Fleeces, Faith and Hope

I have thought a great deal on the topic of hope this year.

I entered this year knowing I had no hope, life as far as I was aware was over for me and cursed with a bum leg would never be able to take that walk to Argentina to even escape myself much less this environment.  But, even dying on the road in Oregon is far better than the continued abuse I am taking (especially if I count in being completely ignored as even a human being!).

No hope, as I said ...

Except, for the hope that God fills me with - that I will be avenged, I will be justified, I will be used by Him, for His purposes.  And no, I do not understand the connection between His purpose and what all goes on around me.  It is one of those wait and see kind of things.  I do know my solution to all, but I have to be assured of His solution, if His perfection is to be attained.

Then my friend lost their hope.  Life had turned on them.  It was over.  And I understood all too well.  And I have thought months on this, the question of hope, faith and miracle quietly clicking away behind my regular stream of thought ...

I have to turn the clock back to 1974 and the birth of my first understanding of hope and faith.  I was reading in Judges 6 and 7, about Gideon and how he pared down his army from 32,000 to only 300 - to stand against the Midianites.  Of course, like any thinking man, he turned to God and set a "fleece" before the Lord to confirm that what God told him was true, real, and not a bad pizza the night before.  Judges 6:36 begins the tale of the fleece.

Gideon set two fleeces and both were miraculously answered.

And I thought on this.  I tried it, fleeces worked.  I shared this my College Study group and they were amazed someone had done this!  (I mean really, do people just read the Bible and not think, "Hmmm, I ought to try that ..." ?)

Dutchman and Swede were having a bitter fight over Sister Becka.  Each wanted her for themselves, and I only incurred both their wrath's because I told them she was not a piece of meat up for ownership!  Yeah even as a teen I was a feminist supporter, it was how I was raised in European schools and by my ancient great-uncle ...  So, one Sunday, Swede is driving from Tacoma, where I went to school, to church up in Kent.  He gets to telling me that he can hardly wait to get to church because he had laid a fleece that Becka was to be his unless Dutchman wore an orange shirt, green pants and a green dotted tie to Sunday  School!

I burst out laughing.

I had to explain to him that Dutchman did not own any clothing like that at all!  So, the fleece never could occur.  Swede commented that he believed in miracles and God could make it happen.  So, I had to ask him if he thought that God allows for free will or not?  Of course He does and that was what was wrong with this fleece, it made no allowance for Dutchman to be anything other than a robot before God, in order for Swede to have an answer to his fleece.

Swede slammed on the brakes and ordered me out of his car.  I was still about six miles from the church and would now miss Sunday School.  Swede stomped on the gas and was gone in a haze of blue smoke.

So, I am walking along the freeway to reach the next exit and a car immediately pulls up and stops behind me - it was one of the women in the college group!  She gave me a ride all the time howling at the story I told her.  We even passed the slow moving Swede!  And I learned an important lesson from her that morning:

Fleeces do not allow for faith in our walk before the Lord, they allow for superstition ...

Yeah, made more than just a little sense.  I could see how even I had become a little superstitious across the year and I had a girlfriend to prove it.  She made no sense in my life, but I asked God for ten - four leaf clovers to confirm that her advances on me were of Him, and I did find them, but I had no real peace.  Yeah, I kept the girlfriend just in case.  And like most women, they find out what a nerd I really am and poof!, they are gone.

Of course, Dutchman wore his usual brown tweed suit, as he ALWAYS did to church.  Swede jumped up and bolted from the room!  I never told anyone why other than the lady whom gave me a ride.

Yeah, occasionally I still use a fleece, small ones when I am struggling and I can not depend upon my mind to interpret what is going on around me.  More on that later.

So, just shy of forty years ago, I walked away from fleeces and trying to observe faith - that whole faith unto faith leading.  Where you start out with just the faith you have at conversion and God gives you a little more to meet the issue at hand and your faith grows.  God continues to feed your faith until one day, hopefully, you know that you will be able to move mountains!  Yeah, well that is sort of the goal I guess - the hope in what can not be seen or can be logically known.

Hope?  How hard to understand!  Faith, without no emotion, I could slightly get.  God promises a bunch of stuff.  I used fleeces as my crutch to know what was of Him or in the plans for me - until I hit the Becka fight and a verse about there being "a wicked and vile generation which seeks after signs".  Oh, the self condemnation over that one!

And I struggled with hope.  I had no hope, other than my only hope is in Jesus to cover my sin from God's eyes, I honestly today believe that hope is not even possible without emotion.  I could hope for a bunch of things but logically I knew that statistically they were impossibilities.

Then today, it dawned on me, faith and hope are interconnected!  I can Hope for say something unattainable and if it is in God's Will, it will come to pass and I have to be able to stay the course in Faith!  God's will, will be accomplished with or without my faith - it is His will not mine.  But, if I knew, if I had reason to suspect, then I would need hope and faith to make it to the goal - to His prize, whatever it might be.

So, this is just an introduction to the idea.  Tomorrow the entire idea of helping others to have hope ...

Last Rites

This is a photo I clipped last year because I thought it was a touching, though I had no clue what to do with it.

It was taken during one of the many Venezuelan civil unrests.  In it is Naval Chaplin Luis Padilla, intervening to administer the last rites for a dying soldier just shot by a sniper.  I would like you to notice a few things about this photo:  Padilla is not there in his military capacity, he is there for a wounded man; he is not flanked by soldiers, he is unarmed and quite alone; the dying man is clutching him.

Luis Padilla has it right.

Just like this Chaplin, we are to be of the same material as him, to this world.  We are supposed to be strangers in a strange land, we supposed to be ambassadors for God's kingdom to a world which does not know him,  we are supposed to be at war with the spirit of this age.  But, pretty much, we want to be friends with the world, compromised by this world, as ineffectual as possible in serving God - completely hampered by ourselves and nothing else.  (Yes, speaking about me as well here!)

Padilla has placed his life at risk, to do his duty to God, towards a man in need.  Perhaps this is one of his parishioners, perhaps a complete stranger.  Does not really matter.  No matter whom he is, we are to render what we are able to do for this man about to meet his Creator - including letting him know what we know about God's saving grace.

Like the parable of the Good Samaritan, we are to do what we can, when we see the opportunity to act on God's behalf in this world.  For Padilla, it was exposing himself to taking a bullet to the back to comfort this man at that time of his death.  A week ago for me, it was making myself completely and totally vulnerable for an ex-friend.  For you ...  What is it that you can do to reach out to those whom surround you in this world?  Not because you have anything to gain but because you need to represent God to that person in their time of need?

