So, Yesfir, has found freedom. Freedom from all the whisperer has to throw at her to defeat her desires to be of service to her Savior. It has not been easy, that is for sure! But, now what?
She poised such an intriguing question; "I have given up who I am, now what?" Christian platitudes are not going to answer that question and honestly I was dumb struck for an answer. It took me a day to arrive at the answer - you fill yourself up with Jesus! Sometimes the obvious just evades me.....
Know Peace.
Your soul is eternal and that abundant life we are told about must start with peace in your heart, soul and mind - else you will only encounter despair in all you pursue in service and perhaps personally as well.
For me, it took me praying about ten times a day for two straight years before I found peace. Tranquility might be a better word here. Inner peace. The knowledge that good or bad, my Savior would still be there, loving me and watching my back.
Jesus is Your Identity.
Whom or what do you really serve? Is the object of the last question, really worth dying for? Is it really worth being at risk, jeopardizing your life, worth losing friends and family over? If you said God or Jesus, are you really sure that He is whom you are really serving? Just figure out your hours in a day and see where they are really spent..... Hint: for most of my Christian friends - the completely honest answer would be sports. Sorrowful but true.
If your answer was Jesus, do you really believe that Philippians 1:24 applies to your life? In other words: are you willing to live, so that you can continue to minister to those whom God has given you responsibility for? Sounds like a weird question but if Heaven is our home, Heaven is where we can find real peace and healing, then why on Earth desire to stick around in a fleshly body? (and I am ignoring the carnal answer of: family, friends, fear, etc.) To live for others, is to be willing to die as Jesus died - only we continue on in our dead Earthly bodies until He calls us home.....
God has given you, whom are mature, a ministry. If not, then you are to be learning, building within yourself that Jesus identity - so that you can get going with your ministry! You are never "too" anything to be of service: too poor, too busy, too unworthy, too broken, too old, too young. Heavens! Do you know that I knew a 9 year old girl whom actually lived her faith and at her memorial there were over 900! Yeah, you can have an impact at even 9, you can have an impact just by living what you can understand in your Bible and then telling others. And trust me, if I am not too broken, neither are you!
Be At Peace With Your Circumstance.
Whether you are rich or poor, free or slave, no matter where you are in life, take comfort in that Jesus has you exactly where He wants you to be! If you are a student, be the best student you can be. If you are a worker, be the best worker you can be. Know that you honor your God just by studying for Him, working for Him, being generous for Him, being honorable in your poverty for Him. Get the idea? Everything is about Him, not you.
Consider Psalm 73:26, in application. If God is our strength and our "allotment", then it stands to reason that: our "abundance" is to be found not in how much we have, but in whom Jesus is. That will involve TRUST, in each of our heart, mind and souls. And trust is difficult, you really can not seek clarity when it comes to trust. You either are willing to have it, or not. No maybe's allowed.
Of course, if you are living in sin, then know that is exactly where Jesus does not want you to be!
Gratitude.
Finally, think on that life lived in a Jesus style. It will not bring fame or fortune, worldly happiness or the good will of others. It will however bring spiritual joy no matter the circumstance (think of Peter in prison!), it will bring you determination (think of Polycarp chained to wild animals), it will bring you satisfaction (as Paul eluded to our ministry as being an Olympic event!).
So we each must have at our core a sense of gratitude towards our Savior for all we have or will have, for all we are or are going to be, for our labors or what we will work at. In a world soaked in sin, gratitude is not a natural reaction to our daily state. But, it is something we can cultivate ..... with His help of course!
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