I don't have writer's block, but I have been staring at this computer screen for 90 minutes now and no words are forming. I am trapped in a wasteland of frustration, tired of this soap opera drama swirling around me Yesterday I was half way ready to say, "Chuck it!" and walk away.
It has been a hard week. My self esteem is just about at zero - well actually I think most of me is at zero right now. Yesterday, it was a real fight not to throw my walls up and just "enjoy" life, separate and happy in the knowledge I was not going to let life touch me. The way life used to be. But, that is not what God expects of me - transparency, honesty, trust, patience, love. When really, shooting something seems so much more practical!
Life in this household continues to decay. I think I might change my name to Pariah, since I seem to the be the go to guy for dumping on around here. And relationships I would fight to preserve, go sideways, I know what I say but that is not the message anyone hears - Kris talking, full filters employed captain! Yes, everyone has their own take on what they want to see and hear. Reality seems to no longer hold any sway over this household. It is a form of madness. Is there any aspect of my life not under attack right now? I am not aware if there is......
As for success? I can see it, smell it, touch it and it is all so far away. At times like this it seems unobtainable. How can I get from Point A to Point F, when I can not even attain B? I think I am now at the point where even the fool hardy would be willing to throw up their hands in surrender.
So I have to retreat to what I KNOW. God called me, God equipped me, God has shown me His future. And I am completely clueless how to proceed in the face of the opposition I face. Yes, I know this stalemate is all spiritual. And where I need help in overcoming - there is a void instead. It is like God is waiting for something to happen first, then I can proceed as needed - but what is this wait based on?
Yeah, this probably does not make sense.
I am tired and drained.
Even caffeine has not helped this morning.
Monday, April 30, 2012
Friday, April 27, 2012
The Three Christians
So, three Christians walk into a bar.... LOL, no I am not going to tell a joke but it sure seemed a fitting opening! But, seriously:
Have you ever noticed that there seems to be three kinds of Christians?
There are the "God is so good, He gives me everything I want." type.
There are the "Yeah, so what has He done for me today?" types.
And the much rarer, we will just call them the "Involved" ones.
With the spread of the prosperity doctrine, havoc has been brought to the Charisma circles, leaked out and captivated the faith of the weak children. Woe to those preachers whom have so willingly and easily mislead the multitudes....... Of course, these are sheep whom have used the belief that God blesses you and gives you what you want. Really? It must be my Luther Bible, it just does not support that idea. In fact, mine condemns materialism and the accumulation of what you are making your replacement God. No, God is not in the idol making business and He does not need you to have riches for you to use on yourself - my Bible says He wants your obedience above all else, in all things. So rich young rulers, praise the living God and mourn your poverty.
Others are more interesting to me. Everyone can see God's active hand in their life but they do not. In fact, where is that God? "Yeah, I know he was around here yesterday but what about today?" Oh He is still there working in the background but you can not see Him because it is you He is working on! No, I am not thinking of anyone in particular here because this is a common problem with all of us. God gets active and we still see ourselves as how we used to be - or with subtle changes incorporated, but never as the whole person everyone else sees. Of course, in our culture of rapid expectations, we tend to lose sight of any activity which takes over 30 minutes. Where is that God? Right beside you. What has He done lately for me? Well, you are still alive for starters........... Best get to thanking Him for each breath cause those depend upon Him as well.
Of course, I saved the best for last - the one I really wanted to talk about, our involved Christian. Oh, I know you are already forming opinions as to what I am going to be saying, so let me throw you off the track by reading John 11:38-44.
1) Let us start off by getting God out of your box you have put Him in. We are all guilty of saying that God only works in such and such a way. Or He is capable of doing anything, except...... (fill in the blank). That is putting God in a box. Yeah, we take Him out, dust Him off occasionally and then hit Him with our never ending shopping list of wants and desires. Even I am guilty here, because of my "knowledge" of how God works, I could not allow for what God had planned for me to do - it took quite a large bat, over the head, for me to understand that the God of creation and the universe was completely capable of telling me to not only become completely vulnerable, but to put at risk everything I prize, to accomplish His goal. Whoa! Do you understand what I just said? God demanded that I put at risk my sunday school teaching, my witness, what people think of me, even my own family - in order to be obedient.
Now switch back to our passage and think of Martha here. Her brother is dead, her brother is rotting in the grave, Jesus could have saved him but was just too late. And now what? Martha believes in the resurrection, but she knows that it will not come - yet. Is anything too hard for Jesus? Yes, when you really do not understand that He is God..... Read: Genesis 18:14, Jeremiah 32:27 and Ephesians 5:20 as you consider this.
2) So Jesus told them to roll away the rock which was sealing the tomb. Hold your breath here, this is really going to stink! I suspect that no one was really in favor of this idea. First off, it was going to be a major problem. Graves were unclean, dead bodies were unclean, either would contaminate your body so that you were banded from attending Synagog! And a devote Jew would not wish that, nor the cleaning process so you could attend a week later! Next up, who wants to smell a rotting corpse? Certainly Martha did not want the tomb opened, to be reminded of the state of her dead brother, to relive the pain of his death all over again. No just leave it shut.
But Jesus was so insistent.....
3) The stone is rolled away. Was there the smell of rot? Probably. Was Lazarus reclined and wanting a lite beer? No, he was quite dead. And Jesus calls him out.....
Believe
You will see
God's Glory
Miriam and Martha got joy.
4) Those whom remained were to witness the resurrection of life to Lazarus' body. But, in order to witness this event, they had to PARTICIPATE in the event.
They had to overcome their religious tenants.
They had to roll away the stone.
They had to unwrap Lazarus from his shrouds!
Just think about the converse here. The village people could not overcome their tradition and touch a grave, so the stone stayed in place. The people could not come to have the faith in Jesus it would take to be a participant in this miracle. Instead they took up stones and beat Jesus and the slow running disciples to death..... Yeah, not so far fetched as you might think.
We fail because we do not participate.
We fail because we can not let go of our tradition.
We fail because we want to fix people before they are actually alive.
We fail because we abandon the living and hope they make it on their own.
It takes lots of patience to help others.
It takes real love to be willing to pour yourself into another, without thought of "payback".
It takes a miracle for you to be vulnerable and at risk for another.
It takes a miracle for everything to come together for God to work.
It takes only your willingness to be used, to change the future of others.....
So, what is the big idea here? God wants to involve you in what He is doing for others, so get involved!
Have you ever noticed that there seems to be three kinds of Christians?
There are the "God is so good, He gives me everything I want." type.
There are the "Yeah, so what has He done for me today?" types.
And the much rarer, we will just call them the "Involved" ones.
With the spread of the prosperity doctrine, havoc has been brought to the Charisma circles, leaked out and captivated the faith of the weak children. Woe to those preachers whom have so willingly and easily mislead the multitudes....... Of course, these are sheep whom have used the belief that God blesses you and gives you what you want. Really? It must be my Luther Bible, it just does not support that idea. In fact, mine condemns materialism and the accumulation of what you are making your replacement God. No, God is not in the idol making business and He does not need you to have riches for you to use on yourself - my Bible says He wants your obedience above all else, in all things. So rich young rulers, praise the living God and mourn your poverty.
Others are more interesting to me. Everyone can see God's active hand in their life but they do not. In fact, where is that God? "Yeah, I know he was around here yesterday but what about today?" Oh He is still there working in the background but you can not see Him because it is you He is working on! No, I am not thinking of anyone in particular here because this is a common problem with all of us. God gets active and we still see ourselves as how we used to be - or with subtle changes incorporated, but never as the whole person everyone else sees. Of course, in our culture of rapid expectations, we tend to lose sight of any activity which takes over 30 minutes. Where is that God? Right beside you. What has He done lately for me? Well, you are still alive for starters........... Best get to thanking Him for each breath cause those depend upon Him as well.
Of course, I saved the best for last - the one I really wanted to talk about, our involved Christian. Oh, I know you are already forming opinions as to what I am going to be saying, so let me throw you off the track by reading John 11:38-44.
1) Let us start off by getting God out of your box you have put Him in. We are all guilty of saying that God only works in such and such a way. Or He is capable of doing anything, except...... (fill in the blank). That is putting God in a box. Yeah, we take Him out, dust Him off occasionally and then hit Him with our never ending shopping list of wants and desires. Even I am guilty here, because of my "knowledge" of how God works, I could not allow for what God had planned for me to do - it took quite a large bat, over the head, for me to understand that the God of creation and the universe was completely capable of telling me to not only become completely vulnerable, but to put at risk everything I prize, to accomplish His goal. Whoa! Do you understand what I just said? God demanded that I put at risk my sunday school teaching, my witness, what people think of me, even my own family - in order to be obedient.
Now switch back to our passage and think of Martha here. Her brother is dead, her brother is rotting in the grave, Jesus could have saved him but was just too late. And now what? Martha believes in the resurrection, but she knows that it will not come - yet. Is anything too hard for Jesus? Yes, when you really do not understand that He is God..... Read: Genesis 18:14, Jeremiah 32:27 and Ephesians 5:20 as you consider this.
2) So Jesus told them to roll away the rock which was sealing the tomb. Hold your breath here, this is really going to stink! I suspect that no one was really in favor of this idea. First off, it was going to be a major problem. Graves were unclean, dead bodies were unclean, either would contaminate your body so that you were banded from attending Synagog! And a devote Jew would not wish that, nor the cleaning process so you could attend a week later! Next up, who wants to smell a rotting corpse? Certainly Martha did not want the tomb opened, to be reminded of the state of her dead brother, to relive the pain of his death all over again. No just leave it shut.
But Jesus was so insistent.....
3) The stone is rolled away. Was there the smell of rot? Probably. Was Lazarus reclined and wanting a lite beer? No, he was quite dead. And Jesus calls him out.....
Believe
You will see
God's Glory
Miriam and Martha got joy.
4) Those whom remained were to witness the resurrection of life to Lazarus' body. But, in order to witness this event, they had to PARTICIPATE in the event.
They had to overcome their religious tenants.
They had to roll away the stone.
They had to unwrap Lazarus from his shrouds!