Our goal in life is to be that representative for God.  Not to accumulate wealth we bury, not to tithe to send others to do OUR job in this world, not to even cluck our tongues at what we see and "know" is wrong.  We are to be active in this world, in our communities, in our friends lives, in our families - representing God's LOVE and His TRUTH.  If you have a mind to, God will use you, as you make yourself available to Him, to serve others.

Life or Death

You know, when you wake up in the morning you pretty much have no idea where life is going to take you, what opportunities God will provide, or what path through the day you will travel.  But, if you are willing and able, you could be led almost anywhere - even where you least expect to be found ...

Last week was simply awful.

I had a friend hurting and there seemed to be nothing I could do right in reaching out to them - throughout the whole of the week!  It ended with my being unfriended on Thursday.  I was devastated and posted my open position on Friday for a new best friend.  Perhaps it was a bit tongue in cheek, I was hurting and in a cruel joke on me - it was humorous to think anyone could ever consider being my friend.  This was the last active friend in my life.  It was only with the greatest of prayer I agreed to meet with my recently lost best friend on Saturday morning.  I had prayed bunches before hand, I thought I knew what to say, but Saturday was not much better than Thursday had been ...

Well, it did not go as planned and I ended up driving home in tears for my friend.  I could not understand, everything was upside down and backwards.  Nothing got through.  I had  no clue what they were going to do, what God was going to do with them, I was without a clue - this was so far from what I am familiar with.  And friendless, I went home in a state of shock.

Many hours later I got a call from them and they were hysterical.  I had received such a call like that once, in 1975, from two of my high schoolers.  Confused, at the end of themselves, unable to even articulate a complete sentence.  I thought they were drunk, it was graduation night and 2:00 AM.  Their bodies were found the next morning.  And I was utterly devastated and completely clueless.  But, that phone call has remained in my active memory through all of these years.

And here again, the exact same words, the exact same confusion, the exact same desperation being confessed.  Getting an address, after numerous tries, I flew to my old friend!  No, not because I had anything to offer or gain, they had already rejected everything me - but because they were a part of my life and even if not still a friend, their life is far too important to be trifled with!

No, I was not their first choice to call.
No, I was not even their second choice.
They ran out of anyone they could think of they needed to call.
No, I am not the perfect one for such a task.
Just the only one to rush to their side.

And I prayed the entire way there that God could kill all traces of the old me and let only the new creation communicate whatever was needed.  I know the old me to be too cold, when friendship, honesty and sincerity were going to be needed.  No memory of the recent past could exist between us.

It took many hours to stabilize my friend emotionally, then mentally and finally spiritually.  From desiring death to showing them there is hope, there is a reason to live, their life was not over - only Satan's hold over them was and the need to always remain so.

No, no more details than that are needed.  Enough to just share that God used me in a big way on Saturday and helping to rebuild my friend ever since - step by tiny step.  They are doing well, full of questions, full of fears, full of tears, but handling each day and letting me know instantly a prayer concern or question.  God is so awesome when you can see Him in action!  I am humbled.

And so, you would think Kris would now be a hero - at least amongst those whom knew what was going on, on Saturday.  Nope.  My children whom I had praying through this, were interestingly disinterested to learn all was well.  Really?  The people of my church's prayer chain just asked if intervention had been successful and commented that, that one could now be scratched off the list.  Really? Gaelic Girl was in full war regalia from Saturday through today.  And I got dumped on Wednesday night by her.  On the one hand I am evil and on the other, oh yeah, I am still evil and  how come God keeps using me without permission.  Really?  And of course, I had to hear from GG's therapist, whom wondered at how I could seem to "know" how to help people and yet be so completely clueless concerning GG.  Really?

Is human life, any human life, so without value that there can not be a celebration of joy when one is rescued?  Really?
Is there some inane characteristic within the Christian body that must correlate unrelated events to prove you evil, or themselves not evil?  Really?
Is there some misunderstanding that when a person its bottom that there is a long term critical need for prayer?  Really?

For my friend: prayer in all aspects of life as they are slowly returned back to where they need to be, an involved church found (and in Seattle?  But it has to exist!), a good Bible Study found, prayer warriors are needed to run interference for them as they grow in strength and faith.  Think back to your own struggles as a new Christian - and just imagine that your birth was at the point literally of death - that is how much prayer is needed by you for them!  And, Satan is not done with the attack, I have no doubts that even now he is formulating how to call them back over to his side ... it will be tempting, it must appear to be what is desired, it must appear to be an answer from God, but it will be a lie and will predate whom they are today.  Yeah, lots of prayer because the fight is not over.

Thank you.

Perhaps we truly are living in the very last days when the hearts of the many, have turned cold and love - even compassion -  is no longer a commodity shared between humans ...

A Life Worth Living

Those whom know me are often the first to criticize me.  And in that criticism is a common theme of I am very slow to get a clue - take a hint - are you a stalker?  And realize that most everyone in my life has at one time or another taken the tact of seeing how fast -  easily - painlessly it is for them to kill me.  It is one of my strong points - I am a post-war German, I can take the heat, I can take the pain, I have eternity to wait to prove a point.  That is how hardened the children of the American GI's in Germany made our lives as we grew up.  We were NAZI's, we were Jew haters, we were murderers, we were quite literally lower than scum in the hierarchy of the NATO schools.  And it created a class of young men whom have extreme patience.  I can wait to be proven right just as equally as I can wait to see that you get what is coming to you.  And whereas perhaps our fathers and/or grandfathers were NAZI's, I was at least Hebrew by genetics, no one in either side of my family had ever taken a life!  (Well, remember that Vlad the Impaler was one of my forefathers, so yeah all generations since sort of have gone out of the way to not appear like him!  He sort of made up for the next 900 years of my family history!)

And as a Christian, that strength, has been oft tested, never understood, never fully accepted but sought when it is needed.

2 Timothy 3:10-14

That strength is the very basis of being able to be a mentor.  If you want to know about a life worth living - find someone whom can inspire you to follow Jesus!  Because, that is where it can only be found.

But, first you have to find someone whom can play that role in your life!  How can I find that Apostle Paul kind of person that Timothy had in his life?

Look for people who will help you become spiritually prepared:

They Live Transparent Lives.
There is no fakery, they are open for you to see both the good and bad about them.
You can see their struggles.
You know everything there is to know about one another.

