The Great Gummi Bear Hunt

Friday evening was a perfect time for shooting. No wind, no sun, light overcast, no rain. Also almost no one else at the range! I set a target at 100m with 5 gummi bears attached to a piece of 10mm plywood and settled down.

First shot was for sighting, it was good.

Second shot tagged a gummi's right ear.

Third shot tagged another gummi's right ear.

Fourth shot blew the head off of the gummi. But, that was not all.

It took me about 10 minutes to find the headless gummi bear. It had been blown sideways to the target. In person you can see where the head has been cleanly severed by the bullet for about 2/3 the thickness of the gummi. However, the remaining 1/3 is raggedly torn backwards.

I am still waiting for a call from my physics friend, but it appears that the gelatin in the gummi bears, under great pressure - such as a 50gr bullet moving at over 4,000 feet per second, creates an explosive force! Yes, just the head of the gummi blew a 6cm hole through the plywood!

Go figure.........

Remarriage

It has amazed me the sheer numbers of remarried Christian couples I have encountered. It is horrible to realize that statistically 50% of Christian marriages will end in divorce, it is worse to realize how little concern is expressed when the Christian then remarries. But, this is what I wish to explore this time around.

When your spouse dies, Paul encourages you to remarry, particularly if you are young. You don’t have to, but Paul saw no problems with your doing so.

When your spouse has left you – either through abandonment or divorce, Paul tells us to remain single in hopes of reconciling with one another.

However, in Paul’s day, it was not unusual for the husband to abandon his first wife and marry a younger woman. Notice that I did not say divorce! Yah, if the man were to have divorced his wife, he would have to return the dowry – which he may not have wanted to do or been able to afford to do. So he would just “lose” her and go his merry way finding the next Misses.

What did Paul say to do then? You still needed your divorce paperwork, the return of your dowry and if your spouse had remarried, you were free to remarry since they had broken the covenant.

You are also not to remarry an ex-spouse if they have married someone since leaving you!

But, I look and I see a great many Christians whom are marrying divorced Christians, whose spouses are still single. Heavens, I know of Christian couples whom divorced so they could marry or at least "date" others! So, it is obvious the Church no longer understands the point of marriage is to stay committed to one and only one spouse! The lack of discretion in performing these ceremonies, exhibited by the Church, only strengthens the concept that marriage really is not as important as it should be to us!

Marriage has to be a sacred joining since God uses the image of Christ and the Church as being like a groom and bride. Unless someone wants to argue Christ is not committed to the Church or maybe only until He gets tired of our unfaithfulness, I would be hesitant to argue marriage is subject to the whims of man or culture.

If you have divorced, the only one you should be seeking in marriage is your ex-spouse. And, yes, you may well have to “pay” heavily both emotionally and mentally for what you have done. Grow up, get into prayer, get your life into order, buy some flowers and start begging for forgiveness. That goes both ways here……no matter your gender.

If you have remarried unbiblically, what are you to do? Well, you don’t run out and get a divorce that is for sure! Paul tells us we are to remain married to them, so they maybe blessed by God, through His blessing of you. You probably will get to do a little evangelism in your household. (Good luck! Talk about a soft sell........)

God tells us He will bless the joining of two people. He will bless your marriage, but you may just not have the fullness of the blessing you might have had otherwise nor as active a witness. You also have the complications of living with the outcome of your previous marriage – children, financial obligations, the ex-spouse’s need for council, your memories, your loss of trust, anger issues, etc. An awful lot can get in the way of your happiness in a remarriage!

Divorce and remarriage is not an easy process and a bit dicey if you want to remain a Biblical Christian. Don’t compromise your testimony. Marry with the greatest of caution. Do not play the world's games - stay out of divorce court - even if you are miserable. Remain faithful to your first spouse until there is no hope of reconciliation due to their remarriage or death. Then the choice is yours – remain faithful to the vow you took or remarry, as it is in the Lord’s will - not yours!

Divorce In The Church

I admit I may have a prejudice on this topic, my parents divorced when I was 17. My wife’s family divorced the same year. Most of my friends have experienced one or more divorces in their families through the years. Divorce is an evil that is eating at the core of the Christian family – and only you can do something about it!

If you stuck with the concept of marriage within your faith, you are on better ground than those whom have not. Their marriages will probably end in divorce long before you run into struggles, but everyone will eventually run into problems in their marriage. If you never were able to learn the difference between love and infatuation, you are already on the wrong path for a long term marriage. When problems arise, they can be devastating when your marriage is based upon the wrong grounds. It might be year three or year thirty. Heavens I know one couple whom divorced after 55 years of marriage! (Never did understand that one!)