Just think about the converse here. The village people could not overcome their tradition and touch a grave, so the stone stayed in place. The people could not come to have the faith in Jesus it would take to be a participant in this miracle. Instead they took up stones and beat Jesus and the slow running disciples to death..... Yeah, not so far fetched as you might think.
We fail because we do not participate.
We fail because we can not let go of our tradition.
We fail because we want to fix people before they are actually alive.
We fail because we abandon the living and hope they make it on their own.
It takes lots of patience to help others.
It takes real love to be willing to pour yourself into another, without thought of "payback".
It takes a miracle for you to be vulnerable and at risk for another.
It takes a miracle for everything to come together for God to work.
It takes only your willingness to be used, to change the future of others.....
So, what is the big idea here? God wants to involve you in what He is doing for others, so get involved!
Thursday, April 26, 2012
Rehosting
I have been sniffing around for a different blog to use as my host for my various sites. I will blame this on Jim, since he moved his site over to Wordpress a while back and Blogger is now changing their interface into something less useful.
So I created a dummy to see how it worked and if it could do what I appreciate most about Blogger. Sadly the answer was no. There might be ways of doing this but I just have not found them it seems. I will play more and see.
Also checked out a two other sites but was not impressed with them either - and yet, when Blogger enforces their new approach, it will no longer be what I like about Blogger either. Yeah, if you have not seen the new interface, just remember at how MicroSquish took us from XP to VISTA and heralded this as progress. Were that Win7 was even as good as XP.....
So now not sure sure what to do.
And unfortunately, I am appalled by a great deal of what I can EASILY find WordPress and Tumblr. I really do not want to draw my readers over to sites where pornography is almost a by-word for their sites. Yeah, just call me old fashioned but I do not need to see nor read about what you should not be involved in. So judgmental of me! Yeah, I am one of those whom do complain to Blogger when I stumble across inappropriate blogs. Taking all of the fun out of blogging, huh?
So what is one to do? I have not successfully found a Christian blog where it is a support shell for blogs. They are more text oriented question and answer sites. But you know of one - please let me know so I can sniff it! Then would they let me post what I do, or would it be objectionable since my Christian faith is not a real match for the average American Theological approach!
So I created a dummy to see how it worked and if it could do what I appreciate most about Blogger. Sadly the answer was no. There might be ways of doing this but I just have not found them it seems. I will play more and see.
Also checked out a two other sites but was not impressed with them either - and yet, when Blogger enforces their new approach, it will no longer be what I like about Blogger either. Yeah, if you have not seen the new interface, just remember at how MicroSquish took us from XP to VISTA and heralded this as progress. Were that Win7 was even as good as XP.....
So now not sure sure what to do.
And unfortunately, I am appalled by a great deal of what I can EASILY find WordPress and Tumblr. I really do not want to draw my readers over to sites where pornography is almost a by-word for their sites. Yeah, just call me old fashioned but I do not need to see nor read about what you should not be involved in. So judgmental of me! Yeah, I am one of those whom do complain to Blogger when I stumble across inappropriate blogs. Taking all of the fun out of blogging, huh?
So what is one to do? I have not successfully found a Christian blog where it is a support shell for blogs. They are more text oriented question and answer sites. But you know of one - please let me know so I can sniff it! Then would they let me post what I do, or would it be objectionable since my Christian faith is not a real match for the average American Theological approach!
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Belief or Faith?
As I sit here, happy and listening to Ukulele music on YouTube, I got to thinking about belief and faith......
In my college age days we were quite a pack of wise guys (different term applies but as this is a G rated site after all!). We had been looking at the concept of faith and belief. Now the exorcist was popular at the moment and one of the guys leans over Sister Bekka and hollers, "Do you believe Jesus is the Christ?" And totally deadpan, Bekka rolls her eyes and almost whispers, "Even Satan believes Jesus is the Christ, who do you think was behind the crucifixion..... He just does not have any faith."
Oh, Tmothy (different one) was so totally owned on that one! We howled for quite a long while over that. If anything Bekka was always the straight woman, always dead on target and always hilarious!
Please read Hebrews 11. Here Paul lays out a wonderful discourse on the concept of faith in God. (Oh, just in case, yes Hebrews was written by Saul/Paul. We know this due to a complete copy of the text dated to 164 ad, which was a transcript from a copy made from the original and dated 48 ad. It does contain the standard Paul greeting and is the artifact property of the US Government - being a gift from Turkey.....) Anyways, back to faith.
It is easy to believe in something; if you can see it, taste it, smell it, touch it, hear it - yeah, belief comes easy. But, what about faith - it is none of those things. It is what is hoped for and not seen (v 1-2). You can not even measure your faith in success or failure because, well the one whom requires the faith, is looking for your obedience in faith. There is nothing worse that someone completely knocked for a loop because they were sure God told them to do something and guess what - it was an utter failure! How could this be? Oh yeah, they are in sin. they did something wrong, etc.
Well, did God really tell them? Did they misunderstand? Were they in a fantasy world? Or was God testing their faith in Him and their obedience in what He told them? If the latter, then success or failure is meaningless - God provides all opportunities and all successes. Guess what, He also provides failures for us to learn and grow from.
When I think of daughter, on the mission field, in what had to be a major ministry disaster for any Christian, one's faith is easily challenged. Oh yeah, God pulled her out and she counted this failure. But was it? Did she minister to others? Did she learn something of value? Did she make a difference? I think the answer to all three is yes. But, things were not as expected, things did not "work out", things were a mess. But, then, God knew all of that before she went. There are no "accidents" with God.
I have read many times the adage that Faith = Belief + Trust + Action.
Yeah, you have to have belief in what you are called to do (salvation or service) and you have to equally have trust that what you believe is true - AND - the coming step of faith is correct. It is our will, emotions and mind - in AGREEMENT with God, having an ATTITUDE of trust, WILLING to take action when the opportunity presents itself (not when it is convenient with us!).
Faith is the reality of what is expected by us of God. Faith is the evidence of what is the not seen, yet. Faith is what we hope for, what is already there waiting for us. You can not have Spiritual Wisdom without a hefty dose of faith; there is no understanding without illumination by the Holy Spirit and faith. There is no Spiritual Worship without faith; how can we worship what we have no faith in? "The fool in his heart has said there is no God"; where "fool" implies one whom is morally deficient. Faith is our moral response to the character of God. And, faith is required for Spiritual Growth; no faith means no growth.....
Read through the list of characters Paul gives us as examples in the faith! Abel, Enoch, Noah, Abraham through Gideon, David and Samuel - all patriarchs of the Jewish faith, their faith in God what distinguished them from obscurity. But, a host of verses come to mind! Read through: Habakkuk 2:4, Romans 1:17, Hebrews 10:38, Mark 9!
Equally, through faith we please God. Through faith God gives us His treasure. And faith is not something you can earn or have, it is something which is given to you! Ephesians 2:8, II Peter 1:1, Philippians 1:9, Hebrews 12.
Faith is the product of our success in understanding Jesus as the Messiah. He is the beginning and completion of your faith.
Paul uses the metaphor of running a race, probably in the year of the Olympic Games - but not in London I am afraid.
You must train:
In my college age days we were quite a pack of wise guys (different term applies but as this is a G rated site after all!). We had been looking at the concept of faith and belief. Now the exorcist was popular at the moment and one of the guys leans over Sister Bekka and hollers, "Do you believe Jesus is the Christ?" And totally deadpan, Bekka rolls her eyes and almost whispers, "Even Satan believes Jesus is the Christ, who do you think was behind the crucifixion..... He just does not have any faith."
Oh, Tmothy (different one) was so totally owned on that one! We howled for quite a long while over that. If anything Bekka was always the straight woman, always dead on target and always hilarious!
Please read Hebrews 11. Here Paul lays out a wonderful discourse on the concept of faith in God. (Oh, just in case, yes Hebrews was written by Saul/Paul. We know this due to a complete copy of the text dated to 164 ad, which was a transcript from a copy made from the original and dated 48 ad. It does contain the standard Paul greeting and is the artifact property of the US Government - being a gift from Turkey.....) Anyways, back to faith.
It is easy to believe in something; if you can see it, taste it, smell it, touch it, hear it - yeah, belief comes easy. But, what about faith - it is none of those things. It is what is hoped for and not seen (v 1-2). You can not even measure your faith in success or failure because, well the one whom requires the faith, is looking for your obedience in faith. There is nothing worse that someone completely knocked for a loop because they were sure God told them to do something and guess what - it was an utter failure! How could this be? Oh yeah, they are in sin. they did something wrong, etc.
Well, did God really tell them? Did they misunderstand? Were they in a fantasy world? Or was God testing their faith in Him and their obedience in what He told them? If the latter, then success or failure is meaningless - God provides all opportunities and all successes. Guess what, He also provides failures for us to learn and grow from.
When I think of daughter, on the mission field, in what had to be a major ministry disaster for any Christian, one's faith is easily challenged. Oh yeah, God pulled her out and she counted this failure. But was it? Did she minister to others? Did she learn something of value? Did she make a difference? I think the answer to all three is yes. But, things were not as expected, things did not "work out", things were a mess. But, then, God knew all of that before she went. There are no "accidents" with God.
I have read many times the adage that Faith = Belief + Trust + Action.
Yeah, you have to have belief in what you are called to do (salvation or service) and you have to equally have trust that what you believe is true - AND - the coming step of faith is correct. It is our will, emotions and mind - in AGREEMENT with God, having an ATTITUDE of trust, WILLING to take action when the opportunity presents itself (not when it is convenient with us!).
Faith is the reality of what is expected by us of God. Faith is the evidence of what is the not seen, yet. Faith is what we hope for, what is already there waiting for us. You can not have Spiritual Wisdom without a hefty dose of faith; there is no understanding without illumination by the Holy Spirit and faith. There is no Spiritual Worship without faith; how can we worship what we have no faith in? "The fool in his heart has said there is no God"; where "fool" implies one whom is morally deficient. Faith is our moral response to the character of God. And, faith is required for Spiritual Growth; no faith means no growth.....