They Teach God's Truth.
Paul says to Timothy:
"You saw"
"You were a part of"
"You know what is true"
"You need to stick with the truth"

They Practice What They Preach.
If you are faith - you will be persecuted!
"All" "Will" guaranteed!

The world, evil, Satan will seek to silence you.


Yeah sounds like like a bad sales job here by Paul to his convert Timothy, however, both could see the gains to be greater than the loss the world will try to force upon you.

Paul was a man of patience, willing to be completely transparent, he taught God's truth, he practiced what he preached and he could take the heat - even to the point of being stoned to death!  Of course, in due time, his head was lobbed off by his Roman guards - they did their duty, whom in turn were then immediately executed for having become Christians themselves.

Sad story or one of conquerors?

But the example of the qualities you must find in your own life ...

Pride and Arrogance

It was just after my birthday this year, when I was surprisingly killed by a friend. I never saw it coming, when it happened - I listened because their opinion matters to me, and because God does use our friends as well:  

Proverbs 27:6
Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.

I have mentioned this episode several times because it was a source of shock.  But nothng could have prepared me for what one of "my boys" sent last night:

"Had my old boss over and sitting across the dinner table from me. Asked him if I wasn't a very good employee? He said "well, I fired you 3 times didn't I?

A long conversation commenced and I am here to say that I was convicted in my soul. Arrogance.
I want to tell all the people out there that have experienced my rudeness, brashness and thoughtlessness that I can see it now and understand the animosity I've created.
My apologies go out first to my family and those who have known me the longest. Next to my old flames and the loves of my life - two former wives. Who put up with the most. Then to the rest of you all that I have offended. Had I to do it over again, I would have been different all along the way"

 Now in his 50's he was been a source of tremendous amounts of prayer in my life.  He never understood that he is not 16 anymore and needed to step up and accept responsibility.  He is not a Christian and has lived a solid pagan lifestyle and literally threw a fine mind and all potential away in a drug fueled lifetime.

Yeah, I know the process, I know the feeling of seeing yourself through the truth of someone else's eyes for the first time.

Back in January, confused, abandoned and then attacked - I sought God because their words could not possibly be true.  And I could lick my wounds and know that they were lies but not why they had been directed at me.  Then came the second attack and it was all over for me.

Like this man whom wrote me last night, God showed me, me:  Proud, Arrogant, everything I hate in life - I had become.  My boxes of awards and even the royalties I live off of now - all fueled the development of an arrogant and proud spirit before my fellow man - and unfortunately God himself.  Sure I have a brain and know how to use it, but I never learned how to use a heart - once I had been given one.

I was shattered and emptied.  I was suddenly a shell.  There was nothing left in me.  All there was in left in my life was two friends with no time for me and a raging Gaelic Girl to be sure I never have another positive comment in my life ever again.  As for the one whom vanquished me, well they never knew what they had done - nor the cost I paid then and continue to recover from.

Yeah the young man from 1977, will once again have me query him about interest in God, he gets that from me every year but maybe this time he might be more open.

As for me, the old Kris' death began in 2013 and his burial was in January due to a broken spirit.  In my personal life I am still struggling having to make make life changing choices in a vacuum, knowing that in 29 hours the end of my year will be sealed when i go into that cast and have no one I can rely on locally. 

Yup it has been a challenging year. 

Sigh ...

A New 2014 Goal

I was a mess on Monday.  I was utterly shattered on the inside.  Thursday through Sunday had been mighty hard, trying to deal with someone whom is apparently mentally ill, living in a location from which mental health care can not be forced on others, well - everyone is going to be damaged around that person.

Monday, I had nothing left.  I knew what I needed to do and prepare for, however God seemed to have other priorities.  I found I needed to gather together all of my financial records and it was impressed upon me was that they needed to be destroyed.  Okay, maybe I am going insane here, but they really have no value to me, so I burned them.  Yeah, I kept the stuff needed for tax reporting.  Then went back to working on Gaelic Girl's dead car.  And honestly, I was wondering if something was wrong with my mind ...

But, I needed to get a hose that is not available, so I ordered one from the local parts store.  In the mean time GG had returned and was beating her head with the bathroom room while screaming.  Yeah, as I said, mentally ill.  So, I moved on to making an easy dinner of tacos - her favorite.

After dinner, GG then demanded all of the financial records from me and I thought how utterly bizarre!  What are the odds?  So she spent the night working on proving that I am stealing money from her - only to discover that I have been using 100% of my royalty payments to supplement her income to retain her house for a year now. She exploded!  It was not what she wanted to find!

And this then lead to a two hour lecture from her on all of my character flaws (oh I have flaws, but apparently she does not even know about them!) and told me I need to leave because from her standpoint, it is over.  I am not sure what "it" is here, everything died long ago.

I just sat there and thought to myself, if I had kept those receipts she would know that I do spent a little bit a month on me - about $50, sometimes $100 a month, which does not seem unreasonable in my mind.  But, God seems to have protected me and frustrated her evil desires to justify herself.  I was awed and still do wonder what the full implications are, God rarely seems to have me do something weird without a much larger purpose.

For me, over the weekend I had already reconciled myself to knowing I need to sell off virtually everything I own in order to end debt to the US IRS for taxes in 2012 and now what I owe for 2013, end my short term debt I have lived with from father's funeral in 2010, then I need a small van or truck.  I do not know if I can raise that kind of money but certainly I can get closer to $0 in debt and have a car to live in at least.  Then GG can refinance to a much lower mortgage and go into 2015 able to pay her own way without me.

So apparently I have a goal in 2014, get out of GG's life ...
Sigh ...

Prayer Works

So, thank you my dear readers, your combined prayers have literally worked a miracle so far this week!

Kathy's surgery went extremely well on Tuesday.  I was able to yak at her a little yesterday and it turned out that her leg swelling (which looked much like mine) the doctors were theorizing was related to gall bladder troubles.  So, they removed it on Tuesday and her leg returned to normal size on Wednesday!  If that is not awesome, then I would be surprised by your definition!  But, who would have thought a gall bladder would do that?

As for me, this morning was the first morning since mid November that my right foot was been close in size to the normal left one!  If anything, I have been standing way too much for it this week and yet it has still gone down in size.

I have been having to stand for several hours at a time working on the Lincoln, sigh.  So today will be day four of trying to pull a waterpump off of the engine - talk about badly designed !  You literally have to pull everything on the engine to get to the waterpump.  Amazing.  It is not like waterpumps are ever changed on cars!