In America , you just need to have “differences” in order to file for a divorce. It used to be you had to at least have an actual cause for a divorce and even then the court had to actually think through the process to see if any chance of reconciliation was possible. Today, “Your breath smells bad in the morning!” is sufficient grounds - and you are out of there……

We are told God allows for divorce due to the hardness of our hearts. Yah, not something your spouse did, but the unloving and unforgiving nature of your own heart. And what was the Biblical basis for divorce?

Abandonment – usually man leaves, woman may pursue through court action to get her “letter” of divorce – freeing her from this commitment.

Virginity – woman was not a virgin on the wedding night, nothing to do with the her and her husband’s indiscretion prior to the marriage.

Yah, you will hear different versions of this from your pastor or in 'Christian' books, but sorry – those are all we have to work with from the early Jewish documents and our Bible. Everything else is just unsupportable wishful thinking. So, if you believe adultery or brutality or financial failure or whatever else you can think of is a valid Biblical reason for your divorce, you have been misled – like so many others.

So any exceptions here? Yah, one really big one that is a problem in our culture today – if you have had premarital sex with your spouse – you may not under any condition divorce them. You can holler no fair all you want, but that is what the Bible teaches……..

I will completely agree with you that adultery is just about unforgivable, but it was not given in scripture as an example for divorce. It was an example for stoning though….. (Hmmmm, one could argue from logic here, since adultery no longer carries a death sentence in our culture, that divorce is the reasonable alternative. But, I would hesitate to out guess God on this one.)

I completely agree with you that God did not create your spouse, nor you, to be the object of physical abuse. In the Middle East , your family had another way of caring for this, other than divorce, but the quest of this blog is not to advocate other forms of violence…..

So, you are the victim of a marriage gone awry – what are you to do?

First, I am very impressed with the “Boundary” series of books; there are boundaries for most relationship situations – marriage, dating, kids, etc. I don’t agree with everything they will tell you – as they are heavily culturally saturated, but they are a place from which to start at controlling your relationships with others around you. Mostly the ideas seem Biblical and/or reasonable (I would wish more on the Biblical end though!).

Second, most churches offer counseling or have older couples whom are be willing to lend an ear and some sage advice from their years of marriage. If nothing else – they offer prayer – and prayer does change things – often your own viewpoint. If none of this available through your church – time to move to a real church!

Third, understand you may need to separate legally, until such time as your spouse can get their act together and prove to you their change and desire to reunite as a couple. This will offer some protection to you in the event of violence or sexual misconduct. You may truly need this protection as well. You may even need to completely change your life-job-town, in order to protect yourself should your spouse go completely psycho (if they can not find you, you will be safe). But, resolving your issues is very difficult this way. This is not an easy area to advise on!

And you need to understand, that in no case has anyone whom has done this for over a year, that I know of, had their marriage survive. Inevitably, the wrongful spouse decides to go the divorce route and then within 3 years finds out how messed up they really are and wants to come back – to a very cold reception. It is amazing how consistently these situations work out!

But, the big point here is: if you call yourself a Christian you should not initiate a divorce! Even if you are abandoned, you can still file for separation and live your life as a single – albeit – married Christian. Yah, maybe you can justify to yourself that you deserve love, etc and should remarry. But, you know, the Bible does not agree with you. In hunting terms, you get one lifetime tag for a spouse – you blow it – you have used your tag and that is the end of the conversation…………..

Makes you want to be a little more careful, eh?

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So in wrap up:

• Divorce is almost unsupportable Biblically.
• You both need to understand boundaries in your marriage.
• When problems arise, you don’t keep them secret, you seek prayer and counsel.
• The point of any difficulty is to resolve your problems!
• In the rare case, separation may be required to work though your problems.
• The point of separation is to get back together as a couple!
• You must be transparent enough to share your testimony with others…….

The Myth of the Promiscuous Virgin

Yes, my attacks against our sex saturated culture continues, especially with its impact upon the Church and its youth. If you want to feel condemned, read on.

Probably some of the worse advice I have ever heard was during a church staff meeting a decade ago. One of the staff had been corresponding with someone from her high school for years and now he was graduating from College and wanted her to come out for the ceremony and to see if ….well maybe…..there was something there. Her question: if things got “sticky”, how far was too far?

