Curing All Problems

All of us are flawed.  Everyone you hold up on a pedestal as whom you admire, or want to be, is just as flawed - if not so than you are.  Everyone ... means everyone!  Your family, same as you.  Your religious leaders, same as you.  Your politicians, same as you (probably worse than you!).

All of us are flawed and if you join any form of an organization, you are going to take your flaws with you.  Unfortunately, that is especially true of churches.  My church, your church, all churches are teeming with 1000% flawed people.

And flawed people cause nothing but problems with other flawed people ...

Philippians 4:1 - 5

The church in Philippi managed to encounter a run in between two flawed women.  Does not really matter whom they are, they are the same as you and I only the church became embroiled in their fight.

Paul does not tell us what the fight was over, bad coffee choice during fellowship snack time, fighting over how baptisms are done, not being allowed to sing in the choir, etc - ad nausem, as I have encountered through the years in very flawed churches!  And since Paul said nothing as to what the problem was - we can apply his solution to all situations!

All Christians are a part of God's family and we must handle conflict God's way ...

1. Love
If you know Love, if you love, then you will fight less amongst yourselves.

2.  Stand
Stand firm in the Lord and His word in Love, not your opinion.

3.  Plead
Unity is a big deal to God.  We must find a way to get along with one another!  It is important and that lack of our effort is evidenced by the lack of blessings we have from God corporately.

4.  Help
When one fails, we all fail.  When one falls, we all suffer for it.  We are to lift up one another in all regards, without consideration except for our debt to Jesus for what He has done for us.

5. Rejoice
Criticism lives where praise does not - and visa-versa!  So, guard that sharply barged tongue of yours and learn to praise others convincingly in truth!

6.  Calm
Gentileness is needs to be reflected in your attitudes towards others in the church!  It can really make a difference in a family as much as in a church!

The Interview

So, today I turn 59.  I have outlived all previous male members of my mother's family, now by 19 years.  Whom could have thought!  I am the last male left from my father's side as well, as much a woe to my Swiss family as it is to me!  No one, not even my doctors thought I could have lasted this long - their doom and gloom goes back 28 years!  Which just goes to prove my argument through all of these years, God is not quite done with me yet!  And who really needs a liver or kidneys after-all?

I was challenged by one of my readers last year to do a humorous pseudo-interview of myself.  I am sure they have forgotten, until this very moment, and I hope my wit holds out as I do this interview now cold and in one take!  Not sure if I am going to be a smart ass or serious, maybe a combination?  But, what ever it is - it will be a one shot off the cuff, natural Kris!  So, here goes:

What is your idea of perfect happiness?

July in Arizona making crab legs!

Finding Bigfoot, teaching him how to play cards and being accepted into the Bigfoot tribe.

Freedom to just be me, time to relearn what humanity is, absence of all of my constraints.
To know I served my God well.

What is your greatest fear?
Spiders, I hate spiders, I will scream like a three year old girl and "jump" on top of a table if you do not save me!

Which historical figure do you most resemble?
Samuel Richardson, most famous as a Captain in the Texas Volunteer Cavalry, Confederate States of America.  A man whom although having no stake in the situation in America, at the time returned to the land of his birth, served his men and country with distinction then quietly disappeared from public history.

His death in a Union prisoner of war camp was greatly exaggerated.  He went on to live his life, traveled to Oregon, at some point crossing the er, tarnished path of my great-aunt, his stories via her, becoming a part of my own knowledge and character. 

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
Any thing that others can do better than me!

What is the trait you most deplore in others?
Anything they can do better than me!

When and where were you the happiest?
Since most of my life was lived without any such emotion, here are some highlights:
The quiet and solitude of closing down a ski area at -80 degrees.
Summiting Longs Peak at -20, in 60 mph winds.  Cold granite, cold steel, total conquest.
My first car, a 1969 Fiat 124 Spyder body on an Alfa Romero drive train.
Taking an impossible shot and succeeding!
Adopting each one of my children, in court or before God.
When each of my children were able to say "I love you", often not even in words.
The rarity of having a boss say "Well done."
When one of "My Kids", gets it, and suddenly understands.
At the honesty of a moment with no walls, only truth and total commitment.
Knowing I have someone watching my back.

Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
abecedarian, calamanco, morioplasty, worsification and of course, zum!
But, I am trying to cut back on each and everyone of these daily words across this next year!  (yes, those are all real words!)

Which living person do you most despise?
There is no one less qualified to continue living than Ratko Mladić, the murderer of my cousin Bernard, whom was a medic in Bosnia.  Sorry no mercy for a coward whom whom would kill a medic, no mercy for each of the NATO troops whom would withdraw to allow the slaughter of 1,100 women, children, old people and seven NATO medics performing surgery at the time!  No mercy for Ratko from me, but as a Hutterite and a Christian I am required to let him know about God's forgiveness for what he has done - but if he accepts before his well earned execution, do not expect me to even look his way once in Heaven ...  It shames me that I am counted in his number, as no better before my God.

If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what would it be?
A fortune telling machine, where I can give out the real fortunes to the user of the machine.  Usually, the message would read something like: "You are soooooo stupid!".

What do you see as your greatest achievement?
Problem is, all of my greatest achievements have been surpassed by others, now hollow victories no one cares to remember today - I am just a historical relic.  Better technologies, more money, better sponsors, etc.   But, back in the day ...

So, I can then only say that God used me, often in odd ways, to reach His own ... even to others utter amazement.  And it is the Church's condemnation of me that I hold closest to my heart as proof of having done what was right in God's eyes, not what was politically correct in man's.  I did as I was told.

What is the lowest depth of misery for you?
Listening to the ten thousandth person at an antique show telling me all about how their grandparents had boxes full of "these", usually my neanderthal tool collection on display, and how they used to sell them for only a penny a piece.  I was just unaware that neanderthals lived in North America, or perhaps it is just one of their family problems ...

What is your most marked characteristic?
My ability to entertain.  Mind you, the last thing on Earth I want to do but it is the wall I hide behind.  And everyone thinks I am hilarious by nature, no - just a really really really insecure clown.

The real me?  To think through all of the fluff in life which blinds us and to ferret out what the real causes for problems are.  To desire to help my friends overcome their causes ...  Yeah, then that brings up some other problems too.

What do you most value in your friends?
My friends are my family - no hidden warts, everything out in the open - a no holds barred free for all!  And we still respect and love each other.

Who are your heroes in real life?
People, not so unlike Theodore Roosevelt.  Those willing to just stand up and do something to take on the status quo of the day, to set right wrongs in this world.  Of course, as history has shown, the bureaucrats will always destroy what was accomplished for good, in the end.  But, even small gains are better than being ground down without a fight!

How would you like to die?
Peacefully in my sleep, but then I did that one once - there is no such thing!
Kicking, screaming and in a sea of spent brass - but I vowed to God I would never take human life.
Someone unplugging the machine while I am drooling on myself and wondering if I still have toes - that would be okay.

Just nothing as meaningless as being backed over by a bread truck, please!

What is your motto?
Determination and Persistence will always trump Education and Skill.

Making A Difference

Last week was fairly horrible.  I learned a great deal, I learned a great deal about me, I learned a great deal relationally.
Apparently, God felt I had grown enough to take both barrels of a shotgun to the guts, or He was gracious enough provide the body armor needed to not kill me - just my angel.

So, with lots to think on, pray over, remember, analyze, and come to either a prayer list item on, learn from or understand how to clear up miscommunications.  Yeah, it was quite a few days there, the past five years playing a prominent role in this self evaluation.

And today, I thought on this.  What I just went through has not so bad a lesson for each of us to consider this year!

Pray
We each need prayer, all of us, no matter how well you think you have a handle on life!
Our family members need prayer.
Our religious leaders need prayer.
Our civil leaders need prayer.
Our children's teachers need prayer.
Our government leaders need prayer.
All nations need prayer.
We need to pray for a war against Satan and his inroads into our daily lives.  Sorry, I am not talking denominational anything, bad Biblical theology anything!  I am talking a war on the corruption at virtually all levels in our lives!

You literally would not  want to see my prayer list!