Read through the list of characters Paul gives us as examples in the faith! Abel, Enoch, Noah, Abraham through Gideon, David and Samuel - all patriarchs of the Jewish faith, their faith in God what distinguished them from obscurity. But, a host of verses come to mind! Read through: Habakkuk 2:4, Romans 1:17, Hebrews 10:38, Mark 9!
Equally, through faith we please God. Through faith God gives us His treasure. And faith is not something you can earn or have, it is something which is given to you! Ephesians 2:8, II Peter 1:1, Philippians 1:9, Hebrews 12.
Faith is the product of our success in understanding Jesus as the Messiah. He is the beginning and completion of your faith.
Paul uses the metaphor of running a race, probably in the year of the Olympic Games - but not in London I am afraid.
You must train:
- know your scripture
- observe God requirements of you
- we are disqualified by sin - so get real!
- consecrate yourself for/to God
- do not look to the prize - look to the race!
- distractions on/in our path will be penalties..... just sayin.....
- live your faith - your witness if you daily walk!
- be prepared to answer for yourself
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Feelings
Last evening I was yakking with daughter and she made a comment that stopped me and made me think about the changes which have occurred within me over the past several months.
Some of them are physical. I have gone my entire adult life having to shave perhaps twice a month at the absolute most. Yeah, I just blame the "American Indian" side of me (according to the Bureau of Indian Affairs. I am not going to argue, it got me grants for college, but honestly, I doubt there is a drop of AI in me. Incredibly thick head of hair, zip on the face. Dutchman and I once had a race at age 18, whom could grow a mustache. Yeah, at six months I had about as much as he at three days! And suddenly now? Every other day if I do not mind being "scruffy" in-between and daughter does not complain. Puberty at 57?
Some of them are emotional. It hurt me greatly in December to be reminded that I am by genetic nature broken. Relegated to that minor percentage of humans whom are so broken that psychiatry prizes us when they can find one of us, still a live and not prison, because statistically there are at most 167,000 in a population the size of this world even born. Yeah, that one hurt big time. I had managed to forget, to almost feel normal, to know deep within me that the emptiness is something only God would ever fill. But, what if I told you that this sociopath is experiencing real emotion? (You scoff, how can I actually feel real emotion?) Yeah, I know God put LOVE there. Yeah, I know that it has grown from its basic roots. Yeah, it is alien and foreign, and very hard to deal with. I am middle aged, this is confusing, this is change. Is it a reward for being faithful to God? Is it what is needed at this time, for what I am doing? Very interesting, as Artie Johnson would say.....
Then there are the spiritual changes. I find within myself, a side of my Christianity I walked away from. Part my Hebrew roots, part my Hutterite past, part the charisma of what I then fell into. Yeah an odd mix. But it is a reawakening of sorts. Part needed by daughter, part I do not understand as to why it is resurfacing. In a way, I am returning to my roots of faith and re-examining, weighing, judging, etc. Probably a good exercise for all of us to do occasionally.
But, all of this leaves me in a very good mood this morning again, so how about something fun to share:
Some of them are physical. I have gone my entire adult life having to shave perhaps twice a month at the absolute most. Yeah, I just blame the "American Indian" side of me (according to the Bureau of Indian Affairs. I am not going to argue, it got me grants for college, but honestly, I doubt there is a drop of AI in me. Incredibly thick head of hair, zip on the face. Dutchman and I once had a race at age 18, whom could grow a mustache. Yeah, at six months I had about as much as he at three days! And suddenly now? Every other day if I do not mind being "scruffy" in-between and daughter does not complain. Puberty at 57?
Some of them are emotional. It hurt me greatly in December to be reminded that I am by genetic nature broken. Relegated to that minor percentage of humans whom are so broken that psychiatry prizes us when they can find one of us, still a live and not prison, because statistically there are at most 167,000 in a population the size of this world even born. Yeah, that one hurt big time. I had managed to forget, to almost feel normal, to know deep within me that the emptiness is something only God would ever fill. But, what if I told you that this sociopath is experiencing real emotion? (You scoff, how can I actually feel real emotion?) Yeah, I know God put LOVE there. Yeah, I know that it has grown from its basic roots. Yeah, it is alien and foreign, and very hard to deal with. I am middle aged, this is confusing, this is change. Is it a reward for being faithful to God? Is it what is needed at this time, for what I am doing? Very interesting, as Artie Johnson would say.....
Then there are the spiritual changes. I find within myself, a side of my Christianity I walked away from. Part my Hebrew roots, part my Hutterite past, part the charisma of what I then fell into. Yeah an odd mix. But it is a reawakening of sorts. Part needed by daughter, part I do not understand as to why it is resurfacing. In a way, I am returning to my roots of faith and re-examining, weighing, judging, etc. Probably a good exercise for all of us to do occasionally.
But, all of this leaves me in a very good mood this morning again, so how about something fun to share:
Monday, April 23, 2012
Follow Up
Friday night, daughter and I had a teleconference with her mother. Her mother had decided that the environment here is just plain toxic on her daughter. I agree. But is this the result of something God has wrought? What are the odds that a house full of "Christians" are going to turn on someone in unison and completely ignore what is happening under this roof? It makes no sense, unless the entire point of this situation is to isolate her and make her COMPLETELY dependent upon me. But, back to the conversation.
Prior to this telecon, daughter shared with me that her mother wanted her out. It saddened me so much to hear this, but I could understand the reasoning and why a mother would want that. I would not want my daughter to be continually blown off, lonely and hurting - no matter how greatly she has been helped. And I told daughter I would not come between her and her mother. I was really hurting/angry at how evil was winning this round. But, she slipped her hand in mine and said she was going nowhere..... She was going to choose to stay and I understood her expression of love, as well as, the reality of the identity we have forged.
Oh, the telecon? Yeah, once I told the both of them that the pastor and his wife were throwing their support behind what God is doing - everything became a mute point. Yeah, maybe I am the only one whom can identify with daughter under this roof, but that is one more than is outside the front door.....
Sunday the sermon was very interesting. It was obvious that part of the sermon had been modified by Friday's discussion with the pastor.
I am sure he had already picked the topic, I know the outlines are printed on Tuesday, for folding on Wednesday and Thursday, for handing out with the bulletins on Sunday morning. And yet.....
He spoke on John 12, Miriam has cracked open a jar of Nard and is giving Jesus a pre-death anointing. She alone knew what was coming, she alone understood - the apostles were in her face over her wastage of something so valuable. Jesus told them to shut up. The entire sermon revolved around the scent of Nard, each section building on the previous - and then he got to the part where the apostles were told to shut up.
Think about this. You are in an auditorium with 500 of the closest strangers in town. The pastor is walking the stage, each time he comes to the concept of the broken jar - he is standing directly in front of daughter and looking at her. Each time he reaches the point of Jesus commanding the critics to shut up - he is standing in front of her. Each time he is making the point about the risk Miriam took by what she did - her act of pouring herself into Jesus - he is standing in front of daughter again.
Yeah, you think my daughter caught the point? Kris was tasked by God to pour himself into this young woman, to bring her out of bondage. God broke my being to set her free, to cover her with the scent of His blessing. I am still amazed. I wish all of my internet readers could see the changes I see - and rejoice with me!
Do you think anyone else in the audience caught what the pastor was saying? Probably not. I am going to go get a copy of that sermon and give it to Gaelic Girl. I doubt she will listen to it, but if she does, I think she will get the point as well. It would be better on video to really drive home the point though. And somehow I still need to figure out how to tell her that the pastor does not agree with her nor does his wife. Oh yeah, that ought to bring the ginger back to life.....
Yes, from a human aspect what God is doing is an incredibly dangerous act for the both of us, but He seems to know what He is doing and I see the changes and the answered prayers. We share concerns and our wonderment, she can not see what others see, she can not weigh the change which has taken place and understand that she is now a new creation. The whisperer is always there in the background, reminding her, tempting her, trying to rebuild the walls she set aside to become my daughter, trying to kill love, trying to steal the victory. But, she is smart enough to let me know and pray with me concerning these matters. I am impressed.
As the pastor ended his sermon, he challenged the audience to be at risk for another, to pour themselves into that person - for the glory of God. And he was back looking at daughter, I could see the joy in his eyes and in his smile. He knows something special does not "just" happen, God has a design on her and I think he is about as excited as I am.
Prior to this telecon, daughter shared with me that her mother wanted her out. It saddened me so much to hear this, but I could understand the reasoning and why a mother would want that. I would not want my daughter to be continually blown off, lonely and hurting - no matter how greatly she has been helped. And I told daughter I would not come between her and her mother. I was really hurting/angry at how evil was winning this round. But, she slipped her hand in mine and said she was going nowhere..... She was going to choose to stay and I understood her expression of love, as well as, the reality of the identity we have forged.
Oh, the telecon? Yeah, once I told the both of them that the pastor and his wife were throwing their support behind what God is doing - everything became a mute point. Yeah, maybe I am the only one whom can identify with daughter under this roof, but that is one more than is outside the front door.....
Sunday the sermon was very interesting. It was obvious that part of the sermon had been modified by Friday's discussion with the pastor.
I am sure he had already picked the topic, I know the outlines are printed on Tuesday, for folding on Wednesday and Thursday, for handing out with the bulletins on Sunday morning. And yet.....
He spoke on John 12, Miriam has cracked open a jar of Nard and is giving Jesus a pre-death anointing. She alone knew what was coming, she alone understood - the apostles were in her face over her wastage of something so valuable. Jesus told them to shut up. The entire sermon revolved around the scent of Nard, each section building on the previous - and then he got to the part where the apostles were told to shut up.
Think about this. You are in an auditorium with 500 of the closest strangers in town. The pastor is walking the stage, each time he comes to the concept of the broken jar - he is standing directly in front of daughter and looking at her. Each time he reaches the point of Jesus commanding the critics to shut up - he is standing in front of her. Each time he is making the point about the risk Miriam took by what she did - her act of pouring herself into Jesus - he is standing in front of daughter again.