And this has to be coldest week since 1992!  The worse was yesterday where the temperature actually got up to 24 degrees!  Today will be barely better at 30!  And I have no cold weather gear anymore.  So jeans and a flannel shirt are all I have for warmth.  And I will still be out there as long as I can trying to pull that darn device today.

But, thank you for your prayers ... my leg and foot pain is greatly reduced, which is all that is allowing me to stand long enough to continue the progress at fixing that car - and I have to have it together tomorrow - sigh ...

Come Together

It seems to be the now prevalent Western mindset that, "I am man/woman", (thump chest loudly), "I need no one ... "  In many ways this has been the Hollywood take on what it took for a person to overcome the wild American frontier, the hearty individualist whom driven by manifest destiny strove forward and conquered a new land!  Thank you Hollywood for that spin on history ...

In all of my reading of diaries of the pioneers, frontiersmen, explorers, etc - there was one (1!), only one, like that!  Without exception most of the fur traders, explorers, etc started out as missionaries using fur to finance their finding, living and witnessing to the American Indian.

Wait a minute!  No they were loners, they ate anything that moved and often each other!  They took what they wanted.  They killed all whom opposed.  Yeah, right.

These "individualists" traveled in groups, died in groups, were wholly dependent upon one another for survival, companionship - every aspect of life.  There was no "me first" or "only me" mentality, that is Hollywood's effect on culture, not real life.  And I mentioned the exception, yeah he did not fare too well - the other trappers hung him at the first fur trade rendezvous ...  You want to do your own thing, don't expect others to be supportive of the idea in real life.

So aside from this sickness throughout Western Culture now, we were born with an engrained desire, need, requirement for others - to just survive the day to day struggles in life.

And Timothy, dependent upon Paul, now faces his church quite alone.  He is not like them, his background is different, his age is below expectation, and he is supposed to do this single handed?  No, he still needs help to survive.  Luckily as Christians we have the expectation and requirement to be there for one another, in all aspects of life - and particularly in prayer.

2 Timothy 1:15 - 18

Acknowledgement
The Roman Provence of Asia was failing.
The Christian Church of Ephesus was failing.
Paul is facing his own death.
Paul feels his loved ones have deserted him.
Paul feels betrayed, abandoned, discouraged.

So, acknowledge the awful in your life!
Then prepare to move on from it.

Turn to Praise
Look at what Paul does in this section, he praises Onesiphourus!
Find the good around you and praise God for that!
Be thankful today, in all things.

Life can be very bleak at times, especially so when our eyes are on ourselves and our failed desires.
I remember laughing so hard one day when life sucked so bad for me in my early Christian days and the one working with me said, "You know when life sucks and you don't want to pray?  That is when you need to pray the most."  I was laughing because all I would have done is pray!  And, maybe that is what I should have been doing ... instead of concentrating on the negative impact of what it was taking to drag me out of the world and into real life as a Christian!

Become a Blessing
Everyone around you, including you needs encouragement!
Be that encourager to others!
When you see a need think on how to help fill it!
Fund what you can, find resources for what you can not!
Help others to succeed with your help!
And be willing to accept encouragement and help as well!

The Rest of the Story
So how did Timothy do?  History becomes silent because people do not connect the dots.  Paul dies around 60 AD, his head lobbed off after teaching his last class, at their request he baptizes his Roman guards, whose heads are then removed as well.  Then probably around 69 AD John suddenly appears in Ephesus, if he came when James was murdered by the Rabbis in Jerusalem.  He may have come later as well but we know that Mary lived and was buried outside of Ephesus, so in 69 AD she would have already been close to 90!  Ancient for anyone in that day and age!  Timothy's church was given the last living apostle for maybe the next thirty or so years!

Today the Ephesus church lies in ruins.  The Christian believers all fell into apostate beliefs throughout Asia - the lure of the Gnostic belief system was too strong a pull for something as simple as Christianity to stand against.  The Gnostics might have even survived to this day - if a major earthquake had not flattened all of the Provence of Asia.  In the end, God silenced the Gnostics and their "mysteries" of the Christian faith.  Their churches flattened, their books buried until the 1950's, their leaders more than likely dead as well.

Today the Western Church lies in ruins.  It drank the Kool-Aid of Hollywood and the ascended man.  It forgot there was a basis for truth and accepted every lie which became convenient.  And man, left with no standard for belief, much less life, was left to his own resources to become the "individual" and chart a course through life of their own choosing - and in the end blaming God for all of their mistakes along the way ...

Throw away the falsehood in your life!  Find/pray to find, those whom can join with you in truth and encourage one another to make a difference in each other's lives as well your own and ultimately the world around you - after-all, that is why you are here.

Another Antique Show

So another antique show is complete and a part of history now.  OMG!  It was horrible.

Whom would have ever thought that the Seattle Seahawks could make it to the Superbowl - and on the weekend of the show!!!!!  What if they held a show and virtually no one came?  That was the reality of the show however.  Sigh ...

So lots of free time for people watching!

Across the last several years of helping my mother at these shows, I have come to know several of the regulars.  I know I have commented at least once about the broken young woman whom comes and always rushes away whenever sees me.  I can read her and either she or what drives her knows it.  Last year if I spoke to her she would freeze up, avert eyes, stiffen arms - how my heart bleeds for her.  I saw her Friday night as I was helping mother set up, same as always - suddenly freeze, avert eyes, arms lock and then she would stumble at first away and then run.  Saturday morning I went to go buy some scones at the snack shop and found out that the young woman works there with her aunt.  When I approached, she totally shut down again, her aunt had to serve me.  Saturday night I returned to buy more scones figuring she would be gone.  Nope still there!

But haltingly, as though a child speaking its first words, she served me!  I was wowed, she had overcome something internally which allowed her address this scary old man!  And since I first learned to understand her problem in 2011, I have been in prayer for her.  I was elated she could be normal around me.  Sunday morning, she went out of her way to actually talk with me, calmly, looked me in the eyes, went way beyond the normal.  So cool!  Something changed, I would not pretend to know what, but if I see her again at the next show in two weeks - I will try to be gentle.  If you want to join me prayer, I am sorry I do not even know her name (nor expect to, ever).

Even since November, which was the last of this show cycle, the dealers are getting older and fading awaty.  One of my favorites is now in a rest home and a friend of his is now liquidating his collections.  How sad.  Others are obviously not going to be making it into next year, if even into this fall.  The cycle of life: you live it, you become an antique dealer, you die.  LOL,  but not so far from the truth, considering.

