You and Your Tongue

James so elegantly, so simply, tells of the power of the tongue.  Its power to destroy is probably easily known in all of our lives!  See James 3:1-12...

But the Bible has much more to say on this subject!  Solomon apparently had learned or observed many important lessons associated with opening your mouth.  So, grab your Bible, open it up to the book of Proverbs and think on what you have been told about the tongue of yours:

Consider not saying anything at all!
Proverbs 10:19, 10:21, 16:28, 17:9, 17:27-28

You do not need to say everything you know!
You do not have to say everything you think!
You do not have to repeat everything you hear!

Though with caution, as requesting prayer from those  you trust is very important to your life and walk!

Consider whether or not you actually know all of the facts!
Proverbs 14:3, 17:27, 18:13

Even if you are talking with an original source you have to stop and ask yourself if there is an agenda being run.  And as these last two years have shown me - a liar is going to lie, even when confronted!  You have to be careful in your sources.  The ability to use discernment can be very powerful in cutting through the personalities, agendas and emotions to find out what really is going on.

Consider the best way to say what needs to be said.
Proverbs 10:19, 12:25, 13:3, 15:1, 15:4, 15:23, 16:24, 18:21

There are lots of ways of saying the same things, without baiting the listener, without provoking a defensive or offensive reaction and without using weasel words!

Hence, the need to engage brain - before engaging mouth!

Fully Aware

God had warned me what last week was going to be like, so I pre-wrote the posts for the entire week.  I knew I would be unable gather my thoughts.  I had a pretty good idea what was coming and prepared to be betrayed - there was just no way I could have suspected how it was to play out and that poor battered single emotion took the hit like a bullet to the brain.  Oh God last week was bad.  And I so need my friend but alas that was not to be possible.

So pastor, bless his dear heart, decided to tell Gaelic Girl the substance of my 5th pastoral review.  Thank you for the integrity you have shown there guy!  No he still does not believe the tale but he thought it important she know what the gossip was.  As I have commented before, man's logic - not God's wisdom again played out by him.  Interestingly, his story ended far different than reality was.  So different that I had to wonder if he had become confused or if the head of the elder board decided to ad lib my rebuke for insisting on continuing to pray for my estranged daughter.  Very interesting and honestly, I don't care anymore.

Given ammunition, GG was all over me for 3 days straight, when she was home.  It was ugly, uglier than anything I have ever experienced in my life and God would not allow my walls up.  Apparently, Kris had to learn about emotional pain.

Her complaints are like shaving cream, but I was right, this all dated back to the fall of 2009 and winter of 2010, when Lucinda was staying with me.  She was angered that I would allow Lucinda to help clean in the kitchen, prepare meals, etc.  To me it was not like anyone else was going to help!  And help is always appreciated.  But, GG can not understand that.  New Daughter doing much the same in the winter of 2012 was the end of all to GG.  The final betrayal.  The end of trust.

My fault was not understanding and already knowing she was leaving our life of ministry we had shared for 35 years.  And so on February 24th I can mark the notch of the end of the longest friendship in my life.  It is with great remorse for I had hoped that she would return to whom she was, but that is not reality it seems.  I also got uninvited to her next therapy session today.  To bad, I could given that lady an earful!

And so, I was forced to implement what I had promised my new friend I would do, I just did not understand how soon it would be!  I expected months, I got one week.  So, left footed, I have begun the transition to a new path, as the old one grows narrow and comes to an end.  And that new path - I really know nothing of.  Starting afresh is so very, very odd.

I no longer know if my daughter's return is on this path, that trip to the southern hemisphere I actually relish, or ?????  I know nothing at this point other than I am going to need time to heal. 

Your prayers are sought.

Loss of a Friend

Where evil reigns, there can be no innocence.  There is only to be found the sounds of the damaged, consumed by the evil which has overcome them.

Yeah, it was quite a holiday yesterday.....

So, Gaelic Girl asked me to go with her to see her therapist, I figured maybe the therapist wanted an outside opinion or observation, boy was I ever wrong!

Straight out of the box it started off with a tag team event, Kris vs Them, a one bout round over Yesfir - which rather quickly degraded.

