Family Obligations

Another reply to a teenage young woman….

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When I was a new Christian, I discovered a guy named Bill Gothard whom gave presentations on Basic Life Principles.  It was geared towards youth and I found his teachings to be appalling.  Basically, he believes in a tiered authority structure, of which you are always on the bottom tier.  It made no difference to him whether your family was Christian or not, you were forever under their authority.  Admittedly, I never could see myself under my godless father’s authority – for he lacks all wisdom which could have come from God.  A brilliant man, completely and totally blind to all truth.

We had long fights over this at my Bible School, for weeks.  In the end, I think everyone recognized the foolishness of an adult being under the authority of a non-Christian.  But, if your father was a Christian, then maybe yes, you ought to at least listen and pray about what he says.

 Certainly, you are under the authority of the home you live in and need to live in peace within that home, whether your authority is Christian or not.  Of course, I am assuming there is no conflict here with laws or God’s leading, which adds another dimension that needs to be addressed if it ever comes up, as a separate issue.

But reality always gets in the way, when it should not.  What are you to do?

Well, for one, be in prayer for those whom are in authority over you.  That your father will choose wisely.  That he will find his peace with his creator.  That your mother will be respectful and supportive of your father.  That anyone else in your authority structure will be supportive of you and clear in their walk with the Lord.

May come a day when your father will come to Christ, through the example of the lives he observes, not through words or preaching – but by having seen a Christian life lived through you.

Many years ago, realizing I lacked knowledge of a Christian home, I adopted an older Christian couple, whom I consider my ‘Christian’ father and mother.  I have used them numerous times, calling upon their wisdom when I am at wits end over some issue or another – mostly children related.  They have been a real blessing for 25 years now.

As far as honoring your father – the best advice I can give is to live your life as a Christian and make yourself the best person you can be – not a reflection of your father’s life as it is today.  Let him learn to take pride in your witness though he may not understand what makes you a ‘golden child’.