And I have noticed how things are simply just not out there anywhere.  A few years ago Mission Style furniture was everywhere - now you are lucky to see one piece a year!  Where did it go, why is it not being recycled?  Weird!  Same is true for Tiffany anything, or anything from the Art Nouveau era.  Art Deco anything is now also disappearing, as has almost all real depression glass.  Like I said, weird.

My knife making friend came with me for two of the days and he put out some collectable antique knives at great prices - absolutely no interest, but then almost no one came!

As for me, I did some shopping: American Indian blankets, baskets, pots - all being dumped; German steins and mugs - all being dumped; antique picture frames, old automotive tools, etc - all being dumped for pennies on the dollar - if not just flat out being thrown away!  Weird.

So, no idea what this all means other than vanishing supply, vanishing dealers and demand seems to not be much either.  Maybe the world is truly being ruled by computer games and like hobbies and crafts - antiquities are now a thing of the past...

I had a great laugh as well.  My mother's dog was sitting behind me and two women are walking towards me.  The see the dog and one of them says, "Well hello cutie!"

I responded, "And, hello to you ..." in as deep a voice as I could muster.  She was instantly embarrassed and trying to explain she was talking to the dog, but it only got worse and her friend is in there making it worse for her.  I was howling with laughter as I said, "Hey at my age you take what you can get!"

Across the isle from me is an old man from Oregon and he then was telling other dealers about this for hours!  It seemed to get better the way he told it though.  LOL

As for the show in two weeks, God still changes hearts and I almost hope to see that young woman again - if it will lead to her freedom.  But, conversely, I still lick my wounds of betrayal and rare is the female I trust anymore (okay, only one).  So ti will be a God thing or not at all.

Getting Past Your Past

I had come to Seattle for spinal surgery in 1997, the world's inventor of the kind of neurosurgery I needed worked out of Swedish Hospital.  My doctors only gave me a 5% chance of surviving surgery and then as a paraplegic at that.  Hence why one would travel to the best of the best.  So, in early 1998 I was allowed to take those first faltering steps and I went to church that week at a place near where I was staying.  Everyone was friendly, everyone introduced themselves, but when this attractive redhead said her name was "Louise" - in my mind I instantly thought "Vonnie".  Do not ask me, I often think I am crazy until proven right even to myself later on.

Decades later, I was in Seattle and popped into that church for services and Sunday School.  During the course of the class there was something said sort of inappropriately and "Louise" jumped in with both feet, swords drawn and leaving a trail of gutted men in her path.  I was horrified by what she shared, no one should have suffered so.  No one should continue to define themselves as the broken person they had been as a child ...

A decade later and I am back for my final cancer screening and Sunday, at that church, back in sunday school, and there is "Louise" and she had brought her mother as a visitor.  Her mother was introduced and I just had to blurt out, "Louise, I know you!  But your name was not Louise, nor was your hair red!"  Everyone howled with laughter.  So she said, "How would you know?"

"Vonnie" was a childhood friend whom I lost touch of in 1964 when my family moved to France.  I liked her but lets face it a normal nine year old really does not care that much about females, especially if they are younger.  However, Vonnie's mother was a teacher's assistant in my classroom in second through fourth grade!  And I am sitting there seeing an ancient version of my TA!  Why bring this up?

Well, Vonnie aka Louise defined herself as that 11 year old girl whom had been raped by her father for several years.  She could not get past it, to her, it was all she was - a piece of meat incapable of ever trusting a man ever again, only being used.  Lunch that day lost its savor, not because of what happened to her forty years earlier (which angered me) but because of whom she had become because of it.

Paul claimed he was the greatest of all sinners.  Personally, I know he was a braggart, because I am the king of sinners.  However, neither he nor I define ourselves by that sin life.  If you are to be defined by your past, do not blame God - He came to put that past to death!  It is the past - not the present and certainly holds no power over your future!

1 Timothy 1:3 - 12

Look Up!
Our hope is in God for our salvation.
Our hope is in Heaven for our future.
Jesus changes people!
Just think of Saul on the road to Damascus.
God gets the glory, God does it all!

Confess!
Admit all of the junk in your life!
The past, then the present.
Every weakness, every failure, every blasphemy against God.
(see Acts 26:9 - 11)

Trade His Mercy for Your Mess!
We are not "owed" mercy because we are ignorant.
God gives mercy to cover our messes.
Though in reality we are ignorant of the true consequences for what we do!
We receive mercy, but not because we deserve it.

God's Grace Flows Around You!
Grace is undeserved blessings.
Your past is past.
Put it at Jesus feet, turn around and walk away ...

Stay

I once worked for a boss so despicable, that you would not even believe the stories I could tell concerning him!  He is the stuff legends are made of in the industry!  The only protection he had was that his mother had married one of the senior vice presidents of the company and he suddenly not only shot up to management but also now had the ability to inflict himself on some 86 people on my project.  And he brought his friends with him, whom suddenly were all made the leads over the rest of us and not of one of them could manage to comb their hair in the morning, they were pathetic.

I hated my job!  I hated him - not the extent of wanting to kill him or anything but to the extent that one of us was going to have to go.  In the end it was 86 whom left and he was able to blame us for the disasters he was causing.  And this project was a big deal!  We are talking country fortunes were tied to our success - but he made it so that no one could succeed!

And I imagine that Timothy found himself in a similar situation in Ephesus.  The book of First Timothy was written to encourage Timothy in his assignment at the church of Ephesus!

1 Timothy 1:3 - 11

Stay In Place!
Remain in Ephesus
Stay where you are
Keep giving it your all
Do not run

Stay On Message!
Do not twiddle your thumbs
Keep the church on target
Beware of universalism

Stay In Love!
Our goal is Love
Demons hate God's Love

Stay With Jesus!
Verses 8 - 11 gives us a list of sins
The Law was for law breakers, not for the doers of the Law

It all comes down to living your faith...

So, at wits end with a manager whom padded billing accounts and time sheets to overcharge the customer, a manager whom put his friends names on our work to make them look better, I finally walked.  I had enough to live comfortably the rest of my life.  I always wanted to get into mining and the American Southwest had several good opportunities, so I went for it.

And it was a disaster!

I returned home and was lamenting my frustrations with a friend and he said something interesting, "God can not use you somewhere else, until you are willing to stay where you are."  It was so uncharacteristic of Dutchman, it caught my attention and I have remembered that one.

As life has shown me, God continually returns me to the Seattle area.  Everytime I leave, I end up back here.  I might be gone for months thinking I will never return, or it might be for a decade, but He continually drags me back - sometimes kicking and screaming!  And I would have not have ever come back, given the choice ...

