Not Insane, Yet

I spent the first half of yesterday just sitting and reviewing 2012.  It takes much thought to reread all of my posting across three blogs (no, this is only one of them) and to evaluate the year.  Interspersed has been a running dialog with my Niece and trying to find out what befell one of "my boys" on Christmas day - he was in ER until quite late last night but no resolution it seems to what brought him to the hospital.

I guess, in my reread, I can sort of understand how so many believe me quite mad.  In this godless culture someone whom "hears" God's voice, has vision of a future that only seems to get worse and worse, and does what is not culturally acceptable within the "polite" church - yeah, they are at least delusional if not outright mad.  And yet, I am not quite insane, yet in any event.  I end the year with at least my Niece still talking to me and deposited with her and Daughter much that is still to come - my vindication if nothing else which can be remembered in past tense if need be.

I struggle so desperately with language, to express what I can barely translate in my mind to English and yet no longer seem to be able to express in my native tongue.  Sigh, I count myself as if a mute at times.....

And across a Christmas Day, which left Niece quite exasperated with my mother and the rest of the family, and me in hidden tears!  Yeah, suddenly she now understands exactly where Kris stands with each member of his family.  I am quite the moron it seems.  One that cooks very well but still a moron none the less.  I am lucky I do not have to wear depends I guess.

In a week, school begins a new for me, as well as the physical loss of my Niece.  School will keep me busy, Niece will be missed greatly, Gaelic Girl will be returning to Texas and there will just be the awkward silence between my two kids still at home and me.....

Still have to write my review for 2012, which honestly I would do well to forget ..... except for this past month - I will always remember it warmly.