Disrespect

Many years ago, a dear sister lived with me for many months while she prepared for surgery.  I loved this woman as my own and had known her for at least a decade by that time.  One day she and her youngest daughter were talking, they did not know I could hear.  I wasn't purposefully listening but I could over hear if I had wanted to.  And it did not matter to me, they were just yakking and suddenly she said something that stuck with me through all of these years.

The mother said, "I just do not understand how he puts up with her, she has no respect for him at all!  She disrespects everything he does ....."

The rest of the conversation fails my memory because I was stunned.  She was talking about Gaelic Girl, it had to be.  Gaelic Girl had no respect for me?  Really? Was she supposed to?  Why would she?  And I have thought on this across the years.

Did I care that GG has no respect for me?  No, not really, I have very little for myself as it is, why should anyone else have any for me?  But, yeah, I did start to notice trends once GG entered the change of life.  Disrespect became the basis of her relationship with me - creating a tangled mess which exists today.

It all began right after I lost my job I had held for 14 years, put out to pasture and abandoned by my company and career long friends.  It was okay with me, I have some royalties income - not much but enough to live on if I have to and not ever go to Starbucks.  But, it apparently bugged her.  I lost most of my real money on a bad property investment and the collapse of the housing market here in the northwest.  Bum luck?  And her opinion of me took a noise dive.  It has since only gotten worse.

Last night, was the worse ever and she lashed out pretty good.  I have not been treated so poorly since I was in high school.  And what do you do with it?  I thought of lashing back, but I do respect the GG I knew before she became this way.  I live in hope that woman will emerge from this hormonal mess she refuses to recognize.....

And now, yes, it does bother me that I am disrespected by those I love and care for.  Her attitude has been adopted by my son and his sneers are about to end his young little view of the world being about him!  Of course, I realize that much is the result of her toxic overload with my daughter earlier this year, still playing out in her head.  The acqusation still there, still unresolved to her satisfaction, she knows Kris is a player and that was not his daughter at all!

It sickens me to live like this.  I pray daily for God's intervention in my daughter's life, her mother's life, GG's life, heck anyone and everyone's! in this soap opera that continues to play out around me, without me.....  And God does show me change, but not the kind I would prefer.  I hate confrontation, I run from it, I soon will have to draw the line in the sand and cause it.  It makes me physically ill.  It is all so avoidable, it is all so senseless, it is all being forced or allowed by God for a purpose I do not understand.....

People being forced to make a decision, based upon pure lies and feeding on hate.  People I have known and loved for decades, climbing over each other to disrespect Kris.  Be it church, family or friends, it is like some Hitchcock horror film, where you know it is a set up, but a set up for what?  And then the guy's head comes off.  Cool, saw that one coming!  Not!

So, I do what I do.  I do what God tells me to do, always have.  I have just never bore a penalty before for my faithfulness.  It appears that is changing in a painful manner.