I know once it was because I had not learned an important lesson, because I ran.
I know once it was because I had something He needed me to do, so I stayed.
I know now He wants a new me, so I am learning.
And I know I need to share this story, because no one would ever believe it ...

Making A Difference

Last week was fairly horrible.  I learned a great deal, I learned a great deal about me, I learned a great deal relationally.
Apparently, God felt I had grown enough to take both barrels of a shotgun to the guts, or He was gracious enough provide the body armor needed to not kill me - just my angel.

So, with lots to think on, pray over, remember, analyze, and come to either a prayer list item on, learn from or understand how to clear up miscommunications.  Yeah, it was quite a few days there, the past five years playing a prominent role in this self evaluation.

And today, I thought on this.  What I just went through has not so bad a lesson for each of us to consider this year!

Pray
We each need prayer, all of us, no matter how well you think you have a handle on life!
Our family members need prayer.
Our religious leaders need prayer.
Our civil leaders need prayer.
Our children's teachers need prayer.
Our government leaders need prayer.
All nations need prayer.
We need to pray for a war against Satan and his inroads into our daily lives.  Sorry, I am not talking denominational anything, bad Biblical theology anything!  I am talking a war on the corruption at virtually all levels in our lives!

You literally would not  want to see my prayer list!

Mentor
Not only do we each need mentoring in some capacity, but we also need to mentor others around us.
None of us know it all, if you think you do - guess what!  You are wrong, I have proof.
We need, in varying capacities, interpersonal relationship help, knowledge and application in dealing with God and others.

Swede beats me up regularly concerning interpersonal relationship, Niece has been driving herself crazy helping this mess of a man learn how to be human, Dutchman keeps my feet firmly on the ground and my eyes on the future and not the darkness of the past, and yes, I have those whom I turn to bounce my thoughts on God off of and visa-versa.  I need lots of help it seems day to day, reaching out to become ... ?  Something, when I grow up, I guess.

Encourage
Everyone needs help in most areas of their lives, whether that is physical or financial help, or just a kind word.
The world is full of people willing to kick your teeth in, praise God when you find one whom believes in you, says the kind word, shares a word of wisdom, etc !
Equally, you can easily be that source of encouragement in another's life - especially with youth!  Everyone appreciates an atta-boy, everyone enjoys a smile and a well wish.  Sure there are those whose are beyond encouragement but 99.9% would like a kind word.
As for youth, they have a world of negatives out there, they hear the constant drone of the drum chanting out how stupid, incompetent, etc they are.  Usually it is just their mind set, translating all messages that way. 

So, be the unexpected, do the unexpected, be an encourager.

Born To Die

Outside of Enoch and Elijah, no one I know of has left this physical exisitence here on Earth and not had to transition through death of the physical body first.  That means that all of us were born to die.

Death is a physical reality to each and everyone of us and of course in all of our schooling we never get the real class we could use like: getting through a parents' death, what are you supposed to do, how are we to face our own death?

Of course, none of us were born to die by design, no we get to thank either Adam or Eve, your choice depending on your Theology, for whom to blame.  So what is the point here?  I have stated a paradox.

The only human being actually born into death, was Jesus.  He came because He knew He had to die.  He came because without His death, all other humans would be lost in their sin.  He came expressly knowing He would die.

One of my better lessons was one which I gave on a Christmas Eve, laying out Jesus' birth, everyone agreed.  I layed out His reason for coming, everyone agreed.  I laid out that His death was foreordained, God knew, He knew, He was going to be sacrificed - His entire reason for being born in the first place - and you would have thought me a heretic for the reception that idea drew.

Really?
The Romans really had a choice not to kill Jesus?
The Jews would really welcome Jesus as their Messiah?
Somehow mankind could choose wisely, choosing Jesus over the lure of sin?
Really?

Dutchman and I sat and talked through yesterday afternoon.  His father-in-law is dying in Holland, multiple cancers, the end was written a year ago, we never thought it would take this long.  Today his sister-in-law is being married by her father, perhaps his last ritual to perform.

I thought quietly back to the day Dutchman got married.  Such a disaster of a day.  Such a blessed day as well.  Dutchman's flaming natural red afro towering over this bride and everyone else other than me (I was still 4" taller at the time!).  It was hot, his youngest brother passed out.

And this giant in the Reformed Church stood there and calmly led a ceremony which basically laid out that if you toss my daughter you are going to die and I am going to ask the best man to do it!  We all three laughed as the blue hairs gasped in the background.

Now he is just a part of history- but more on that when he does pass on.

I thought of my body and its not so slow failing.  Yeah, like almost all other humans I have expected to die.  YOLO was my motto long before those whom use this as a battle cry in this generation were ever born.  Because of the past year now I can understand how true YOLO really is.  Not because I have to pump up the volume of my life, but because each moment is precious - to be shared - to be lived - with the understanding that we here not for ourselves but for others and to represent Him.

This holiday, think on the shortness of this life and how fragile it really is.  Perhaps you might draw the courage to witness just one more time to that aging relative, to comfort those in pain or ill health, to laugh with those in joy.

To my friend, thank you, you have brought me a joy no one would ever understand.
To my daughter, because of you God rewarded me as He probably never has done before.
To my long term friends, you are family, you are now actually loved.
To my family here and in Switzerland, my prayers and best wishes are all yours.
To my God, you sure knocked my socks off this year!
Thank you.

Merry Christmas dear reader.

God's Gift To You

What Is It?

Luke 1:14
Luke 2:10
Luke 10:7
John 15:11
Romans 15:13
2 Corinthians 7:4
Galatians 5:22

Did you figure it out?
Joy, for now, for real, a part of your life!
Joy, apart from circumstances.
It makes no sense - without God in your life.

Get It!

Who can get it?  Well, there was this night outside of Bethlehem and suddenly Angels filled the skies.  And, whom was there to see this manifestation?  The lowliest of the low - shepherds.

Yeah, they were not well thought of by society, after all, they lived "out there".  But, there were notable shepherds: Able, Abraham and all of his sons, and a young man named David.

Share It!

Joy is a choice you have.  It is given to you but you must choose to receive it.  Only then will you be able to share it with those around you.


I am sure when when you first saw my first question, your immediate answer was:  "Why Salvation of Course!".
And Salvation is also a gift, offered to all of mankind.
But Joy is a gift given to all of those whom are called by His name, yeah Christians, the real ones.
With Salvation, God gives you His Presence.
With Joy, God gives you life - no matter the obstacles you face.

