband, she will find no peace with him until he finds the God I and she knows.  RB's parents, like my old-were-to-be in-laws, I can now understand their pain because mine sought me out and we made our peace long ago.  They even made a point of meeting my newly adopted family, once I had them back from Russia.  Though even at the time I knew it was causing them pain because they long so for grandchildren.  Whom would have ever thought, 40 years ago, that they too would learn to suffer for their part in SM's annulment of our civil union.  Yes, I forgave them as well, long ago, at their request, in my church at that time.  And, was that ever uncomfortable.

Today, such as when I have a high fever, my worst nightmare continues to be the thought of SM coming back into my life.  Amazing at how the mind works and what one learns to fear.....

Jesus Is The Focus

Continuing thoughts on John 8:1-11.  Last week I shared how the local pastor smacked down the congregation for their judgement and condemnation of last year's Runaway Bride, whom was visiting me and is now in hiding.

His idea was that when "sinners" cross our path we are to be like Jesus was with the woman "caught in adultery".

1.  Make your life about pardon, not punishment!
When you fail, do you need punishment or pardon - not only from God but your peers as well?
Do not seek to condemn others, treat everyone as persons and not pawns to make yourself appear or feel better!
Take the attention off of those in sin, focus yourself and them on the cross.

2.  Point to the cross!
Jesus went to the cross for a reason - our sins separating us from God.  His death bought our forgiveness and completed the promise (covenant) made between Abraham and God - oh so long ago!

3.  Be a safe place for sinners!
The wages of sin is death.  It is not a time out, a broken down car or a tooth cavity!
We each deserve death for our willingness to sin.
Just as you have found forgiveness in Jesus - show those in sin the way to the cross!


In my dealings with RB, I have been on my guard to not condemn her for what she has done.  She knows she has failed mightily - herself, her family, her husband, her faith.  She fears the same may hold true for her new husband and his family.  Her separation from her family is more or less a given.  My place is to continue to love her, even in her sin and show her once again Jesus and the cross.

And of interest was her parents being at this church this morning.  She obviously in shock, but her parents' faces told me the message - their daughter was forgiven and very much loved.  I should also mention that the parents brought first husband with them!

So I close this tale with the knowledge her family is reconciled, she is returning with her parents to reunite with her current husband and Tuesday will probably be the last I see of her.  Equally as important in this story, she and her abandoned husband have come to terms of some sort.  Probably as much for her mental health as his.  But, no he was not seated with them.

Praise God from whom all blessings flow.....

Throwing Stones

So, to continue the story:

Runaway Bride has been at my church several times.  With me on my visits over here in 2010, before she suddenly left for Ohio, and for the past two weeks.  Just her presence has created quite a scandal!  And how people love to talk!

Of course, GOSSIP is wrong in the first place and thoroughly condemned by Paul!  And thinking on it, most of the problems I have found in ALL churches I have attended is the problem of gossip and the other is tolerating open sin in the Body.  But, these we will ignore at this time.....

Since I am not a part of the "In Crowd", I am not privy to most of what goes on.  Certainly, I have been aware of RB's discomfort at Church, which I wrote off as being her discomfort with her own situation.  But, I could be wrong.

It seems that there has been quite an uproar at her reappearance, and with me!, by those whom are ignorant of almost any knowledge.  And the pastor opened up Sunday morning with a shotgun blast into the congregation, then moved on to smack those still left standing!  Wow.

From John 8:1-11, has now spurred the hanging of a sign which reads: "This Is A No Rock Throwing Zone / Policy Strictly Enforced!".  And as for the shotgun blast:

1.  Treat All People As Persons, Not Pawns!
Pawns are viewed as being expendable and of little value.  People are important enough that Jesus chose to die for them.  You are a Person, just like those seated next to you!

This woman, caught in adultery and brought before Jesus, was being used as nothing more than a pawn to get to Jesus.  Those gathered had already broken the Law by not bringing forward the man whom had been with this woman.  She was just a pawn in their game.

We must treat people the way God does, as Persons.

2.  Put Down Your Stones!
We do not have to be the ones throwing stones!  We can choose not to, especially in light of others whom are more than willing to throw them at us!  Even if others are gathering stones, we DO NOT have to.....!

*****

Oh yeah, RB fled! and I have not seen her since 10 am Sunday morning.  She knew the sermon was a whack at those gossiping about her - but she also knew that the passage was about her as well.

So, been trying to find where she is now hiding, in hopes of continuing to be able to reach out to her.....

Taking Sides In A Soap Opera

I have probably never been so disappointed in another human being than I am right now feeling towards Timothy.  I have learned a great deal from the Runaway Bride about what all went on, which has brought her to where she is today.  And it seems Timothy bears more than just a bit of blame.