Yeah, you think my daughter caught the point? Kris was tasked by God to pour himself into this young woman, to bring her out of bondage. God broke my being to set her free, to cover her with the scent of His blessing. I am still amazed. I wish all of my internet readers could see the changes I see - and rejoice with me!
Do you think anyone else in the audience caught what the pastor was saying? Probably not. I am going to go get a copy of that sermon and give it to Gaelic Girl. I doubt she will listen to it, but if she does, I think she will get the point as well. It would be better on video to really drive home the point though. And somehow I still need to figure out how to tell her that the pastor does not agree with her nor does his wife. Oh yeah, that ought to bring the ginger back to life.....
Yes, from a human aspect what God is doing is an incredibly dangerous act for the both of us, but He seems to know what He is doing and I see the changes and the answered prayers. We share concerns and our wonderment, she can not see what others see, she can not weigh the change which has taken place and understand that she is now a new creation. The whisperer is always there in the background, reminding her, tempting her, trying to rebuild the walls she set aside to become my daughter, trying to kill love, trying to steal the victory. But, she is smart enough to let me know and pray with me concerning these matters. I am impressed.
As the pastor ended his sermon, he challenged the audience to be at risk for another, to pour themselves into that person - for the glory of God. And he was back looking at daughter, I could see the joy in his eyes and in his smile. He knows something special does not "just" happen, God has a design on her and I think he is about as excited as I am.
Saturday, April 21, 2012
A New Blogger?
Oh GACK!
What Google is unable to learn its lessons from the failures of others and has had to "play" with their editting interface to create this disaster?
Hello Google! What user base was used to test this and actually thought it better than what Blogger had created years ago? The stupidity of corporate America is numbing in its ability to insist that change will make them more relevant when it is the culture not a GUI that has changed!
Of course they are not listening, much the same as FaceBook does not listen to its user base and continues to implement change for change sake. No wonder there are so many blogging options out there. Oh well, nothing like a 21st century enterprise making a 1975 plunder in system development.
Yah gotta laugh, otherwise you might see a lesson in progress worth learning about!
What Google is unable to learn its lessons from the failures of others and has had to "play" with their editting interface to create this disaster?
Hello Google! What user base was used to test this and actually thought it better than what Blogger had created years ago? The stupidity of corporate America is numbing in its ability to insist that change will make them more relevant when it is the culture not a GUI that has changed!
Of course they are not listening, much the same as FaceBook does not listen to its user base and continues to implement change for change sake. No wonder there are so many blogging options out there. Oh well, nothing like a 21st century enterprise making a 1975 plunder in system development.
Yah gotta laugh, otherwise you might see a lesson in progress worth learning about!
Friday, April 20, 2012
Bowing to Accountability
It took me around 12 man hours to but together a logical presentation on the background of the question I was going to ask. It was cold, concise, honest and transparent, I knew was betraying my best friend. I knew I was going to get kicked.
He sat across from me. He smiled. "You know I have been a pastor for twenty years. I have heard it all, seen it all and am pretty sure I already have your answer. So calm down, take a breath and lets get started." His smile betrayed his comfort.
Two hours later he nodded his head and quietly said, "Ok, I was wrong. I have NEVER come up against a situation like this before...." Now he was uncomfortable. Everything pointed to the usual solution - Kris is in the wrong. However, what God was doing made such plain sense that he could find no opportunity to discredit what has happened. Who is to say that God could not do, what had just been done?
Yeah that is how it is when you slam into the spiritual world, all logic and all normalcy flees. He is as amazed at what has gone on in my life over the past five months as I. There is only one explanation: God happened to move in Kris' life in a big way. Evil took out all of the players.....
Now what to do..... He knew what needs to be done, but not how it can be accomplished. Wisdom will hold no reign over this situation. It is spiritual warfare after all.
Well, no one was more surprised than I at this stance. I expected almost anything other than his surprise and approval. I suppose that much like the Rabbi whom cautioned against opposing Jesus might not be the right thing, just in case he was God ..... Yeah, opposing God really does not work well in the long haul, as my ancient forefathers discovered.
So, where is Kris now? Wondering at how the future plays out.....
He sat across from me. He smiled. "You know I have been a pastor for twenty years. I have heard it all, seen it all and am pretty sure I already have your answer. So calm down, take a breath and lets get started." His smile betrayed his comfort.
Two hours later he nodded his head and quietly said, "Ok, I was wrong. I have NEVER come up against a situation like this before...." Now he was uncomfortable. Everything pointed to the usual solution - Kris is in the wrong. However, what God was doing made such plain sense that he could find no opportunity to discredit what has happened. Who is to say that God could not do, what had just been done?
Yeah that is how it is when you slam into the spiritual world, all logic and all normalcy flees. He is as amazed at what has gone on in my life over the past five months as I. There is only one explanation: God happened to move in Kris' life in a big way. Evil took out all of the players.....
Now what to do..... He knew what needs to be done, but not how it can be accomplished. Wisdom will hold no reign over this situation. It is spiritual warfare after all.
Well, no one was more surprised than I at this stance. I expected almost anything other than his surprise and approval. I suppose that much like the Rabbi whom cautioned against opposing Jesus might not be the right thing, just in case he was God ..... Yeah, opposing God really does not work well in the long haul, as my ancient forefathers discovered.
So, where is Kris now? Wondering at how the future plays out.....
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Found It
So playing around on the web and I finally found the song. Yeah so much these days on the web is directly related to how you present your search items, not what you are looking for! How I wish I had my CRAY back! I could have found this in about 6 seconds on that, instead of the hours it took!
So with this cool embeded link you might be able to listen to the song too and join just about nobody else having ever heard of them. Oh yeah, they broke up, hence why so hard to find! Pick "Red Letter Box" as your choice.
I have reached the point in my heart/mind/soul/faith where I can say, "No matter the cost, I will do what is right and serve my God - no matter whom agrees or disagrees with me....." Oh yeah, always a popular choice - not. Thinking on this, I was struck yesterday at how God has done something like as has been happening in my life, these past five months, only in a different context and manner. It is an old testament example complete with what must have made those in Hosea's life write him off as a fool. And God was using him, he was being faithful and completely discounted. Very interesting.
Have a blest day. As for me, I am going to chill through the day and see if I can calm my blood pressure down.....
So with this cool embeded link you might be able to listen to the song too and join just about nobody else having ever heard of them. Oh yeah, they broke up, hence why so hard to find! Pick "Red Letter Box" as your choice.
I have reached the point in my heart/mind/soul/faith where I can say, "No matter the cost, I will do what is right and serve my God - no matter whom agrees or disagrees with me....." Oh yeah, always a popular choice - not. Thinking on this, I was struck yesterday at how God has done something like as has been happening in my life, these past five months, only in a different context and manner. It is an old testament example complete with what must have made those in Hosea's life write him off as a fool. And God was using him, he was being faithful and completely discounted. Very interesting.
Have a blest day. As for me, I am going to chill through the day and see if I can calm my blood pressure down.....
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Alone in Faith
I guess I probably should not have been listening to music yesterday. But, I was in a pretty good mood. I had gotten past the pain of the weekend - so I was listening to some music on my laptop.
Many years ago, I had been surfing the web and stumbled across a site with some interesting bumper music. It took a few days to figure out whom the owner of the site was, get a hold of him and then find out that the music was something he and his friends had recorded. I still like that piece of music. (I would identify it but since it is no longer on the internet, nor is there hardly a mention of his group, well you can't listen to it I guess.)
But, for as much as the music speaks to me, so do the words. And there in lay the problem this morning. They keep circulating around in my head, but they are words of pain being expressed out of context by youth. And those words of pain match the pain I was in over the weekend.
Yeah, the hurt is back. My heart trembles and soul shutters. I whom am to be on as low a stress everything as possible have been off the charts for four days now. And there is literally nothing I can do to gain control of this situation. There are too many players, too many attitudes, too many lies, too much hate - and that just covers the ones I love! And I am not much of a people person in the first place! And those I have long counted on for support are interestingly silent - not returning calls, not returning emails, etc.
So, I can but sit back and watch the implosion as it forms. I have never seen a situation where logic could not prevail, even in the past when Gaelic Girl would go off on a red-headed rant, I could still appeal to logic to calm her down. But even that aspect of her personality no long exists. And as her mental state has diminished, so has my children's attitudes towards me.
Oh yeah God is in control. Yes, prayer does change things. I can see His hand has allowed this implosion to occur. I see myself being drawn out now, from the life I had led to what lies before me. I find my faith growing stronger, a restoration of sorts is in progress - a Kris whom has not existed in a very long time is reappearing but this time with a hazy mission statement. I do not see clearly, only pieces that do not fit together at all - at least with my current understanding. Mystery. So I must be oh so careful, to walk in innocence, to be awful certain I am not the cause of what is happening. And continue to pray for the evil which has appeared to be equally driven away.
So on the one hand I have sadness and desire healing for my family. Where ever I am headed, I would like them to partner with me in it. But, it seems at this time that I am to stand quite alone as far as they are concerned. On the other hand, God is moving in strange ways in my life.
Prayer could really be help for all of the players in this soap opera!
Many years ago, I had been surfing the web and stumbled across a site with some interesting bumper music. It took a few days to figure out whom the owner of the site was, get a hold of him and then find out that the music was something he and his friends had recorded. I still like that piece of music. (I would identify it but since it is no longer on the internet, nor is there hardly a mention of his group, well you can't listen to it I guess.)
But, for as much as the music speaks to me, so do the words. And there in lay the problem this morning. They keep circulating around in my head, but they are words of pain being expressed out of context by youth. And those words of pain match the pain I was in over the weekend.
Yeah, the hurt is back. My heart trembles and soul shutters. I whom am to be on as low a stress everything as possible have been off the charts for four days now. And there is literally nothing I can do to gain control of this situation. There are too many players, too many attitudes, too many lies, too much hate - and that just covers the ones I love! And I am not much of a people person in the first place! And those I have long counted on for support are interestingly silent - not returning calls, not returning emails, etc.