So, roll the clock back to 2010 and I am not so sure that I ever told the tale of helping a woman by the name of Lucinda.  She had cancer, was dying and needed surgery but was too weak for it.  So, I took her on and cooked my little heart out making that woman gain weight, start doing some walking and getting her physically, mentally and emotionally able to take the surgery.  At the end of six months she had done this and then moved in with her daughter across the country following the surgery.  Apparently, I an suspected of having had an affair with this woman by GG!

I can guaranteed you that Kris has never had an affair, ever.

And it continued with GG in full paranoia mode of my list of conquests.  I was sickened.  Apparently, Kris has never done anything which was not sexually motivated.  In GG's mind I am my father.  I never would have guessed that GG's mind had degraded to such a level.  Nothing in trust, nothing in transparency, nothing in love, nothing in truth, nothing remains of the woman whom has spent decades in the ministry with me.  What I thought were aberrational years, that she would get over, instead were the end of the friendship.

The final comment from her I can remember was that she was going to go the pastor to hear what really went on during my last pastoral review.....

I held my calm through all of the attacks which continued until almost midnight, when sleep made my ears shut to the words of acid being poured over me.

Today, with shock, I get to try and figure out how to mitigate life with this new knowledge.  You see, it never was about Lucinda or Yesfir, at one point in her rage she even said it was over my financial condition for the past three years.  In her mind, that appears to have been God's judgement on me and all of which has followed in her mind only validates my sinful state ......

Red Rage

So, for the second time since I have known Gaelic Girl, I have stood up to her.  Coincidentally, it is also the second time this year.  Not exactly her best year it seems - where I am concerned.

So Saturday became a nuclear explosion.


Daughter remembers painfully the first time I stood up to Gaelic Girl and the disasters which followed.  So, now it is round two.  Welcome to the zombie apocalypse at my house.  Well, her house, but needless to say, apocalypse none the same.  Yeah.

I finally was able to get the center of her problem, Daughter's gift of gossip deposited at the church, Satan's hope of destroying me within the church.  Very disappointing this ever happened.  But, I know my innocence of what what said.  I know my innocence before the Lord.  Of course, everyone else just loves it and is confused as to why I am not squirming.  Because I am innocent.  It is really  simple.

So, for the third time, last night I stood up to GG again, this year and in her life.  I will not be held accountable to the lying tongue of Satan in using my daughter.  Yeah, she knew what she was doing.  The REAL God will hold her accountable and the price of her reconciliation only grows with each passing month of her rebellion.  It is going to hurt and I will suffer for my daughter's sake.

So I have a full day of cooking to prepare for tonight's feast and work around a 4 pm church service.

Take care dear reader and consider why I continually am now referring to the REAL God and not the western cultures god of convenience.  It is worth your effort to discover as I have this year, whom God really is.

Reversal

I always find church to be interesting. It is almost as good as going to the airport in the good old days and just people watching. Fascinating!

So, pre-betrayal by daughter: pastor overtly friendly, most people would say hi.
Then,post-betrayal: pastor runs away, women are avoiding, gossip evident.
Now, post-charge review: pastor said hi but would not shake hand, original gossiper came up and said hi.

Hmmmmm. So, Kris cleared of charges and pastor is still distancing himself and the gall of the gossiper to talk to me, wow! So to translate this: God's representative in the church is having a hard time of a reviewed and cleared Kris, Satan's representative is being friendly.

Now that is one major reversal across just one week! Absolutely no idea what this means but it will take some thinking on this.

Daughter managed two more digs at my heart today as well. Things she did earlier but I did not know about until today. I would email, but why bother? She just gets mad at me, my blood pressure go up, so no good comes from it. I am exhausted of this monkey warfare on her part. For me, I will just take it to God and let Him deal with it in her......

Sunday, I learned that my prayers are being dealt with by God. I am sorry for what happened to her, I had tried to warn her via this blog but who knows if she still reads, much less listens. Her eyes are closed, her ears are sealed, her heart is bound. But, today that darn emotion had to go off and God told me to immediate begin praying for her safety. So, I did, unfortunately in the middle of Spiderman I was attending. Eventually, I apparently said the "right" thing and the overwhelming presence of urgency subsided and I could get back to the film. Maybe this week someone will let me know what happened.

So, I will continue the spiritual warfare for the life of my daughter, until there is no breath left in me. Then, the task will belong to those of my readers whom God will raise up (if not already) to continue to her dying breath to free her from Satan's clutches. And as last night was to turn out, I was up since 2am in spiritual warfare for her for five straight hours! And I have a renewed sense of duty as I now know what my impressions are real, and God is working her over! May it be so, until she ceases her rebellion and is back with this father - ready to study for real.....