The unanimous answer: your body is your own and you have say over what you are willing to do or not do with someone whom you are looking for in a marriage partner.

GASP! Do you get the implications here? The overwhelming opinion amongst the Christian leaders present was that your sexual desires/preference/performance was a matter of willingness – with no hint of sin! Has the church moved so far from the Bible that there is now an expectation of sexual misconduct amongst it own staff members? I was floored and had a separate talk with the young lady, where I at least outlined God’s expectations……… And I think she was a little relieved I did so.

Obviously, the culture exerts an enormous amount of pressure upon each of us and our youth in the church, especially in the realm of sexual experimentation. And the youth gladly buy into any idea which will allow their raging hormones to run wild and not associate any wrong doing with them. No wonder we have problems as outlined in yesterday’s blog.

Young men, heaven’s any man, do you ever remember reading a passage where you are told not to defraud your brother? Have you ever wondered what this meant? It is not a reference to being honest when selling your car, although a good idea, it refers to your inappropriate activities with members of the opposite sex, whom are not your spouse. You have NO RIGHT to touch any woman sexually, whom is not already your spouse. In other words you keep your hands and other parts to yourself with every woman because they are not yours. If you do decide, what the heck, and just have a “little” fun, you have just defrauded your brother in Christ. You have taken something which in God’s legal terms belongs to the man this woman will one day marry – and it probably will not be you.

And I see and hear of this occurring constantly. Which is where the title comes from for this blog entry. Virgin defines more than just a female it means you men and your minds as well. Our culture tells us that sex begins when you commit the “act”. Hmmm, my Bible tells me to even took on a woman in lust is to have already committed adultery with her. In God’s terms: looking, lusting, petting, etc, etc, etc are all sexual acts. You sin, no matter how you want to justify it.

How promiscuous have you been, thinking that God really does not care and you have the only say in these matters?

God calls you to sexual purity. His idea is that you are a virgin when you marry, not just someone whom has not “gone all the way”. I would even wish my spouse’s first kiss was mine. It can be done and we know God requires of us nothing which is not possible if we have the faith to perform what He asks of us, but also do not allow ourselves to get into situations where things can get out of control sexually.

So, we have a call to strength from God. If you can not keep your zipper up young men because God told you to, or even out of respect for yourself – God tells you to consider this woman is another man’s property. Have respect for the man of this woman’s future! Young women, this goes for you as well. Do not let yourselves be pressured into situations you know in your heart are wrong. This hot guy, probably will be marrying someone else and he is not yours. You will not be making him yours by having sex with him; instead, you may end up complicating your life something awful.

Ok, so you have been a promiscuous virgin, or just promiscuous, this is your call to change! Repent of your behavior to God, name names, get personal with God – He knows it all anyways, He just wants you to agree with Him. End relationships which are currently a problem in this area of your life. Go to group dating only or chaperoned so you will not behave poorly. You might think this foolishness but God has reasons behind everything he desires for us. Even if you get engaged – stay safe and sane – chaperoned events do not have to be intrusive or obvious or embarrassing!

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We have a God whom specializes in making all hidden things known in the lives of those whom would be called by his name. You may think you are getting away with something – but God will see that it gets known and through the most embarrassing of manners. Unexpected pregnancies, disease, unexpected visitors at awkward moments, etc – all are easily within the realm of God attempting to correct you and get you back into line with what He expects from you. I see it all the time…..

Young men like to talk and brag, they do it without regard as to their environment or extended audience. I can go to the local Denny’s, have a slice of pie with tea any afternoon, when school is out, and listen to the guys from the local high school regaling each other with tales of their conquests. Unfortunately, I often know the young women involved in these tales. I feel sorry for them because they have no idea at how they are being used and the terms being used to describe them. I feel also for the young men when they desire to “date” one of my daughters because I am not beyond openly discussing their sexual “conquests” with in front of the daughter they expect to date!

I already know what their desires really are and they need to know I know……..

There Is Hope - Tales of Four Couples

Well, we have beaten to death the concept of non-Christian dating and marriage! But, lest you have lost heart I want to share the stories of four contemporary couples whom did make it – from idealistic to less so….