So, I can but sit back and watch the implosion as it forms. I have never seen a situation where logic could not prevail, even in the past when Gaelic Girl would go off on a red-headed rant, I could still appeal to logic to calm her down. But even that aspect of her personality no long exists. And as her mental state has diminished, so has my children's attitudes towards me.
Oh yeah God is in control. Yes, prayer does change things. I can see His hand has allowed this implosion to occur. I see myself being drawn out now, from the life I had led to what lies before me. I find my faith growing stronger, a restoration of sorts is in progress - a Kris whom has not existed in a very long time is reappearing but this time with a hazy mission statement. I do not see clearly, only pieces that do not fit together at all - at least with my current understanding. Mystery. So I must be oh so careful, to walk in innocence, to be awful certain I am not the cause of what is happening. And continue to pray for the evil which has appeared to be equally driven away.
So on the one hand I have sadness and desire healing for my family. Where ever I am headed, I would like them to partner with me in it. But, it seems at this time that I am to stand quite alone as far as they are concerned. On the other hand, God is moving in strange ways in my life.
Prayer could really be help for all of the players in this soap opera!
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Fasting and Prayer
Yeah, not exactly easy to be diabetic and trying to do a fast. But, I did make it through the day, having to finally eat something - so I limited it to something I particularly dislike.
When I was in college I reached a point where my income fell to $60 per month. This happened to be exactly the amount of my apartment rent and so I was able not to live on the streets and for four months wrap up my education. This also meant that I had NO other moneys, money in any form, and due to the economy in 1974 to 1975, there was no opportunity to even get work! My tuition was covered under a grant but books I had to pay for myself. So, I would write programs for local manufacturers, for incredibly low rates!, in order to pay for those books!
And of food? Well, there was none during this time. I had a box of crackers and would eat ten of them a day. Not exactly a wonderful, well balanced diet, but it was what I had and I was thankful to God for it! On the last month, I had to cut even the number of crackers in half in order to make it through the month! I tried food stamps but it seems back then that if you were in school, it is assumed someone other than you is supporting you and you get nothing. Six foot, five inches tall and I was down to 115 by then. Yeah, the guy at the welfare office actually gave me some money from his pocket! Tough times.
The starvation ended one afternoon when I went back to my apartment and there was a knock on the door. It was my neighbor whom told me someone had dropped these four bags of groceries off during the day and he did not want them stolen. What?!?!?! I lived on prostitution row, you could not trust any of the other tenants with a dime much less a pile of groceries! Talk about a God thing.....
No sooner had I put them away, with great prayers of thanksgiving, than there was another knock and two more bags of groceries appeared! Talk about abundance! But why? It was decades before I found out the answers to that question.
So, every Monday since that afternoon, I have fasted - to remember God abundance, to remember what starvation was like, to thank God for His provision. And then my health issues were diagnosed as diabetes.....
And what of yesterday? Yes, it was a horrible day. My heart crushed by the pain inflicted by my family. The looks of hatred and silent treatment continues. But, God saw to it that my confusion concerning what to do was over, helped me find one of my old seminary professors to shoot an email to, and demonstrated that what I have been and am doing is right on with Him.
I also learned some new information on demonology I was not aware of. I will have to consider more and deal with later. Yeah, the world does not stop turning just because you entire family seems to be possessed at the moment! Right now I have to prepare for tests this week in college and the next month will be super busy! So family will have to suck it up for now until I am free to address their aberrations! Please hold them up in prayer with me, until they can return to "normal"!
Unfortunately, for my family, I understand now where all of this going. No, knowing that you will soon be a pariah is not exactly my idea of a fun future, but it does seem to be where God is pointing and they can come along or they can be comforted in their hatred for me.
Somehow I always expected that if you truly were walking the walk, talking the talk, being blameless before God and all men, that life would be a might easier because of it.....
When I was in college I reached a point where my income fell to $60 per month. This happened to be exactly the amount of my apartment rent and so I was able not to live on the streets and for four months wrap up my education. This also meant that I had NO other moneys, money in any form, and due to the economy in 1974 to 1975, there was no opportunity to even get work! My tuition was covered under a grant but books I had to pay for myself. So, I would write programs for local manufacturers, for incredibly low rates!, in order to pay for those books!
And of food? Well, there was none during this time. I had a box of crackers and would eat ten of them a day. Not exactly a wonderful, well balanced diet, but it was what I had and I was thankful to God for it! On the last month, I had to cut even the number of crackers in half in order to make it through the month! I tried food stamps but it seems back then that if you were in school, it is assumed someone other than you is supporting you and you get nothing. Six foot, five inches tall and I was down to 115 by then. Yeah, the guy at the welfare office actually gave me some money from his pocket! Tough times.
The starvation ended one afternoon when I went back to my apartment and there was a knock on the door. It was my neighbor whom told me someone had dropped these four bags of groceries off during the day and he did not want them stolen. What?!?!?! I lived on prostitution row, you could not trust any of the other tenants with a dime much less a pile of groceries! Talk about a God thing.....
No sooner had I put them away, with great prayers of thanksgiving, than there was another knock and two more bags of groceries appeared! Talk about abundance! But why? It was decades before I found out the answers to that question.
So, every Monday since that afternoon, I have fasted - to remember God abundance, to remember what starvation was like, to thank God for His provision. And then my health issues were diagnosed as diabetes.....
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
And what of yesterday? Yes, it was a horrible day. My heart crushed by the pain inflicted by my family. The looks of hatred and silent treatment continues. But, God saw to it that my confusion concerning what to do was over, helped me find one of my old seminary professors to shoot an email to, and demonstrated that what I have been and am doing is right on with Him.
I also learned some new information on demonology I was not aware of. I will have to consider more and deal with later. Yeah, the world does not stop turning just because you entire family seems to be possessed at the moment! Right now I have to prepare for tests this week in college and the next month will be super busy! So family will have to suck it up for now until I am free to address their aberrations! Please hold them up in prayer with me, until they can return to "normal"!
Unfortunately, for my family, I understand now where all of this going. No, knowing that you will soon be a pariah is not exactly my idea of a fun future, but it does seem to be where God is pointing and they can come along or they can be comforted in their hatred for me.
Somehow I always expected that if you truly were walking the walk, talking the talk, being blameless before God and all men, that life would be a might easier because of it.....
Monday, April 16, 2012
Seeking His Will
How my heart weeps and mourns. She does not understand, all she can hear is the voice of her own accusations. Logic no longer prevails, everything is out of context, anger over rides everything. The wrath of a ginger has befallen me. It has been one tirade after another all weekend long. Just as soon as everyone is gone, she attacks. Honestly, I would rather have my skull split open with an axe than to go through the abuse being dished out.
Apparently, I am doing the right thing, only just doing everything wrong. When I attempt to explain - I am mocked. When I attempt defense - I am choosing a side that is not valid. When I attempt to be gentle - I am being hateful. When I refuse to back down - well that is the whole point, isn't it.
If I am to remain faithful to my God, I have a 40 year old vow I must keep. If I am to remain faithful to my God, I must serve as I am told. Even Gaelic Girl can agree that I am correct in this. But, when I am willing to take a stand against those whom would attack my daughter, even if it is the entire family united against her, then I am just plain wrong, blinded, bewitched.
How could my family have so turned to evil - when miracles are literally occurring under this roof, weekly? How can the changes in her life be so blinded from their view? How ..... ?
So through the whole of the weekend my family has refused to be in the same room with daughter, and not me if daughter is anywhere near. And this is my fault. Their choice now becomes my choice and blame is placed on me for their refusal to any longer live as a family.
Sigh.....
So on Thursday I have a meeting set up with the pastor. I have no idea what I am to say. Would he understand that a man has been called to turn a young woman back to God? Would he understand what it means to be given God's understanding of her? Would he understand the horror with which one sees another's sin and heart? Would he understand the damage done to a female when she does not have a father? Would he understand the adoption process and bonding? Can the term regression even have any meaning to him? In my heart I know this is futility, yet I must seek council, but to what end? .....
Yes, Kris is frustrated and Kris is hurting, and Kris feels betrayed and a host of other painful emotions - and Kris fears abandonment by those he loves. Yet, I am strong because I know God has by back, I know He has equipped me to face the enemy - but the enemy has assumed the guise of my own family!
And I have a daughter's well being to consider.
Even though I am diabetic, I am going to be fasting tomorrow. I must have clarity. I must have spiritual strength. I must be able to face the accuser, without damaging my family further.
Please be in prayer with me on Monday. Success will be found, as long I can stand blameless before God in this matter.
Apparently, I am doing the right thing, only just doing everything wrong. When I attempt to explain - I am mocked. When I attempt defense - I am choosing a side that is not valid. When I attempt to be gentle - I am being hateful. When I refuse to back down - well that is the whole point, isn't it.
If I am to remain faithful to my God, I have a 40 year old vow I must keep. If I am to remain faithful to my God, I must serve as I am told. Even Gaelic Girl can agree that I am correct in this. But, when I am willing to take a stand against those whom would attack my daughter, even if it is the entire family united against her, then I am just plain wrong, blinded, bewitched.
How could my family have so turned to evil - when miracles are literally occurring under this roof, weekly? How can the changes in her life be so blinded from their view? How ..... ?
So through the whole of the weekend my family has refused to be in the same room with daughter, and not me if daughter is anywhere near. And this is my fault. Their choice now becomes my choice and blame is placed on me for their refusal to any longer live as a family.
Sigh.....
So on Thursday I have a meeting set up with the pastor. I have no idea what I am to say. Would he understand that a man has been called to turn a young woman back to God? Would he understand what it means to be given God's understanding of her? Would he understand the horror with which one sees another's sin and heart? Would he understand the damage done to a female when she does not have a father? Would he understand the adoption process and bonding? Can the term regression even have any meaning to him? In my heart I know this is futility, yet I must seek council, but to what end? .....
Yes, Kris is frustrated and Kris is hurting, and Kris feels betrayed and a host of other painful emotions - and Kris fears abandonment by those he loves. Yet, I am strong because I know God has by back, I know He has equipped me to face the enemy - but the enemy has assumed the guise of my own family!
And I have a daughter's well being to consider.