I still am not sure as to why RB is here, other than she is an emotional and mental mess.  What I can say for her new husband is that he is almost a spitting image of husband number one, whom is now also a friend of hers on FaceBook - my kids tell me.  Don't worry, it gets more confusing as we go along!

Now, Timothy back in 2009 had been living with RB and her first husband for some period of time.  Probably not a great idea, since they were still newlyweds and needed some space in which to define themselves as a couple.  He told me he was in Oregon back then.....  So weirdness number 1 (he lied to me, why?).  At some point in early 2010 he crossed swords with the husband and had to leave or was thrown out - weirdness number 2, as I can get no definition as to what went on.

This now brings us to my first knowledge of this - when she called me and told me what was up in 2010 and asked what to do.  She had planned a trip with her mother to Israel so I told her to see if a little separation could help the two of them get their lives back in order (that would be the month apart I am thinking!).  Timothy now gets her father, goes back and moves her out of the apartment, apparently with no one telling husband this was coming.  So he was a bit blindsided.  But, my father died and I was then in Colorado and very busy so could not catchup with what was going on.  She came to Wenatchee, after Israel, as coincidentally did Timothy, and I was still in Colorado dealing with father's financial disaster!

So in steps Timothy, whom now convinces her to divorce her husband, then funds her divorce in May, picks her up at my home in Wenatchee and takes her to Ohio to deliver her to internet love interest.  You might remember my outrage back then!  Then Timothy moves to Indiana and I knew we had a problem - I just did not know how large of one!

So, it seems that Timothy, somehow in his mind. decided he was the perfect one for RB and quietly seems to have orchestrated this entire SOAP OPERA in order to have RB (whom is young enough to be his daughter) for himself!  And in March was given the heave-ho by RB because she figured this all out!  Yeah, no one likes being used.  So, she married internet love interest (probably to permanently keep Timothy away) and now I think is regretting it.  DUH!

Now how to get her to understand that God takes marriage very seriously and she really needs to get her spiritual house in order - while at the same time not alienating her.....?

Timothy's Sin has beget Sin now in RB's life, and I must believe in first husband's life as well.  I greatly fear for Timothy as God takes a mighty dim view of what he has done.  For what I know of Timothy, God will have to plan a smack down in order to get Timothy's attention.  I guess that will be the point at which a teaching moment will occur and I will have to be prepared.

Scripturally, Timothy is toast - guilty not only of his own adultery - but RB's and her ex-husband's!, RB is toast because she knows her Bible and is in adultery, and first husband is now free to marry since his runaway bride has now remarried.  For him I pray the best, he is still a young Christian still attending church and still in a relationship with RB's family.  Probably just glad he found out what his wife was like early in their marriage.....  (Okay, so I can relate with him because I had a runaway bride in my life as well!)

But my goal in all of this is to get that young lady to get her head on straight!  And maybe not like the situation she is in but understand that for better or worse she is going to have to live with less than she had before.

Oh, but dear reader, the saga is far from over as now my church has found itself drawn into this controversy - as I will tell you about next time.....

Missionary Girl Weds!

No, it was not Italian Missionary Girl, whom is now in Columbia, SC.  And, actually, I do expect her to be wed long before she hits the mission field again.....  Yeah, she is now a virtual daughter and I worry over such things for her.  Luckily, she stays in daily contact - sometimes hourly!  Letting me know where she is and what she is up to.  :^)

So, whom got married?  Well, anyone remember the African Missionary whom I found on the internet?  I first learned about her when she was in Mexico and kept up with her as she blossomed into a full time missionary to Africa.  This was when I introduced Kim to you and I really do hope that more that a few of you were able to help her with her ministry finances.  She did somethings I never would have even thought of - in sharing the Gospel with children.  I am in awe of our God and His use of her.

So, for now she is retired from the mission field and has married a man whom I am sure is not good enough for her.  LOL, I sound just like her father!  Okay, so I was invited and I do like to attend weddings!

Hence, I though I would share a picture with you of her very small wedding, with a HUGE wedding party!  In attendence were co-workers from her missions in Uganda and the Sudan, some whom dated back to her Mexico work, etc.  It was cool to finally get to meet them, I have read about them on her sites, now in person.  I had a great time and think it must have been around 1 AM when everyone retired.

Such fun!

All Her Buttons

Rolling the clock back to 1973, this was when Dutchman, Swede and I first all met one another through a Christian college group.  At first only Dutchman was a Christian but Swede and I followed along shortly after joining the group.  As I have mentioned in the past, the change was so abrupt and obvious in my life that the church we all went to made me their high school group's youth pastor!  (bad idea! i was way too young!)

Now, one of the girls in that first youth group of mine was to grow into International Banker Girl, whom I told you about perhaps two years ago when Dutchman flew her over for his birthday and sure stunned the two us!  (what a joyous reunion!)  Back in 1973, she was just an awkward teenage girl, certainly nothing like the accomplished self confident woman she is today.  And she had a problem back then - an older brother whom both Dutchman and I classified as a sexual preditor - and history was to prove us correct.