And my mind wonders back to 1973 and the look of joy my friend had as he told me of his planned mission trip to Uganda.  Then, the smuggled 8mm film shot secretly by one of Idi Amin's staff, the execution of my friend.  Mind you, the horror of which made a marked impact upon this young Christian.  Similarly, as did the joy my friend displayed knowing that within a heart beat, he was going to be martyred for Jesus.

Joy ..... not explainable, not understandable to the worldly mind, yet what each of us needs to possess.

Kimberly Ann

So there I was standing, staring blankly into the sunrise, I need caffeine, I was stunned I was upright.  Suddenly, a form leaps in front of me! and throws its arms around me, burying its nose in my right armpit!  What is it with my armpits and why are they always on nose level of the females I know?!?!?!?

I pushed the female form back so I could see whom it was.  Surprisingly, it was Kimberly Ann aka African Missionary Girl of years ago!  I was oh so happy to see her!

She had come out here to see her brother and sister-in-law for Thanksgiving, and as fate would have it, me as well!  It was so joyful to see her and talk and share.  There was still so much more to talk about when she had to go but I thanked God for moments we did have.

I spotted her husband a few times but he never approached, so I just hung back.  

So, a pleasant start to an interesting Sunday.

After church is was off to the local Mexican restaurant, where she is demonstrating that the best fried ice cream is to be found here.

Nature of Friendship

Having lost most of my friends last year and most of my acquaintances as well, because I was willing to risk all to do what God told me - and would do so again - I have contemplated the nature of friendship this year.

In years past, friend or no friend, all was meaningless to me - but God had to change me from what I knew to this unknown I slosh through.  But, it had to all happen at once, my nature to be changed, my friends to desert me - the timing perfect.  And yet ...

God knew and God provided - a friend, a teacher, an equal.  When I sat stunned and betrayed, part of me was still trying to work through the mystery of this.  Do not ask me, God's ways and timing are not my own.  I still marvel and wonder where ultimately all will be found ...

He gave me what He knew I would need and it caused me pause to contemplate much about life, being a human being, about me and about God.  In there is the concept of friendship in all of its manifestations.

Proverbs 17:17 - a friend hurts when your hurt.

It takes God's LOVE at all times to be able to be a friend when times are hard.  Hard times show you whom your true friends really are.  And I contemplated that as i saw a slow parade through my room in ER's CCU during the wait for surgery and then the recovery.  Those whom were not my friends evaporated and were not to be found.  And yet, I know, because I do know, though some think themselves enemies of me, they will figure it out and return to find my friendship will not have changed.

Consider Job 6:14, a friend should be there for you - even if you decide to abandon God!  That is commitment and love being spelled out.

Proverbs 27:6 -A real friend will say what needs to be said, even when it hurts you.  They will confront you with the truth.  Everybody needs a real friend - flesh and blood - someone whom will have faith in you, even when we have lost faith in ourselves.

Proverbs 22:24 - avoid the angry man, his ways will rub off on you! 

A real friend will bring out the best in you.  They will encourage you, they will stand, when others fall away.

Whom you choose as friends is extremely important, pick the wrong ones and you will become like them and waste years until  you wake up and realize how you have been played.

Pick the correct ones and you will be encouraged into becoming the best that you can be - and perhaps - even more!

So across this past weekend, a time of reflection and thanksgiving, I am saddened that those whom I counted as friends for decades - were not.  I rejoice for those whom have been so during that same time period and as I have been tried by fire, stood there with me, and suffered as well, then encouraged me to be what I could still be.  Then I rejoice for the new friend, I never could have foreseen, never could have understood and can only marvel at God and wonder, "What is He still up to?"

Thanksgiving

I have always been a big fan of Thanksgiving.  Of course, "always" had to start when my family moved to America.  Our was first Thanksgiving was in Sumter, South Carolina and the base commander had invited us to his house for a southern style feast.  I remember the candied yams, cornbread stuffing and blond daughter the most.  Yeah, she was shallower than the pan the stuffing rested in.  It was a great meal and I learned early on to avoid blonds.

My grandmother lived most of her life in America but since both her parents were foreign, there were no family traditions surrounding this holiday.  "As long as there was mashed potatoes, who needs turkey?", would have been her motto.  At her table, salmon was the normal fall meal, always with mashed potatoes.

A few years ago, I did an extensive study on the entire Thanksgiving question and was rather surprised to find that nothing is carried forward from that first commemoration...

You could not have picked a worse place to land a ship - it was swampland and there was quite simply nothing there!  No game, few fish in the bay and everyone was sickly - and that was just for starters.  As the winter wore on, more and more began dying from starvation.  The ship stores were exhausted, the three men whom had rifles would be away for days in the hunt for anything.  And more died, froze to death or fell overboard and drowned.

When spring came, there were survivors, not many; two out of three were now dead.  And they knew that with spring they could plant and prayed more game could be found.  So, they held a celebration - a solemn occasion to thank God for having made it this far.

They feasted, not upon turkey with all the fixin's, but upon 5 kernels of buckwheat per person.  Their normal daily ration was only three kernels of this grain!  And they thanked God they had that much.

It takes events like this, for each of us in our lives, to remember that whatever we have in this life is from God and we need to thank Him and rejoice for that abundance - no matter how little it is in appearance.

Of course, we know that later the indians found this little group of starving people and brought them food, taught them how to farm, how to find the local plants they knew nothing of and build homes.  Were it not for these indians, there never would have been the celebration of the fall harvest, with all of its bounty, Abraham Lincoln called upon America to remember and observe.

Of course, with the arrival of the second ship - our now established British religious protestors/Dutch survivors were to be overcome by racism, bigotry, superstition and take out these new policies on these same indians whom had saved the first group's lives.  The rest is just history - betrayals, murders, without end, on both sides.

So having learned this, I have across the almost 20 years of having children, started each Thanksgiving meal with five buckwheat kernels on each plate.  To teach my children the difference between thankfulness and bounty.  To remember a time when faith and thankfulness had real meaning.  And, to share with new friends whom would dine with us the story of long ago.

Each year the first purchase of the holiday season is a new bag of buckwheat grouts.  Yeah a pound of buckwheat is quite a few kernels.  Conversely, I actually like making buckwheat cereal for breakfast once or twice a year....

So, as we descend into the madness of this holiday - take a moment and pause to reflect upon how this tradition really started and what it really represented.  And maybe pick up some kernels at the local health store to share around the table tomorrow.