Even though I am diabetic, I am going to be fasting tomorrow. I must have clarity. I must have spiritual strength. I must be able to face the accuser, without damaging my family further.
Please be in prayer with me on Monday. Success will be found, as long I can stand blameless before God in this matter.
OMG
So given what occurred over Friday, Saturday and Sunday, I have been at a loss as to what I can blog. Were I just to say that Satan took one huge whack at the Plattner household, it would be to under describe what has occurred. Let us just limit my comments to: open warfare.
Net results? Lots of casualties all blaming everyone else for the disaster, and yet, there is a cause - for all of this is demonic in origin. As for the victims? There really is only two. The other victims? Well, it is hard to actually be a victim when you are apart of a demonic attack!
And how do you battle that? Well, prayer, lots of prayer - but guess what time for prayer becomes completely compromised to the extent that it is all but impossible. Interesting, eh? Yeah, demonic activity is not fun, it is nothing but misery when you are facing those you love and you can see so clearly.....
Prayer, lots of prayer.
Net results? Lots of casualties all blaming everyone else for the disaster, and yet, there is a cause - for all of this is demonic in origin. As for the victims? There really is only two. The other victims? Well, it is hard to actually be a victim when you are apart of a demonic attack!
And how do you battle that? Well, prayer, lots of prayer - but guess what time for prayer becomes completely compromised to the extent that it is all but impossible. Interesting, eh? Yeah, demonic activity is not fun, it is nothing but misery when you are facing those you love and you can see so clearly.....
Prayer, lots of prayer.
Friday, April 13, 2012
Catching Up
So I finally am catching up with the first Saturday of the month! Yeah, it has been quite an intense month so far. But, at least I have my official 1980's music video up. Enjoy!
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Bible Site
Daughter told me of a Bible site I was unaware of: www.bible.cc. What I like about it is that it is pretty easy to navigate, very "clean" looking and is just as good as the other sites which are littered with advertising.
As you know I have a fondness for Daniel and so have been putting the site through its paces, using Daniel as my benchmark. The site did well.
If I have a criticism it would have to be that a version of the Amplified Bible would be of tremendous help to the average English reader. But, alas, no one really seems to use this great reference Bible! Certainly this is not the translation you would want to memorize any passage out of - but if you wanted to understand a passage - yeah it should be the Bible of choice.
Their main site contains the English, Greek, Latin, German, Hebrew texts. There is also an attached site with versions in numerous languages! (And oh how my German has been slipping! I made it to Genesis 1:5 before I slammed into a word I had forgotten! ARGH! Oh well.....)
So, cheers to daughter whom pointed my nose in that direction!
Well, need to be off!
As you know I have a fondness for Daniel and so have been putting the site through its paces, using Daniel as my benchmark. The site did well.
If I have a criticism it would have to be that a version of the Amplified Bible would be of tremendous help to the average English reader. But, alas, no one really seems to use this great reference Bible! Certainly this is not the translation you would want to memorize any passage out of - but if you wanted to understand a passage - yeah it should be the Bible of choice.
Their main site contains the English, Greek, Latin, German, Hebrew texts. There is also an attached site with versions in numerous languages! (And oh how my German has been slipping! I made it to Genesis 1:5 before I slammed into a word I had forgotten! ARGH! Oh well.....)
So, cheers to daughter whom pointed my nose in that direction!
Well, need to be off!
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Carnality
In my last post, I used the term carnal. Now there is a word I probably have not used since my early days as a Christian! Now why did that pop into mind.....
When I first came to salvation, I was 18, a nerd, I had already designed and built a race car which broke a few speed records, I had created a designer car - which went on to be quite successful in the hand built world, had almost no friends because they had all proven untrustworthy, etc. Yeah not exactly your idea candidate for most anything other than auto mechanics or the world of computers I discovered by accident.
But, through the oddest of events found myself suddenly a Christian. Now those whom I first were to meet and desired to "help" me become a "real" Christian had me read quite a few books, some aimed at young men. Carnality was a reoccurring theme in several of them.
Carnality, is "of the flesh", those authors I read revolved around the lusts and sexual desires common to all young men. Why the italics? Because it was not very applicable to me, but did arouse a curiosity as to what on earth all of the hoopla was about! Yeah, sort of not the point of their writings! And, I have always known I was not like any of the other guys I hung around with.
I tried to battle this nature in my son, without success. The wide spread pornography he was exposed to in school during grade 6 and 7, I was unaware of until it was too late. I was able to limit his internet access, so that was good, once I understood what was going on. But, no one could have curtailed the apparent complete lack of morals by some of the girls both in school and at church. Sigh. He was compromised by the "flesh" so early on.....
My mother commented, following her first Easter as part of the family, that he is a very angry young man. Yeah, she nailed that one. His inner nature is completely compromised by the carnality of his life, friends and existence. And yet, you can not discuss this with him, ever, even as a teenager he would just as soon attack you as run away. Neither were particularly wonderful events. But, the war rages on within him - so there is hope he will be dragged back to God kicking and screaming the entire way! And I dare say, feeling mighty stupid for not listen to his father long ago.
Last night, I told Yesfir of my now long dead friend Chrisine, she too was compromised by carnality. When I think back on the running gags and jokes, I now understand how inappropriate they were. I never understood she was sexually addicted. I never understood that her "wildness" from the ate of 17 to her death were really the results of the carnality she had been overcome by. Her destruction was what it took for God to bring her to salvation. Her death, inevitable given her lifestyle. Her memory I have shared with every Sunday School class and each of my daughters. There is a high price to pay for leaving what God has laid out for your life. For Christine, and my long estranged fiancee, it was HPV. One mercifully died, the other continues to live on in a nightmare of pain.
Such an interesting word, such an array of applications. Of the flesh, yeah, even with my broken nature I can understand the the attraction or draw. Our sex soaked culture only applies this to sex and our sexual natures - almost gnostically, (body=bad, spirit=good) attempting to find both to be sin. It is outside of marriage to be sin, but it is also how God designed us, to celebrate that nature within the confines of marriage.
But in our materialistic world, carnality also reigns - the worldliness so many Christians are sold out to. No? Then consider that sports is also an aberration of the carnality of this world. Christians scream and holler about their anti-abortion campaigns, one-world-government conspiracies and just about every other situation you can think of - and yet not even see sports as also being of the world and sin.
Yet, I find my most thought provoking author, Paul, to be of the mind that "all things are lawful". Of course we can quickly eliminate sin from that list because that is unlawful. So, then the aspects of worldliness are lawful - like being a sports nut - but as he continues, "not expedient". So, yeah, you can play in the world with its distractions - just do not expect to accomplish much for God.
You gotta love Paul....
It is all in how you live your life.....
When I first came to salvation, I was 18, a nerd, I had already designed and built a race car which broke a few speed records, I had created a designer car - which went on to be quite successful in the hand built world, had almost no friends because they had all proven untrustworthy, etc. Yeah not exactly your idea candidate for most anything other than auto mechanics or the world of computers I discovered by accident.
But, through the oddest of events found myself suddenly a Christian. Now those whom I first were to meet and desired to "help" me become a "real" Christian had me read quite a few books, some aimed at young men. Carnality was a reoccurring theme in several of them.
Carnality, is "of the flesh", those authors I read revolved around the lusts and sexual desires common to all young men. Why the italics? Because it was not very applicable to me, but did arouse a curiosity as to what on earth all of the hoopla was about! Yeah, sort of not the point of their writings! And, I have always known I was not like any of the other guys I hung around with.
I tried to battle this nature in my son, without success. The wide spread pornography he was exposed to in school during grade 6 and 7, I was unaware of until it was too late. I was able to limit his internet access, so that was good, once I understood what was going on. But, no one could have curtailed the apparent complete lack of morals by some of the girls both in school and at church. Sigh. He was compromised by the "flesh" so early on.....
My mother commented, following her first Easter as part of the family, that he is a very angry young man. Yeah, she nailed that one. His inner nature is completely compromised by the carnality of his life, friends and existence. And yet, you can not discuss this with him, ever, even as a teenager he would just as soon attack you as run away. Neither were particularly wonderful events. But, the war rages on within him - so there is hope he will be dragged back to God kicking and screaming the entire way! And I dare say, feeling mighty stupid for not listen to his father long ago.
Last night, I told Yesfir of my now long dead friend Chrisine, she too was compromised by carnality. When I think back on the running gags and jokes, I now understand how inappropriate they were. I never understood she was sexually addicted. I never understood that her "wildness" from the ate of 17 to her death were really the results of the carnality she had been overcome by. Her destruction was what it took for God to bring her to salvation. Her death, inevitable given her lifestyle. Her memory I have shared with every Sunday School class and each of my daughters. There is a high price to pay for leaving what God has laid out for your life. For Christine, and my long estranged fiancee, it was HPV. One mercifully died, the other continues to live on in a nightmare of pain.
Such an interesting word, such an array of applications. Of the flesh, yeah, even with my broken nature I can understand the the attraction or draw. Our sex soaked culture only applies this to sex and our sexual natures - almost gnostically, (body=bad, spirit=good) attempting to find both to be sin. It is outside of marriage to be sin, but it is also how God designed us, to celebrate that nature within the confines of marriage.
But in our materialistic world, carnality also reigns - the worldliness so many Christians are sold out to. No? Then consider that sports is also an aberration of the carnality of this world. Christians scream and holler about their anti-abortion campaigns, one-world-government conspiracies and just about every other situation you can think of - and yet not even see sports as also being of the world and sin.
Yet, I find my most thought provoking author, Paul, to be of the mind that "all things are lawful". Of course we can quickly eliminate sin from that list because that is unlawful. So, then the aspects of worldliness are lawful - like being a sports nut - but as he continues, "not expedient". So, yeah, you can play in the world with its distractions - just do not expect to accomplish much for God.
You gotta love Paul....
It is all in how you live your life.....
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Living Your Life In The Jesus Style
So, Yesfir, has found freedom. Freedom from all the whisperer has to throw at her to defeat her desires to be of service to her Savior. It has not been easy, that is for sure! But, now what?