For most idealistic – I choose Caleb. He was interested in a girl in his high school and went to her father, asking him to allow him to date her and followed ALL of the rules. Even when they went off to the same college, he would still call the girl’s father and ask if it was ok to take her out, as well as, a return call to let him know all was well. Wow! As a parent, I want this guy for my daughter! In fact, I had sort of hoped….. :^(

Many years later they were to marry and what a testimony they have brought into the Christian community! Yes, you can live by rules and not hormones. Yes, you can work with parents and still have fun. Wow! They are currently honeymooning in Mexico I am told.

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Now I will pick on Josiah. You have no idea how much I like this young man, he has that indescribable quality that says, “I am going somewhere!”. A born leader, an observant follower, with a bit of a rebel streak in him. He liked our Sunday school class enough; he started bringing his girlfriend, whom then started coming regularly. I was surprised years later to find out her father was a pastor and it really was a big deal for her to be attending our class.

But, back to them. One day, we were having a group discussion about dating and I was voicing my concerns over the youth of today – from what I observed in our own church. Out of nowhere, she says, “Actually, Josiah and I have never even held hands much less kissed. We want our first kiss to be at the altar.” Whoa! The other young women all looked at her like she was crazy, but we used her to have a talk with the high school girls later on about dating. What a testimony!

Like my first example, they too married, in what had to be one of the most humorous of ceremonies ever – and a reception involving a trampoline. I thought I was going to be sick I was laughing so hard! Of course, us old ones usually are forgotten by the young ones – until something comes up they can’t handle. So, they must be doing well.

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One of the most expressive young women I have ever met was Cindy. She was short, with flaming red hair and an outspoken witness for Christ. She also was extremely outspoken about Bud being her husband. Bud was a few years older, an elder and unfortunately for Cindy – had no interest in her at all. Bud dated everybody, was engaged at least three times and Cindy was constantly in a state of trauma over how stupid “her man” was! Yah, I heard all about it, often. I may even have hearing loss from a few of those sessions!

I can remember one campout in particular we had on the Washington coast. Bud, standing in the background, was leading a Bible study; several of us were gathered around a fire several hundred feet away. Cindy sat with her back to him, not by design, so if you looked at her, you were also looking at Bud. Bud had just announced, yet again, another engagement, this time to Sheila – blonde and devastating. Cindy was outraged.

We were praying with her and attempting to offer comfort, when she turned her face towards heaven and in a rage screamed, “I am really angry with you God!”, all the while shaking one of her little fists at the sky. Were it not so unexpected, it might have been humorous! She then collapsed into tears for the rest of the night. Bud never had clue.

Ok, process check here. Bud obviously was either mistaking his hormones or infatuation for God’s leading concerning the spouse he was seeking. He was a great man of the Word and we just could not understand how someone so obviously in touch with God, could be so blind as to how he was blocking God’s leading in this one area of his life. But, then he liked blondes, not redheads. He liked modeling material, not normal.

Yah, like all of the others, Sheila literally left him at the altar and he was destroyed. Guess who was still there waiting to pick up the pieces? Yah, Cindy. They did get married sometime later, he had to learn a few things about love, Cindy already knew, and as far as I know have lived happily ever after. (Actually, I would have made Bud suffer a little here for the years of torment……)

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And now for Tracy , I had a real love-hate relationship with this guy. On the one hand, he was my boss and I was sort of in training under his watchful eye at church. I loved my job and he was very supportive. On the other, he was a macho egotist whom I don’t think really liked his wife at all. I would be forced to just bite my tongue (I have the scars to prove it!). Were I older, I probably would have smacked him upside the head or at least spoken my mind – but I was afraid of losing my job. Our relationship was not very friendly once I really knew him.

Over the three years I knew him and his wife, I was to learn that almost no aspect of his life was reasonable. But, his wife stood behind him when a normal person would have cut and run long ago. She loved him, he obviously had been infatuated with her when they married and was now looking for a way out. I would read and reread my Bible nightly trying to understand him and be just unable to reconcile the Word with his life. I was a new Christian and it simply made no sense to me! Could a Christian not be a Christian?

And this is why, even though married I picked him as an example. This Christian young lady had obviously married a “Christian”. He knew the language and could even pretend for short periods of time to be one. But, he wasn’t. I doubt she was actually fooled in her heart, but she had allowed her self to marry outside of her faith, and she knew she made excuses for him, in order for him to be acceptable to her first. And she really reaped the whirlwind, let me tell you!

