Bummer

The time has come to give an early good-bye - but not at this exact moment in time.  No, not by choice but read along and you will understand.

When I was 32, minus one day, I suffered a heart attack and my heart stopped.  As I lay there in bed, with incredible pain mind you, I wondered - so this is it?  I had expected to make it to 40 like most men in my family, but alas, 32 is better than nothing.  So, I am waiting what seems an eternity and nothing is happening.  So, I figured I should just go out praying and so I started praying for all of my friends and family.

Eventually, I heard a voice say, "You have lived your life so far by your rules, now you will live them by mine."

Then I felt a hand squeeze my heart three times and the sound of the blood flow echoing in my ears returned.  No this was no some real demented dream.  This was Kris dying and God saying my days were now His.

I spent three days in bed recovering from this experience.  This was not fun physically, mental, emotionally nor spiritually! But when I could get up, I understood that people where the only investment in life with any value.  And, I completely changed the direction of my life at that point.

This why I have often done the things I have done - I have been on borrowed time for the past 23 years.  When you understand your mortality it does not matter what happens, but it does matter what you are doing.  And God has had many corrections along the way for me to accomplish whatever was His tasks.

Why do I bring this up?  Well, you might have noticed I started a series about my friend Spook and there was a break in posting there.  Not because I was busy but because I was shaken once again by my mortality.

It seems some of my organs are beginning to fail.  And I am not real thrilled about this.  I sort of had looked forward to seeing my great-grandchildren, but God, if He desires, may have other plans.  For now, my body is running only at 10% of function.  Not a real pleasant fact - because it means I am slowly poisoning myself to death.  Yeah, they can take care of some of this through dialysis, but not everything.  Sigh.

Right now I am getting my stuff ready to sell.  Who knows, maybe that money will help with hospital or other costs.  I will be looking for a job in the Seattle area in earnest to get some money coming in as well.  (But first, I need to see what is left of the family and my friends of a lifetime.)

So, I wanted to take the time to say any extended break in posting will mean that Kris has gone on home and will be waiting there to meet you there!  To say thanks for the many years of laughter and prayers and sharing in each other's lives.  I have no idea what the Lord has planned for me now or even if I have 40 days, much less, 40 years before I go - but the doctor is stressed enough to tell me it is not well without a miracle.  And I have had several miracles in my life - so who knows?  Not I.

Next up, a January filled with an awful lot of needles.  And, I am a self confessed needle wimp.....