She poised such an intriguing question; "I have given up who I am, now what?" Christian platitudes are not going to answer that question and honestly I was dumb struck for an answer. It took me a day to arrive at the answer - you fill yourself up with Jesus! Sometimes the obvious just evades me.....
Know Peace.
Your soul is eternal and that abundant life we are told about must start with peace in your heart, soul and mind - else you will only encounter despair in all you pursue in service and perhaps personally as well.
For me, it took me praying about ten times a day for two straight years before I found peace. Tranquility might be a better word here. Inner peace. The knowledge that good or bad, my Savior would still be there, loving me and watching my back.
Jesus is Your Identity.
Whom or what do you really serve? Is the object of the last question, really worth dying for? Is it really worth being at risk, jeopardizing your life, worth losing friends and family over? If you said God or Jesus, are you really sure that He is whom you are really serving? Just figure out your hours in a day and see where they are really spent..... Hint: for most of my Christian friends - the completely honest answer would be sports. Sorrowful but true.
If your answer was Jesus, do you really believe that Philippians 1:24 applies to your life? In other words: are you willing to live, so that you can continue to minister to those whom God has given you responsibility for? Sounds like a weird question but if Heaven is our home, Heaven is where we can find real peace and healing, then why on Earth desire to stick around in a fleshly body? (and I am ignoring the carnal answer of: family, friends, fear, etc.) To live for others, is to be willing to die as Jesus died - only we continue on in our dead Earthly bodies until He calls us home.....
God has given you, whom are mature, a ministry. If not, then you are to be learning, building within yourself that Jesus identity - so that you can get going with your ministry! You are never "too" anything to be of service: too poor, too busy, too unworthy, too broken, too old, too young. Heavens! Do you know that I knew a 9 year old girl whom actually lived her faith and at her memorial there were over 900! Yeah, you can have an impact at even 9, you can have an impact just by living what you can understand in your Bible and then telling others. And trust me, if I am not too broken, neither are you!
Be At Peace With Your Circumstance.
Whether you are rich or poor, free or slave, no matter where you are in life, take comfort in that Jesus has you exactly where He wants you to be! If you are a student, be the best student you can be. If you are a worker, be the best worker you can be. Know that you honor your God just by studying for Him, working for Him, being generous for Him, being honorable in your poverty for Him. Get the idea? Everything is about Him, not you.
Consider Psalm 73:26, in application. If God is our strength and our "allotment", then it stands to reason that: our "abundance" is to be found not in how much we have, but in whom Jesus is. That will involve TRUST, in each of our heart, mind and souls. And trust is difficult, you really can not seek clarity when it comes to trust. You either are willing to have it, or not. No maybe's allowed.
Of course, if you are living in sin, then know that is exactly where Jesus does not want you to be!
Gratitude.
Finally, think on that life lived in a Jesus style. It will not bring fame or fortune, worldly happiness or the good will of others. It will however bring spiritual joy no matter the circumstance (think of Peter in prison!), it will bring you determination (think of Polycarp chained to wild animals), it will bring you satisfaction (as Paul eluded to our ministry as being an Olympic event!).
So we each must have at our core a sense of gratitude towards our Savior for all we have or will have, for all we are or are going to be, for our labors or what we will work at. In a world soaked in sin, gratitude is not a natural reaction to our daily state. But, it is something we can cultivate ..... with His help of course!
She poised such an intriguing question; "I have given up who I am, now what?" Christian platitudes are not going to answer that question and honestly I was dumb struck for an answer. It took me a day to arrive at the answer - you fill yourself up with Jesus! Sometimes the obvious just evades me.....
Know Peace.
Your soul is eternal and that abundant life we are told about must start with peace in your heart, soul and mind - else you will only encounter despair in all you pursue in service and perhaps personally as well.
For me, it took me praying about ten times a day for two straight years before I found peace. Tranquility might be a better word here. Inner peace. The knowledge that good or bad, my Savior would still be there, loving me and watching my back.
Jesus is Your Identity.
Whom or what do you really serve? Is the object of the last question, really worth dying for? Is it really worth being at risk, jeopardizing your life, worth losing friends and family over? If you said God or Jesus, are you really sure that He is whom you are really serving? Just figure out your hours in a day and see where they are really spent..... Hint: for most of my Christian friends - the completely honest answer would be sports. Sorrowful but true.
If your answer was Jesus, do you really believe that Philippians 1:24 applies to your life? In other words: are you willing to live, so that you can continue to minister to those whom God has given you responsibility for? Sounds like a weird question but if Heaven is our home, Heaven is where we can find real peace and healing, then why on Earth desire to stick around in a fleshly body? (and I am ignoring the carnal answer of: family, friends, fear, etc.) To live for others, is to be willing to die as Jesus died - only we continue on in our dead Earthly bodies until He calls us home.....
God has given you, whom are mature, a ministry. If not, then you are to be learning, building within yourself that Jesus identity - so that you can get going with your ministry! You are never "too" anything to be of service: too poor, too busy, too unworthy, too broken, too old, too young. Heavens! Do you know that I knew a 9 year old girl whom actually lived her faith and at her memorial there were over 900! Yeah, you can have an impact at even 9, you can have an impact just by living what you can understand in your Bible and then telling others. And trust me, if I am not too broken, neither are you!
Be At Peace With Your Circumstance.
Whether you are rich or poor, free or slave, no matter where you are in life, take comfort in that Jesus has you exactly where He wants you to be! If you are a student, be the best student you can be. If you are a worker, be the best worker you can be. Know that you honor your God just by studying for Him, working for Him, being generous for Him, being honorable in your poverty for Him. Get the idea? Everything is about Him, not you.
Consider Psalm 73:26, in application. If God is our strength and our "allotment", then it stands to reason that: our "abundance" is to be found not in how much we have, but in whom Jesus is. That will involve TRUST, in each of our heart, mind and souls. And trust is difficult, you really can not seek clarity when it comes to trust. You either are willing to have it, or not. No maybe's allowed.
Of course, if you are living in sin, then know that is exactly where Jesus does not want you to be!
Gratitude.
Finally, think on that life lived in a Jesus style. It will not bring fame or fortune, worldly happiness or the good will of others. It will however bring spiritual joy no matter the circumstance (think of Peter in prison!), it will bring you determination (think of Polycarp chained to wild animals), it will bring you satisfaction (as Paul eluded to our ministry as being an Olympic event!).
So we each must have at our core a sense of gratitude towards our Savior for all we have or will have, for all we are or are going to be, for our labors or what we will work at. In a world soaked in sin, gratitude is not a natural reaction to our daily state. But, it is something we can cultivate ..... with His help of course!
Monday, April 9, 2012
Easter
So, I hope all of my readers out there in Blog-landia, had a great Easter and were mindful of what it really represents. Not sure? Email me and I will be happy to chat about it. Had I the money, I would have bought tee shirts for all in the family that read, "A Jew Died For Me", with our understanding of what a cross might have looked like. Good ole Leonardo Da Vinci was the one whom was tasked with discovering what the cross might have looked like. He had an unlimited supply of prisoners to work with so I imagine that it was a bit gruesome around he hills of Florence for a while.
Manged to round up the entire family for a BBQ. We had gorgeous weather, just perfect for cooking out of doors while the grand kids ran around the yard and hunted Easter Eggs. Yeah, we do eggs for the kids. Surprised? Even first son-in-law came - so it was good to visit with him for a change. Hi current excitement - building a 500 horsepower Ford Probe. I had to laugh, he is so funny, my old Alfa would have eaten his horsepower for breakfast and nothing will ever match Gaelic Girls old Supra. I miss that car.
Today is not going to be fun. My classes in college are all messed up, the school is insisting I drop one class and take something else but I do not see how under the terms of my grant - so we will see....
Be praying for my overcoming this obstacle. And if you are serious about prayer, Gaelic Girl has gone sideways something awful! I have been praying for many weeks now over her decaying sense of reality. She has become quite delusional. Stress? Alzheimer's? Change of Life? Demon possession/oppression? All valid concerns because she can not seem to understand reality any longer. Nor can I follow her train of thought any longer. Then there are the angry tirades. And it breaks my heart.
Manged to round up the entire family for a BBQ. We had gorgeous weather, just perfect for cooking out of doors while the grand kids ran around the yard and hunted Easter Eggs. Yeah, we do eggs for the kids. Surprised? Even first son-in-law came - so it was good to visit with him for a change. Hi current excitement - building a 500 horsepower Ford Probe. I had to laugh, he is so funny, my old Alfa would have eaten his horsepower for breakfast and nothing will ever match Gaelic Girls old Supra. I miss that car.
Today is not going to be fun. My classes in college are all messed up, the school is insisting I drop one class and take something else but I do not see how under the terms of my grant - so we will see....
Be praying for my overcoming this obstacle. And if you are serious about prayer, Gaelic Girl has gone sideways something awful! I have been praying for many weeks now over her decaying sense of reality. She has become quite delusional. Stress? Alzheimer's? Change of Life? Demon possession/oppression? All valid concerns because she can not seem to understand reality any longer. Nor can I follow her train of thought any longer. Then there are the angry tirades. And it breaks my heart.
Friday, April 6, 2012
Politically Correct NIV?
Personally, I love the beauty Luther's translation of the Bible. But for hardcore study, it has got to be the Amplified Bible for me, and preferably a pre-1984 edition. I am not convinced that changes to the Amplified were actually warranted.....
So , now there is a newly updated version of the NIV. The online version can be viewed either at BibleGateway or Biblica.
Please also refer to the translators' notes for the corrections made to the updated version of the NIV by clicking here.
From the translators' notes, I am pleased that several significant corrections and changes have been made, taking into account recent scholarship. But then again, some of what I have found has seemed to be more political in nature than scholarly. Also, some appears to be change for change's sake. I would have to spend much more time doing subject studies to really figure out what the impact to the English believer really is.
Enjoy reading the updated NIV online.And remember that the Amplified is still probably the closest rendering.....
So , now there is a newly updated version of the NIV. The online version can be viewed either at BibleGateway or Biblica.