Antiquing

So, the Philippines are being trashed by one of the biggest storms ever on record and Kris does an antique show.  Seems trivial and given the lack of news on American news, I have no clue as to real news involving the typhoon!  Yeah, I can tell you how many breaths any player took during  the latest football game but real news - well just no time for that when football players are breathing!

The show was heavily attended on Saturday, alas the show was four days long however!  But, it is was a good show for me and I sold or traded away about one third of what I had brought - so no complaints from me.

The customers were interesting however.  A tremendous amount of identity challenged came.  It was a bit weird in fact.  My mother, whom I was there to help, thankfully was blissfully ignorant - otherwise her mouth would have been intolerable!  Yeah, she was in fine form and bad mouthing most and borderline out of control through the three days of the show.  Only one nitro to get me through the first day though!

I was torn how to react when a group of ladies came through dressed in 1870's style bustle dresses.  One of them was a guy.  I just ignore such specticals but I had to wonder at why he would want to dress as a woman of 140 years ago.  I mean it is not as if that style of clothing was comfortable in the least.

But the coolest part was cotton-candy girl was there, with her two daughters and she jumped me in a huge bear hug.  Now she is one of my special girls, was so 11 years ago when she was in high school, still is.  I found the rebirth of my emotion for a daughter!  Dead for over a year and yet apparently still there when I am not watchful!  I told her she was loved and she broke down into tears.  No idea what all is going on inside her but I guess that was something she needed to hear - even from a old German.  Since last I wrote of her, she and her husband have bought a house, renovated it and started going to a small church near the home.  Very cool.  I am very happy for the both of them.  That truly was the highlight of the weekend for me!

So got rid of a ton of stuff, bought a bit - some Christmas presents, a few coins for me, some things in trade I can use at my next show.

Very long, very tiring, and very stressful four days.  So terribly glad it is over!

Before God

Timothy is in Ephesus, a Church under attack from the start by Satan.
Paul is writing to his convert, whom he is giving the pastorate of the Church to.

So, I want to pick up with 1 Timothy 5:17 - 6:2.

Elders
By nature non of us are ones to submit, we lack respect for others, relationships are a problem.  Yet we have to choose wisely our elders because they have to be willing to submit, to hold in respect others, to maintain relationships.  Their responsibility is directly the care of the widows, orphans and other leaders in the Church.  I have yet to see a church outside of third world nations where the Church actually does their duties towards widows and orphans in the Church!

If you feel no condemnation here - then your Church is a rare exception or you need to study yesterday's post again.

Pay Properly
Really?  Paul writes to Timothy to tell the church to pay him what he is worth?  Really?
I guess even 2,000 years ago, people were cheapskates and not wanting to pay their ministers.  Admittedly, it was not a new concept in Ephesus, given that it was a pagan ritual site with plenty of taxes and gifts required to support the temples and bathes.  So, what was the point?

Perhaps a challenge for the congregation of Ephesus to make a choice with their drachmas?  Give to the Church or support the pagan shrines.  Make a choice but do not straddle the fence and claim to be a Christian while starving out your pastor.  Could be, heaven knows, I have seen more than one youth pastor starved out of the ministry - and even a few pastors as well!

Chose Carefully
1 Timothy 3:6, 10
The Church must choose carefully - their future reputation is on the line here.
The leadership must not include new converts.  Even I was to learn the value of that one, the year I became a Christian and my church talked me into being a Youth Pastor.  I told them it was a bad idea, but they did not care.  I thought it was because I was special (but it was because they were beyond cheap!).

Candidates must be trusted.  That same church a year later was to see its Eldership, almost to the man, go to prison and jail for everything from embezzlement to securities fraud.  It was a marvel to witness - and to then understand that God does hold those whom would represent Him, responsible.

Witness Well
Your mission on this earth, one a Christian, is to bring glory to God.  And the only thing that brings glory to God is our lives, lived for him, and not ourselves.
We are all equal before God.

Just as a side note, having said that we are all equate is to also say that we are not all equal.  If we have not made our peace with our Creator and accepted Jesus' payment for our rebellion against God - then we are all equal before God - we are all toast.
On the other hand, if we are Christians and have made that choice to place our hope in Jesus' payment, then we are all equal before God - except God will see His Son, not our sinning faces, when we come up for judgement!
And just as someone, through a long line of witnesses throughout history, lead to our conversion, so it becomes our responsibility to do the same for others in reach them for God as well.

In Training

You, I, all of us, are in constant training; training to reach Godliness in our lives - it is the goal.

For as much as we might like it, you can not coast into Godliness.  You will not accidentally discover it - it is something that you must be in training for.

Godliness Is A Big Deal
 If you feed on the world - the things of this world, then you will be damaged spiritually - I have seen this far to often, even with my own childeren.  Too many of us were never discipled when we became Christians, in fact, many of us were purposefully lead astray by "elders" whom may not have even understand the difference themselves.

Most will never actually achieve Godliness, you must be in constant training, it is the goal to which we strive.

Training is not in reading books about the Bible or listening to talks/lectures/sermons on the Bible - it is your purposeful study, meditation and prayer over what you are studying.

I know some are terribly confused and need something to help them.  I have never been let down by Hendrickson's series on the Bible.  Yeah, huge and wordy but it is assembled by some pretty straight men.

Understand, You Have A Choice
There are no excuses, "I don't have time!", sorry Godliness is a choice that you can make, that you must make!  Why?  Because it is your witness to the world around you, if you can show no difference between them and yourself, well guess what?  No one will listen to you!

I read a few months back that the average American home has four Bibles.   The average one ...  Okay, so how many homes actually read their Bible?  Surveys says, only 3%.  Okay again, not everyone are Christians, but supposedly this is a nation of a great many Christians.  By the way if 3% reflects real Christians then guess what! There are only 9,000,000 of us!  No wonder we have lost this nation!

But, I am willing to bet there are millions of Christians, betrayed by their faith, lost, unable to find God, because they never read their Bible and only know what they have been told! 

Be Committed
It takes discipline, that ugly "D" word of religion, but it also has a place in Christianity - to discipline yourself to be trained in the faith.  Paul wrote on this in the terms of being an Olympian - the CONSTANT training, the fight to be your very best, to have the necessary drive to WIN.  And winning is after-all everything at the Olympics.

You must take the time.
You must be committed to change.
You must be willing to fail.
You must force yourself to get back up...

To The End
Remain in training.
Hold on to your commitment.
Accept discipline when subjected to it.
Be willing to disciple others.

Best part is, you will never be there.  The minute you think you have, well welcome to pride and you just failed and get to start over ...

Yeah