Fleeces

I stood at a fork in the road of my life.  If I went to the right – I would be working in computers for probably the rest of my life and the required rigor came very naturally to me.  If I went to the left – I would remain in the ministry.  Which way should I go?  I was completely clueless and not finding God giving me much in the way of direction!  So, I had been reading about Gideon and decided to lay a fleece.

As you might remember Gideon had to make a decision as well, so he prayed that a fleece he laid would either be wet or dry and the surrounding area the opposite across two consecutive nights.  This proved to him what he should do (follow God’s leading of course!).

Well, if it worked for Gideon, it ought to work for me, right?  I knew in my heart the road I really wanted to travel but I wanted to know if it was the one God would have me to take.  So, I prayed and laid a fleece.  God confirmed the path.

Seven times I prayed and the fleece was confirmed each time.  I was very excited!

So, I told my Bible study group about it and they were a little blown away by someone actually doing something like that.  I was scolded quite briskly by my mentor for not trusting God enough to follow my heart…..  (Danger Will Robinson!!!!!)

Next weekend, one of my friends told me he decided to do the same.  Seems he had an eye for a young lady and decided to lay a fleece as to whether or not she would be his.  It would have been a miracle for him to get a no answer, given the way he laid the fleece!  When I told him that, he was so angry at me – he stopped the car and told me to get out!  So, I ended up walking many miles that morning to church.

By the time I had gotten to church, everything was in an uproar because he announced that he was going to marry this young lady, whom of course might have liked to have been consulted first!  What a mess!  It took a few years to let that one pass over.  Eventually he did apologize for tossing me out the car on the freeway, but he never gave up his obsession that she would be his one day.

I stopped laying fleeces after that.  I guess I had learned how fickle our desires really are and trusting in God to lead me was far more important.  Besides, I already had my answer.

Yes or No?

Last time I wrote on Fleeces and how I had found my answer, then to observe my close brother in the Lord totally make a fool of himself through the same process!  But, I did have my answer and I was happy.  I loved being a youth minister; maybe one day even moving up into the pastor’s role – after finishing theology school of course.  It was the only job I have ever completely loved and wanted.  But, it was not to be.

Yes, I lost that job very shortly after this whole Fleece problem had cropped up.  How could God have given me seven ‘Yes’s and then I would lose my ministry position?  I had no doubt this was His will – yet, in the back of my mind I had to wonder what was going on!

Most every situation should have a ‘Yes’ or ‘No’ answer, at least in my mind.  But, what I have found was that often God does not answer the way we expect.  A ‘No’ answer could be a ‘Wait’ or a ‘No’.  A ‘Yes’ could be a yes for now, but not for later.  A ‘No’ could be for now or forever. 

Do you think of the silly situations you can get yourself into by trying to out guess God?  Gideon only asked about one task God had already told him about, I was trying to get direction for a life time – something God had not told me about!  God had me where he wanted me for that point in my life but shortly that was all about to change.  God was about to test me, God was about to test my fiancée, God was about to test my new in-laws, God was about to test my friends and my family.  (And admittedly we all failed.)

So, I now wait upon the Lord.  Watching for open doors and closed doors.  And by all means, keeping my fingers out of those door ways – just in case they get slammed shut!  I have spiritually gnarly fingers from all of the breakage…..

I no longer ask for a sign, I ask for His will to become so plainly known that even I can see the path He would have me follow.  If I do not see a path, I do nothing.  If an opportunity appears but I sense God has not prodded me in that direction, I do nothing.  Yes, I do a lot of nothing!  But, then I do know where He has me and what He has me doing, and that I pursue whole heartedly – at least until directed elsewhere.