So, we would tag team trying to keep her safe while her parents were not around and more than a few times had to trash said older brother (once within an inch of his life!).  But, apparently he never learned and the justice system was the one whom eventually had to deal with him.  Hence, she viewed us sort of as something between older brothers or pseudo father material or maybe shining knights.

Fast forward to this past weekend and you can better understand the context of this tale.

It is nine a.m. on Saturday, the gun show had just opened and Dutchman gets a call on his cell phone.  Sort of odd, as everyone knew he would be at the show and could not really talk.  IBG is screaming on the phone so loud that not only could I hear every word but so could some guys on the aisle behind us!  (Dutchman is going deaf, but you never mention that topic - gees!)

In summary, her husband and her had a fight ending with him storming out of the house.  Just before calling, she had gone online to pay some bills and discovered there was NO money in her accounts and all of her credit and cash cards were missing!

Dutchman and I mused over this for about an hour without coming to a conclusion  It really did not sound like something her husband would do.  But, then again, he recently had been told that he is going blind - so could he have gone insane or been so foolish to as to decide to go on a trip to Vegas or something equally as stupid?  About an hour later, he walks up to our table and sheepishly says hi.

So for the next hour we hear the real tale, from his viewpoint anyways.

He had thrown his back out the night before and had taken a big pain killer.  He was in so much pain and fell asleep so fast that he forgot to put 'HIS' dog in its kennel for the night.  About five in the morning, the dog pees on the carpet at the foot of the bed, and an irate IBG wakes him up to clean up the mess.  But, he is so tired that he only throws a towel over it and goes back to bed.  A few hours later was the fight, which began over his not shampooing the carpeting at 5:00.  She storms out of the room, he cleans out her wallet to make a point and takes off.

Now his father is with him through this conversation, standing there with his mouth hanging open most of the time and saying things like, "You said what!" "You did what!" and my favorite, "Are you insane?"

They amble off and Dutchmen and I are simply stunned - to the point of having NO response.

A few hours later, he comes back.  "I really screwed up, didn't I?"

We agreed.

"What do you think it will take to get her over this?"

Dutchman went with flowers, I went with the most expensive chocolate he could find and flowers too!  And he trundled off muttering at how it was unfair he should have to buy her flowers and chocolates really were not her thing.......

Dutchman and I both smacked our foreheads.

So, Saturday night, I call up Gaelic Girl and told her about this whole incident, which had become a running gag at the gun show in our table area.  So I said, "Now I probably know you better than anyone alive and let us say that one day I decide I am going to push all of your buttons at once - what would it take to make up for this?  Flowers? Chocolates? Cash if I sold all of my guns?  What?"

There was a long silence.  "Flowers, chocolates and you better save one gun and a bullet because I will still kill you!"

Next morning, 9:00 another call on Dutchman's cell.  This time it is her parents calling to get Dutchman to please talk with their daughter and the husband because she had called them and was all hysterical over him not coming back home last night.

Dutchman explained the previous day's conversations and at how neither were looking objectively at the situation and how they are adults and do need to work this out on their own.  It was hysterical.

But then the truth sort of worked its way out: husband had come back the night before but had not brought flowers or chocolates, just handed her an envelope with the contents of her bank accounts.

She slammed the door in his face and he spent the night at his dad's.

And, strangely enough GG is now not talking to me either because I would even think of pushing all of her buttons on purpose!

Barracuda

Back in the college days, we had quite a group that would hang out together to study.  Not like any of us were in the same class, but it seems easier to study with other humans around, rather than locked in your own dorm!

Now, we all had nicknames, and one of the girls we had named Barracuda.  You see Barracuda, in real life, just sort of swim along checking out the menu items.  When they spot something tasty, they will do a drive by, spin and watch to see what happens.  Nothing? Then it makes a head long run in for the kill.

That was how Kathy was, all Barracuda.  Spot guy, zoom in for a quick chat and then "disappear" to watch.  If all looked good - zoom!  Poor guy never saw it coming.

Now back before Christmas I had spotted what appeared to be a barracuda at church.  Sort of a quiet one, single, divorce and Christian was about all anyone knew about her.  She was mingling, but her eyes were searching.  They lit upon a guy in our congregation whom is a real life cowboy.  Now in his middle aged years, and married I might add, she zoomed in for the drive by.  Apparently, she liked what she saw, because when I came back from vacation, they are now close friends.

I know he is married, I am sure others know he is married, I can't believe the gossips in the church did not tell her he was - and yet .......?  Conversely, I wonder if he is flattered to have a younger woman's attention?  From what I know of him, he never struck me as the type to give a female much attention.  Knows his horse and not much else.

