Poor Dutchman

Poor Dutchman is beside himself.  His youngest son has decided to marry and announced to the world yesterday his choice.  Yeah, another train wreck for his life, as if he has not been beset by enough as it is.

I have never commented much about the details concerning this son because, well, mainly I refuse to allow my mind to sink to such levels.  Let us just say that he has been very troubled for the past nine years.  Both Dutchman and I had sort of fantasized that the youngest son would be interested in and eventually marry my oldest.  Silly parents!  Before he was out of high school, Dutchman came to me and told me that he would not allow his son to even attempt to go on another date with my daughter.  Apparently, he found out how sick his son really was before either I or my daughter did!

And as the years ticked by, that young man was making grosser and grosser mistakes in life.  There are levels of sickness we are talking here so black that the mind has a hard time wrapping itself around the concept of how could someone be that ... broken.  And most of that started when Dutchman was away working in Denmark on a project, which then injured him severely and he was then out of it for a few years recovering.  At least the legalities of what son did, the father was able to finance a way around - with the added cost of expensive attorneys.

It is like Satan staged the perfect attack: father gets sent out on a job for two years, son is lured into sickness, father is injured and loses another two years recovering, son falls further into depravity, father is hurting financially and can not even send son to therapy (actually I am not even sure we knew such a thing existed at the time!), son's mis-behaviors begin to cause problems in his life and spiral him into unemployment and substance abuse, he refuses to talk with his father or even me any longer!  Then he starts to get his head together but by now is living the pagan lifestyle and likes it.  Along comes someone he should never have even met - and now scheduled wedding bells.

I can hope that he will have a great marriage or family or a bright future, but I fear he has willing tried an anchor to his leg and the next time he does a nose dive - well, nothing will raise him from those depths.  And living as a non-Christian, marrying a non-Christian - a secular marriage, he only has a 40% chance of not ending in divorce in the first five years.  Even if he turned himself around and she became a Christian, today's percents are almost as dismal.

She is from South Dakota, so I expect she will be off for there dragging Dutchman's son along behind her, at least until she tires of him.  Twenty-two, four husbands, yeah it is hard to be positive and hope for much other than she is going for another income check.

And, just as easily, this could be my son in a few years ... sigh ...

So for those young men, whom are my readers, consider your choices and actions well.  This young man did not wake up one morning at his Christian school and say, "Gosh, wouldn't it be nice to be addicted to virtually everything and then marry someone because she appeals to my increasing problems?"

No, step by step, choice by choice, you drive a wedge between you and God, sure God can forgive almost everything - but you will wake up one morning and no longer care there even is a God because you crave your next addiction or feel so sorry for what you did and know God never could forgive you - so why try any more?

It is all lies from Satan.  He only has one purpose - to discount your testimony before your friends so they will know you only believe in a lie.  And when he can get you to that point, you are lost, as are all of your friends whom are now following your example.

So, look at your life and consider what it ought to be.  Repent.  Get back into the Word.  Get back into prayer.  Get back into fellowship.

And most importantly - learn to forgive and let go of what drove you away from God in the first place.