And then, I was to witness God moving in his life, the most frightful thing there is to see. Tracy ’s business – a personal pride and joy for him and actually a fairly safe money generator, unexpectedly went into bankruptcy. It surprised him about as much as anyone in the Church. This caused the financial ruin of many of his family and friends across the next several months. Of course, those in the church immediately stepped in to begin condemning him and his lifestyle. As for his wife? She stuck by him through what had to literally be the most miserable experience possible for anyone. Utter humiliation, treated with nothing but contempt and everyone telling her to save herself and get a separation at the minimum! (Yah, God was not exactly the “god” of that church…..)

Then one day, about a year later, his eyes were opened and he suddenly could see everything clearly - that he was a miserable human being, much less a “christian” and he owed his wife more than he could ever repay in this lifetime. He repented big time, and with his wife - this time at his side, set forth upon an entirely new life together dedicated to sharing their lives and worshipping God. Let me tell you I will never forget them standing up before the church one Sunday evening as they gave a testimony about all of the above.

Gees, it still chokes me up!

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Not all mismatches end so well. There are way too many Tracy ’s out there preying upon Christian young women. Most of these disasters will end in divorce. Most involve a young head strong girl marrying a “christian” or non-Christian man, whom may not even be a good pretender. Usually this is done against the advice of everyone whom really loves that girl, though she will not listen because the “world” is against her love for this guy. But, that really does not help her with the future choices she will now have to face and never would have been so – if she had listened to the council of her elders, family and friends.

Best bet – stay safe – stay sane – still within your faith!!!!!!!!

(“Tracy” and “Cindy”, you know whom you really are, if you read this, drop a note…….!)

Unequally Yoked

This is a bad example, but:

Let us say your father tosses you the keys to the car, hands you a twenty and asks you to drive over to the
local burger joint and pick him up a burger – mustard and pickles only. He has given you everything you
need, told you what to do, so there should be no problem – right?

You leave and come back with his request: a chicken sub sandwich. Hey, it is healthier for him right?  Hmmm, but not quite what was asked for though……

Same idea is behind the question of Christians looking for their spouses. If you are a Christian, Paul tells you to marry another Christian. How come? Well, think about the long term problems of being married to a non-Christian - your spouse will:

    * Not want to go to church with you.
    * Will not understand giving much less tithing.
    * Will not be able, nor want to, discuss the Bible with you.
    * Will die and go to Hell.
    * Will not agree to your child raising ideas.
    * Will not agree as to kinds of friends.
    * Will not agree as to kinds of activities.
    * Will not pray with you.
    * Will be in your face over your petty beliefs.
    * Truly will not understand the concept of faith.
    * Will bring you down to their level.

So, if being in a constant state of warfare is your idea of marriage, you will have what you seek, because
you married a non-Christian. And you can expect a looming divorce in your future. It is not a guarantee
– but you should start expecting it now – before you get married, because it is coming.

Yah, I know, your marriage will be the one exception…..

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Paul is being far from unreasonable when he tells you, as a Christian, to marry a Christian. He understood the power of shared prayer, shared study, shared faith. He knew that for true “oneness” to occur, you had to both have the same basis of life - Christianity.

So many women I have known and know today, plus one guy, just do not understand this one simple verse from Paul. Blame hormones (“He/She is so hot!”), a coddling society that allows its young the freedom to perform stupid acts (“Hey, they can get it right the next time around!”), or even an educational system dedicated to destroying your child’s belief through logic (apparently burger does equal chicken sandwich!).

No matter where you wish to fix blame – the problem is today’s Christian. They don’t really see the relevance of the Bible today. It has some great stories and good ideas, but it just does not work in a world ruled by your hormonal needs that demand satisfaction – ‘now’.  After all, the Bible is 2,000 years old and was written to a different people, with less of an education than you have, in a very different setting, and it does have some translation problems anyways.  Sound familiar?

Like it or not, believe it or not, want it or not – your opinion really has no validity here: the Bible is the standard by which you are going to be judged. No, you are not going to go to Hell because you married a non-Christian – you just may think you have arrived there after a few years in that marriage though. And it is not as if Christian marriages don’t have problems – they do, but if both hearts are sold out to God, there are at least a few recourses they can turn
to in order to settle differences – building an even stronger marriage in the process – before complicating their lives with a divorce.

And, I offer this: if you want to have God’s blessing in your marriage and life, it is not going to happen the way it could have, when you marry that special somebody, whom is so hot, and will become a Christian later ("you just know it!"). No, in all of the cases I can think of, not a one of them became Christians after the marriage. No standard was applied to them before marriage, so no standard would apply afterwards as well. With one exception, all ended in divorce.  With two exceptions, none made it past 3 years even.