Mentor
Not only do we each need mentoring in some capacity, but we also need to mentor others around us.
None of us know it all, if you think you do - guess what!  You are wrong, I have proof.
We need, in varying capacities, interpersonal relationship help, knowledge and application in dealing with God and others.

Swede beats me up regularly concerning interpersonal relationship, Niece has been driving herself crazy helping this mess of a man learn how to be human, Dutchman keeps my feet firmly on the ground and my eyes on the future and not the darkness of the past, and yes, I have those whom I turn to bounce my thoughts on God off of and visa-versa.  I need lots of help it seems day to day, reaching out to become ... ?  Something, when I grow up, I guess.

Encourage
Everyone needs help in most areas of their lives, whether that is physical or financial help, or just a kind word.
The world is full of people willing to kick your teeth in, praise God when you find one whom believes in you, says the kind word, shares a word of wisdom, etc !
Equally, you can easily be that source of encouragement in another's life - especially with youth!  Everyone appreciates an atta-boy, everyone enjoys a smile and a well wish.  Sure there are those whose are beyond encouragement but 99.9% would like a kind word.
As for youth, they have a world of negatives out there, they hear the constant drone of the drum chanting out how stupid, incompetent, etc they are.  Usually it is just their mind set, translating all messages that way. 

So, be the unexpected, do the unexpected, be an encourager.

In Passing

This post brings me no joy.

Father married eight times.  Two of his wives have been favorites of my sister and I.  Gwen, whom I showed you a photo of some time back this summer, and Marge, who I really have no good photo's with.

Marge was wife number eight, one of only two father's age (most of them were my age!).  They had just celebrated their second anniversary when father's body gave out on him.

Now she too has passed away.

It is with sadness I say this as I had been working on a biography for her of my father's life - with the help of my aunts, something to give her on what would have been their wedding anniversary.  And I am at a loss for words.

She had been diagnosed with liver cancer back before Christmas, however she had the will and the money to see a long fight through.  I had no question she was going to make it.  My children, whom also knew her and stayed in contact with her are equally stunned.

When last we spoke, at Christmas, she was bright and chipper.  Everyone thought, "All is well."

And so the first death of someone I cared for, with this new nature fully in control.  I barely survived Edvard's death in March - it was only my ability to temporarily shut down that I did make it; I am now without a reaction.  I have no words, no witticisms, nothing with which to deflect this pain.  A dear lady in my life has died and I am left defenseless against emotion.

All prayers appreciated for her families, all of whom need to make their peace with their creator ...

Musical Saturday Morning

It was the fall of 1973, I had just become a Christian, and not having much time for radio listening back then - I managed to listen to this piece of music just by chance while hitch-hiking from from Tacoma up I-5 to Kent.  It captivated me and I had no clue why ...

Historical Secrets

It did not take much to establish who his real family was, they actually had set out to find me.  He was believed to have been dead by then, so they were looking for me.  His mother had died and her estate needed settled.  My response was one of overjoy at having found them!  And, since they had loved and cared for their parents, anything of value was theirs.  I only wanted copies of photographs and to learn to know them.

And across the years we have a fairly close relationship.  I am happy.

But, in my readings this week, I suddenly found myself choking on what I was finding!  It was a British book I had picked up, just never read.  It was a hard week, I needed rest and a book would be good - especially one that deals in conspiracy, government cover-ups and of course space aliens!  What more could one ask for relaxation.

I expected humorous readings, something so easy to laugh off that Dutchman and Swede would be jumping up and down to read it next!

Instead, I found my father.

Oh make no mistake, he is whom I found him out to be, there is just a problem with his story - I had assumed a piece of information as to the project he had worked on.  Yeah, I had the designations right, I just did not know there were three V-3 projects.  Father had a great love for rockets, so I had assumed that must have been the V-3 he was on, and he did have extraordinary knowledge of that project.

However, he also had knowledge of another V-3 project, one which probably outside of this British book has not been documented well.

And as the story reads on, places come up which father had a strong knowledge of and I have to admit I wondered at how since I knew he was the Swiss guy and his WWII stations were in the north not central areas.  Then the list of names started ticking off of my sister and I's list - I knew almost all of them.  Some were decades old family friends even! 