Guess it is those quiet ones you have to worry about......

Bundling

Sunday, after church, a bunch of us went out to lunch and had an interesting conversation - where one of the men commented he had been to Switzerland once and really did not like the hotels.  Of course, I had to ask why, and he commented that there were boards down the center of the beds!

 Ah, you were in one of the Roman Catholic areas, I commented.  So, I explained what I knew of "modesty boards", which apparently was the wrong expression on my part - as I was unaware of the term "bundling board".

From there, the conversation became quite laughable and I will not attempt to repeat what had most of the restaurant in tears.  Let us just say that my trying to figure out how modesty equals bundling just did not go well, for me ....

It's said that the precedent for bundling came from the biblical story of Ruth and Boaz, in which Ruth, a young widow, and Boaz, a wealthy landowner, spend a night together on a threshing room floor and go on to become husband and wife.  Of course, they must have had greater self control than we have today, so now we need a bundling board in order to assure a girls honor.  The assumption being that there will be sleepovers!

Bundling, or bed courting, as it was also known as, was introduced to the American colonies by the early flood of European immigrants.  Doubtless, the cold, damp nights of their northern homelands contributed to its popularity.  Bundling under the covers might even have pandered to a certain Scottish thriftiness concerning winter heating bills, as an eighteenth-century ditty goes:

"Since in a bed a man and maid,
May bundle and be chaste,
It does no good to burn out wood,
It is just needless waste."

(Yeah well, I guess my sitting in the room with them, with my shotgun trained on said young man, might be considered a waste too!)

One bishop at the time is documented as having congratulated the devil for promoting bundling because it was "the smartest thing he's done since he put the snake in the garden."  For today's parents, the idea of bundling takes some adjustment.  Mom and Dad may be okay with sleepovers, but bundling adds a dimension this father would not approve of at all!

So in closing, may I share an expression from my youth, "May your board have a knot....."  Yeah, no one at Sunday's lunch got that one either but it was a knee slapper back home.

Well between the intricacies of early American dating rituals and humor, it seems that Swiss boy is not totally Americanized yet.  :^)

Spook's Aftermath

Much of what I now believe about the relation of God to the believer, the world to the believer and Satan's capabilities was molded directly by what happened to Spook.  I personally witnessed God use the strangest of circumstances to bring Spook and me together, provide for witnessing opportunities and the turning of him, his family and local neighbors all to God.  Then I saw the havoc Satan can sow into a new believer's life.  It was not pretty but God's Spirit strengthened those whom would be strengthened.

Spook licked his wounds for a few years, met a very nice retiree, remarried, bought a place on a beautiful bay, retired and now builds handcrafted cedar boxes for blankets his wife makes and sells.  They are I heard from them very happy.

Of Spook's boys, one went to prison, one went to college and one does manual labor to get by.  Very sad and I do hope they can return to where they were in their relationship with God.

Spook's wife, however, I could write a book on.  As, of all of them, she kept in touch the most with me.  You see, drug dealing boyfriend only lasted about a year before he was caught and sent to life in prison.  She got herself off of drugs, got herself back together with God and then the effect of all of those years of cocaine caught up with her and she suffered a grand mal seizure.  Lost from her mind were all of the years from the point she discovered drugs to the day she was released from the sanitarium.  Yeah, no memories at all.  And also no ability to live an unsupported life.  So, her youngest son, the one whom does labor, is caring for her.  And, yes, she is now getting herself back to where she should have been with God.

In all, a tragic tale I could give of what happens to believers in a Godless society.  However, a wonderful tale at how God moved to turn one man to him, then his family and then his village.

Over this past weekend, I heard from Spook's new wife, after 11 years of silence from them.  How strange I thought, here I was writing about them - and then I hear from them!  Now how is that for coincidence?  Yeah, no coincidence there at all.

Thank you God.....

Awkward

So, I am walking from one building to the other at my church when I encounter one of the young women I have gotten to know, due to her situation - a matter of great prayer I have not shared with you due to the gossip potential.

"Hey!  So how are you doing?"

She gives me a big hug, stiffens then exclaims, "Oh my God!  Uhm, suddenly everything is very complicated!"  And runs for the women's toilet.

Huh!  So, I wander in and find a seat, wondering if maybe she got herself a case of el tourista somewhere.  And then I see what she must have seen - her ex-husband and her father walking into the sanctuary.....  Yup, this is going to be one awkward day for that young lady.

A few minutes later, the mother unit comes storming into the sanctuary with a firm grip on her daughter's arm and slams said daughter in the pew next to her ex.  Yeah, I do not think the parents quite agree with the daughter on the subject of her divorce.

Soon, I see her little sister join them, placing herself delicately between older sister and the ex.  This is in turn copied by her little brother.  Ahhhhh, such nice siblings!

Yup, I will bet lunch was a killer this afternoon.....