So, as I opened with - if divorce is what you want in your life, go ahead and marry that non Christian. You will be getting exactly what you want and are asking for. Heck, in the end, you can always blame God anyways, right?

Except, you should have known better, because you have already been told - 2,000 years ago! Just pick up The Book and start living your ‘faith’! It is not as hard as you think.....

Siblings, Infatuation and Love

I will admit that I am a watcher. I watch people; I observe what they are doing and hopefully am around long enough to see what happens. In my singles days, I would go to the airport and just sit and watch people. It was fascinating! I learned a great deal from this about human nature and what leads from the best of intentions to utter disaster. That doesn’t make me all knowing, just weird, with a good idea about life and what is going on. I am the bane of my children’s attempts at rebellion – I can see it coming and usually mitigate an out for them. That doesn’t mean they still will not insist on being stupid…….

People are either attracted or repelled by one another, it happens constantly, to each of us as we meet new people or even begin to know someone whom has been around us for a while but we never noticed before.

“Love” – that emotional state my oldest teenage daughter is constantly falling into – and then just as quickly out of. This is really infatuation; it has nothing to do with love, just a vague shadow of what real love should be. But, she continues to be unable to understand her emotions are only for a moment, even when they last only for a week or maybe for three months! It is all “love” to her.

Infatuation can be confusing to the young heart, it seems real, and after all, the other person is everything they are looking for (except eligible as a spouse in my eyes!). Luckily, my daughter is not the only one with this problem in our church, I have seen this more and more frequently the last several years and unfortunately leading the two star struck lovers to the altar. I say “unfortunately” because infatuation might be good for three years at the most – and then it is over. You can almost set a clock for when the divorce or separation will occur, it is so predictable. Of course, three years is plenty of time to create a little one in - and now you both have a major complication for the rest of your lives!

For all of the confusion swirling through my daughter’s mind over “love”, infatuation is pretty easy to understand and spot. If everything must be NOW – it is infatuation. If you are “desperately concerned” for the other person, yet all you really seem to care about is yourself, your appearance or your feelings – it is infatuation. If you can’t have a normal conversation without ending up in the sack – it is infatuation. Sorry, if this defines your relationships – you never will find satisfaction nor a long lasting relationship until you can get past you and your own desires – no matter how blind you are to them.

Truth hurts. If you are old enough to think you are in love, you are old enough to handle it.

So, what infatuation is not, is what love is. It is not constrained by time, nothing has to be now, you are satisfied to wait upon the Lord and HIS leading. Your true concern is not how you feel-look-appear, it is what can you do to help the other person without any personal gain (tangible or intangible!). You will be best friends, you will know each other intimately – and that is intimate in non-sexual terms! You will be apart of each other’s lives and each other’s families. That does not mean you will be accepted by the other’s family but you should be available.

Sound idyllic or unimaginable? It shouldn’t be. But, then, maybe you have never known love from your family or friends, maybe everything has been a “using” relationship, in which case, I am sorry for you. I grew up in a very non loving environment as well and had to learn about love from my future spouse. It was hard, they were patient and I have to admit it took me about three years to figure out what love is. Of course, God played a big part in this as well.

Ok, so now we are at the SIBLING point in this blog’s title and though not as catastrophic as infatuation, it can still be a cause of problems. What am I talking about? Well, assuming you are a Christian, you have the Spirit of God in you, whether you recognize this or not. In fact, every Christian has this aspect to them – they are your brothers and sisters.

We can be drawn by the Spirit, in us, to others, due to the Spirit which is in them. The Spirit at least recognizes we are the same – there is an unspoken aspect of commonality. I hear this called “love” or “love at first sight” all of the time. But, random strange attraction really is not love. Love is the product of a relationship and commitment.

How long have you really known this person? How many hours have you spent talking to them? How do they behave around others? Etc. Yah, love at first sight doesn’t work when you start asking the hard questions. But, the infatuated will still try to bluff their way through – because you can’t possibly be right.

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So, what is the point here? The church, which should be setting the standard for what love is, has failed. Our youth, much less many of us, are completely clueless on this issue! It is a task the church must face – to teach ourselves, our children and then the world what real love is.

Defy Hollywood and its culture of death; take back the definition of what love is and end the senseless destruction of the family and mockery we make of ourselves!