Please also refer to the translators' notes for the corrections made to the updated version of the NIV by clicking here.
From the translators' notes, I am pleased that several significant corrections and changes have been made, taking into account recent scholarship. But then again, some of what I have found has seemed to be more political in nature than scholarly. Also, some appears to be change for change's sake. I would have to spend much more time doing subject studies to really figure out what the impact to the English believer really is.
Enjoy reading the updated NIV online.And remember that the Amplified is still probably the closest rendering.....
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Miracles I Have Heard
Continuing our discussion, Nolan:
Last time I told you of miracles I have personally witnessed, this time is what has been told to me by those I do believe. Sober, honest men and women whose testimony is solid.
The point is God is active, He is doing big things, He goes unnoticed because even "Christians" do not believe miracles anymore. If you want to see God's hand in action:
Last time I told you of miracles I have personally witnessed, this time is what has been told to me by those I do believe. Sober, honest men and women whose testimony is solid.
- Fleeing attackers, they safely crossed a river, those behind them were devoured by piranaha
- Jail doors opened and no one suddenly around to stop escape
- Next to death, a little girl found and rescued (she later lead her entire family to salvation)
- Police do not arrest a Christian because of "all of the people gathered around him", he was alone
- Police looking for Christian materials can not find them sitting on a seat of a VW bug
- Attempting to discredit a Missionary with a hooker, the hooker and cameraman both come to salvation
- Christian publishing and distribution inside of closed countries
The point is God is active, He is doing big things, He goes unnoticed because even "Christians" do not believe miracles anymore. If you want to see God's hand in action:
- Look globally at disaster and ask, "Is this to call them to Salvation?", then look at sin levels
- Look to see whom does not suffer tragedy in disaster. Hmmmmmm.....
- When you see an accident, consider what kept you too early or too late to have been in it
- Test God and see if he will not provide a miracle around you, you can see and know it is truly Him
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Miracles I Have Seen
So, Nolan, you have asked and I have taken a good first cut at answering your question. Yes, miracles do happen. Yes, God is actively working in your life today. Can you see Him in action? I would be surprised.
In our "scientifically" ordered culture, what can not be recreated must not really exist. If miracles occur, then why are they not repeatable, the skeptic will ask. Well, because is the one whom works the miracle. They are a witnessing tool in reaching the lost. They are a blessing from God for you as His child. But, they are His and He will cause them when and where He desires.
All of these listed below I have personally seen. They happened either to me or my friends, but I was there when they did happen. And no, none of them were "doctors did something" or "it occurred across time". They were instantaneous. Now Kathy's arm I have included because even though it has been across time that the limb has recovered - the recovery did not begin until the class actually prayed for her and those fingers moved for the very first time since the break had occurred months earlier. Remember, the doctors were going to remove her fore arm!
Healings
· A removed eyeball restored new, whole and functional
· Broken bones instantly healed
· Fourth degree burns healed
· Terminal bleeding stopped
· Paralytics regain bodily control and function
· A septic limb, to be amputated, restored
· Muscles restored
· Sprains healed
· Poisoning was not successful
Against Nature
· People whom should have frozen but did not
· Weather changed following prayer
· Sea flow changed following prayer
· A boat, adrift, return to shore immediately
· Wild animals “tamed” (bears and cougars)
· Protection from hypothermia
· Wind given just as needed
Against Physics
· Walking on air
· Melded cars separated
· Future revealed
· Knowledge revealed
· Two solids passing in the same location
· Bullets stopped
· Items appear following prayer
· Seeing the spirit world
· Surviving a 160 foot fall, without injury!
· 135 mpg Dodge Dart
Against Situations
· “Coincidences”
· Existence of Love
· Transportation given, as needed
· Me doing Sunday School!
· Hearts turned
· Attacks averted
· Presence of Angels
· Finding lost divers, while before complete death!
· Finding lost hikers
· Finding lost kids in a forest fire
· Me being a Christian!
· Language ability given as needed
· Language understanding as needed
· “Timing” averts disaster!
· “Seeing” eyes blinded
· “Hearing” ears silenced
· Right people, right place, right time!
· Authority over spiritual opposition
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Know Whom You Are
John 1:5,8
Matthew 11:11
You Are Not God
The contrast between John, the baptizer and Jesus is distinct.
John is not being put down, he is being allowed to lift Jesus up!
You Are Whom God Made You To Be
We are all wired differently, but we all have the same purpose to point to Jesus and glorify Him with our lives!
We must learn to be TOTALLY for each other and COMPLETELY who God made us each to be!
You Are Sent By God
You are to shine, not with your own light but with the reflected glow from God.
Jesus is the Light!
You Have The Same Resources John did!
You are to prepare the way of the Lord.
We each have a faith story.
You have the promise of God, He will show up!
Matthew 11:11
You Are Not God
The contrast between John, the baptizer and Jesus is distinct.
John is not being put down, he is being allowed to lift Jesus up!
You Are Whom God Made You To Be
We are all wired differently, but we all have the same purpose to point to Jesus and glorify Him with our lives!
We must learn to be TOTALLY for each other and COMPLETELY who God made us each to be!
You Are Sent By God
You are to shine, not with your own light but with the reflected glow from God.
Jesus is the Light!
You Have The Same Resources John did!
You are to prepare the way of the Lord.
We each have a faith story.
You have the promise of God, He will show up!
Monday, April 2, 2012
Fouled Up
If Kris, Then FOUL.UP
This little statement seems to be motto of my life. Yeah, I managed to get the State through the process of getting my grant money handled - AFTER 30 months! Then surprise, it is all fouled up again 3 weeks later! It is so extremely frustrating having to deal with people so completely clueless in life!
So there I am trying to buy books for school which starts today and just like last quarter, empty accounts! Sigh. It took all of ten minutes to find the problem and solve it but the person whom then enters the data on their computer had taken the day off - the day before quarter begins! - so no one could enter the corrections! What level of idiocy allows people to take days off, the day before a major event, when the demands upon their job are going to be the greatest?
Of course this could not be the end of the 'Then FOUL.UP' for the weekend. But, pretty much I seemed to have been jumped on by most people. So bizarre.
But, then I have to remember that my life right now is one of Spiritual Warfare and of course there will be a many personal attacks and inconveniences as possible during this time! It just gets really old though. When you can see God's hand so clearly displayed - and no one else can - well you must be the problem, not those whom can not see Him working. When every single person in my family goes off on me, I am the problem not the crowd whom is attacking. One could almost reach a position of giving up, but then again, that is what the Opposition wants - New Daughter to continue in bondage, not to find freedom. And if I am all that stands in the way of her not finding freedom, then I guess I am going to get smacked around pretty good.
Of course, I am German and the greater the opposition, the deeper my heels go straight down into the ground! Must be a character flaw of sorts!
This little statement seems to be motto of my life. Yeah, I managed to get the State through the process of getting my grant money handled - AFTER 30 months! Then surprise, it is all fouled up again 3 weeks later! It is so extremely frustrating having to deal with people so completely clueless in life!
So there I am trying to buy books for school which starts today and just like last quarter, empty accounts! Sigh. It took all of ten minutes to find the problem and solve it but the person whom then enters the data on their computer had taken the day off - the day before quarter begins! - so no one could enter the corrections! What level of idiocy allows people to take days off, the day before a major event, when the demands upon their job are going to be the greatest?
Of course this could not be the end of the 'Then FOUL.UP' for the weekend. But, pretty much I seemed to have been jumped on by most people. So bizarre.
But, then I have to remember that my life right now is one of Spiritual Warfare and of course there will be a many personal attacks and inconveniences as possible during this time! It just gets really old though. When you can see God's hand so clearly displayed - and no one else can - well you must be the problem, not those whom can not see Him working. When every single person in my family goes off on me, I am the problem not the crowd whom is attacking. One could almost reach a position of giving up, but then again, that is what the Opposition wants - New Daughter to continue in bondage, not to find freedom. And if I am all that stands in the way of her not finding freedom, then I guess I am going to get smacked around pretty good.
Of course, I am German and the greater the opposition, the deeper my heels go straight down into the ground! Must be a character flaw of sorts!
Sunday, April 1, 2012
Musical Saturday Morning
I have always had a fondness for both Fleetwood Mac and in particular Stevie Nicks. I also have to admit to never having bought one of their albums, from even a second hand store! Yeah, although I really like their music, something just not add up right about her.....
It was 1981, I was in Phoenix at the time and I came face to face with her. First, my attention was drawn to her just by the sheer mass of body guards with her. Next, she is incredibly short, even in her spiked platforms! Of course, I was still 6'5" back then so that probably accentuated her shortness. And then there was her attitude, which oozed out every pore of her body. And attitude which said, "Hey world, something is really wrong with me!" And now due to daughter I understand the rest of that sentence, ".....does anyone really care enough to help me?".
I stumbled on my way, out of the path of the massive men pushing her along. But as our eyes met, I guess I could not understand the fear in those eyes..... No not like she would have said boo to me, but she was obviously calling out for help, from anyone, even from the skinny computer nerd, too dumb to understand - and not exactly certain whom she was until later that night.
She has had so many hits in the 1980's it is hard to pick a favorite, so I went with one where clothing was modest for her, the lyrics are neutral and still a good song.....
It was 1981, I was in Phoenix at the time and I came face to face with her. First, my attention was drawn to her just by the sheer mass of body guards with her. Next, she is incredibly short, even in her spiked platforms! Of course, I was still 6'5" back then so that probably accentuated her shortness. And then there was her attitude, which oozed out every pore of her body. And attitude which said, "Hey world, something is really wrong with me!" And now due to daughter I understand the rest of that sentence, ".....does anyone really care enough to help me?".
I stumbled on my way, out of the path of the massive men pushing her along. But as our eyes met, I guess I could not understand the fear in those eyes..... No not like she would have said boo to me, but she was obviously calling out for help, from anyone, even from the skinny computer nerd, too dumb to understand - and not exactly certain whom she was until later that night.
She has had so many hits in the 1980's it is hard to pick a favorite, so I went with one where clothing was modest for her, the lyrics are neutral and still a good song.....
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