A New 2014 Goal

I was a mess on Monday.  I was utterly shattered on the inside.  Thursday through Sunday had been mighty hard, trying to deal with someone whom is apparently mentally ill, living in a location from which mental health care can not be forced on others, well - everyone is going to be damaged around that person.

Monday, I had nothing left.  I knew what I needed to do and prepare for, however God seemed to have other priorities.  I found I needed to gather together all of my financial records and it was impressed upon me was that they needed to be destroyed.  Okay, maybe I am going insane here, but they really have no value to me, so I burned them.  Yeah, I kept the stuff needed for tax reporting.  Then went back to working on Gaelic Girl's dead car.  And honestly, I was wondering if something was wrong with my mind ...

But, I needed to get a hose that is not available, so I ordered one from the local parts store.  In the mean time GG had returned and was beating her head with the bathroom room while screaming.  Yeah, as I said, mentally ill.  So, I moved on to making an easy dinner of tacos - her favorite.

After dinner, GG then demanded all of the financial records from me and I thought how utterly bizarre!  What are the odds?  So she spent the night working on proving that I am stealing money from her - only to discover that I have been using 100% of my royalty payments to supplement her income to retain her house for a year now. She exploded!  It was not what she wanted to find!

And this then lead to a two hour lecture from her on all of my character flaws (oh I have flaws, but apparently she does not even know about them!) and told me I need to leave because from her standpoint, it is over.  I am not sure what "it" is here, everything died long ago.

I just sat there and thought to myself, if I had kept those receipts she would know that I do spent a little bit a month on me - about $50, sometimes $100 a month, which does not seem unreasonable in my mind.  But, God seems to have protected me and frustrated her evil desires to justify herself.  I was awed and still do wonder what the full implications are, God rarely seems to have me do something weird without a much larger purpose.

For me, over the weekend I had already reconciled myself to knowing I need to sell off virtually everything I own in order to end debt to the US IRS for taxes in 2012 and now what I owe for 2013, end my short term debt I have lived with from father's funeral in 2010, then I need a small van or truck.  I do not know if I can raise that kind of money but certainly I can get closer to $0 in debt and have a car to live in at least.  Then GG can refinance to a much lower mortgage and go into 2015 able to pay her own way without me.

So apparently I have a goal in 2014, get out of GG's life ...
Sigh ...