And I was given reason to now pause.

No wonder my simple questions had caused an NSA uproar, father beyond having been a Paperclip Scientist and US citizen, was involved in some German programs so secret that there is virtually nothing known about their programs even to this day.  The paperwork disappeared, the physical items built can not be found, we are talking Black Box here.  Shut, silent, sealed.

Then I finished the book.  I realized that the man was not a crackpot!  His story all too possible and true - he named names, backed up with copies of records from the Russians: dates, places, even the question of what was going on in America was stressed.  He nibbled the edges, my father had lived it.

I was stunned.  Were my father still alive I would be in Denver right now kicking his butt until I got some truth out of him.  Yeah, I know understand what the Germans had been up to, I understand why they had needed my father's brain so badly, I can even understand how a youth could have been lured into the field of theoretically research on time, gravity and the folding of both of them.  But, like me the author also hit a brick wall at the US shores, all stories dead ended once the US military becomes involved.  Almost all of my father's friends are now dead, the projects' knowledge lost in so far as availability is concerned, end of story.

And I sit here and remember those early years of mine, father's long absences, his letters from locations now I know associated with the US pursuit of what the German's had failed to succeed at.  Then I looked at my work career and I realize now how silently I had been moved around to work on projects far advanced from what father had worked on - yet we shared the same goal in our work, in fact the same project!  And now I realize at how the bean counters in charge of the black box have failed - they observed the trick of physic we used, but still do not understand that this is a side effect - there is much more involved then they allow for in science.

I knew at the time this was a side effect, but none of us understood - of what?

I am stunned.  The potential of what we did could change aerodynamics for real, not as a magic trick because of the side effect we utilized buy on a larger scale - the creation of energy for transportation.  How we failed to even understand what we were doing amazes me ...

Digging In Historical Secrets

My adventure to find out whom my father really was/is began in 1984.  I was moving and had some old boxes I had never been through and honestly I thought of just throwing them await.  A letter fell out of the bottom of one of them and it was from my father's mother.  I was stunned.  She was dead, how could she have written?  Then I saw that it was dated 1968, it was a birthday card for my 13th birthday and my father had thrown it away, but it seems mother had saved it secretly, she just never thought I would find it.

I wrote a letter to my unknown grandmother, and nothing ...
So, I talked with my sister and we wrote out everything we knew about our father, every story, every piece of a comment we could remember.  And and then I set out to sequence and locate the history behind those stories.
I filed with the US Immigration and Naturalization Service for a copy of father's original paperwork.
I wrote the Red Cross in Germany, asking for their help and verifying his stories about being from what is now Poland.
I wrote the Canadian and British War Time Archivists for copies of manifests for the camp father had said he was held in after the war.

It was all I could do, the internet did not exist as a tool to search for such information back then.  And, I waited.

The US Immigration and Naturalization Service responded almost instantly with a letter refusing me access to his paperwork and suggesting that any further attempts would result in my US citizenship being revoked.

For one and a half years my phone was tapped, my mail searched, we found a listening device had been drilled into the side of my new house!  A major storm had ripped off the bad job of covering it up.

I went to the police and the Postal Inspector, showed them what I had and they both commented I had apparently pissed off someone in spy land.

I received calls from both of my parents, they had been "visited" and interviewed by the US NSA, first I had ever heard of them!  Mother thought it funny, father was furious.

The Canadians and British politely declined to provide the requested information, but did offer to allow me to search their records personally after 20 more years had passed.

The Red Cross provided me with all I needed to know that father was not from what is now Poland.

My letter to my grandmother was returned; no such person or address.

I received a letter from the Swiss government offering  to meet with me, as they too had a strong interest in finding my father.  And, they learned that one how?

 I sat and review what I knew: father was not whom he claimed to be, the Swiss tale appeared to be a dead end and something in the spy community had been awakened by simple questions. 

My conclusion?  Father was a Russian mole - and I became very quiet on the subject.

But, there was a problem with the Swiss dead end, I had a picture of his sister, and she was a dead ringer for my sister facially.  Interesting.