Yawn!

Satan Continues the Attack

So, it seems Satan is not done with me yet and continues his attack against me! Yeah, as if this is not already the worst year of my life, no he has now used my estranged daughter to attack from within my church.

The day after she had ducked having to talk with me four times, since our paths kept crossing, and the day before she left with her mother to return home - she filed formal charges against me with one of the pastors. Yeah. I only just heard about this, this morning and so get to meet with the pastor this afternoon to discuss whether or not I should continue to teach any of the Sunday Schools. Yeah.

Thirty-eight years ago I began teaching high schoolers, teaching is decidedly one of my gifts and because of estranged daughter - well yeah.....

So, already the worse year of my life, my estranged daughter whom I still love as such - and am not being freed of by God - has gone for the gold ring it seems. Her gossip and slander campaign began at the beginning of this month, resulting in a host of unfriendings and blockings on FaceBook by women in the church, people avoiding me at services, ETC!

Yeah, I know it is not personal, I know that it is really Satan using my daughter against me. He was able to turn that fresh Christian baby to do his bidding. You probably have no idea the sorrow this brings me. How can I free her when her mother is empowering her in this rebellion? My only weapon left is prayer and lots of it!

She desperately needs your intercessory prayers..... Yeah, she is my daughter.

So, meeting over. Net result is that daughter is in need of a tremendous amount of prayer. And I have more praying now than before for her.

That is how my God works.....

Spiritual Parentage

I know I have posted on this concept before, that we are both the products of our physical families as well as those whom brought us to Jesus for salvation (and hopefully discipled us!).  And in reading John 8:38-42 I find myself drawn back into this idea.  Plus once again thinking on my kids, their birth families, their orphanage families and then my family.  Whole lot of families for those poor rascals!  And families can cause a whole lot of trauma.

In this confrontation between Jesus and Jewish leaders, He shows that it is not just your physical family that is important - your spiritual family is also, if not more so!  The Jews confronting him took pride in knowing their father was Abraham!  Jesus' repsonse points out to them that linage is not just physical, it is also spiritual.  They did not possess Abraham's soul or faith.

Linage is not equal to Linkage
Motion is not equal to relationship

It is more than genetics.  My mother's female line is all Hebrew as far back as there are records.  But that did not make her a Jew, she was an atheist, as was her mother, of course great-grandmother was known to be a Jew and persecuted as such in Russia.  Hence, she became a 'Norwegian' and married a Scottish pastor.....

It is more than tradition, special prayers, attending every service, paying your tithe and keeping yourself outwardly spotless.  It is about a relationship with God and here is where the Jewish leadership failed.  They could put on a great show, but in their hearts they were all for themselves and filled with pride.

Our faith is to have feet.  Think of Abraham packing up the kit and caboodle in Ur and setting off for some distant land.  If you know your Abraham, you know that he made some mighty poor choices along the way - but his heart was sold out to God.  He followed in FAITH but the pharisees wanted to kill Jesus.  A true Jew would have lived as their father (Abraham) had - not by the corruption of this world.

Think of Galatians 5 - "walk by the Spirit, not by the flesh"
Every moment matters
Every moment is a witness whether you want it to be or not!

Father's are forever.  The old rumor mill (v41) had it that Jesus' birth was a little suspicious.  Obviously everyone knew that Joseph had not touched his fiancee, but no one had that faith in the young (teenage) Mary.  So to them, they insinuate he is without a father.

I love verse 42, both are like their fathers - one of God (Jesus), one not (the pharisees).

I always enjoy a good put down and I imagine that the pharisees were ripping their tunics over that one!  Nothing like telling someone they are the son of a motherless goat.....

:^)

Jesus Is The Focus

Continuing thoughts on John 8:1-11.  Last week I shared how the local pastor smacked down the congregation for their judgement and condemnation of last year's Runaway Bride, whom was visiting me and is now in hiding.

His idea was that when "sinners" cross our path we are to be like Jesus was with the woman "caught in adultery".

1.  Make your life about pardon, not punishment!
When you fail, do you need punishment or pardon - not only from God but your peers as well?
Do not seek to condemn others, treat everyone as persons and not pawns to make yourself appear or feel better!
Take the attention off of those in sin, focus yourself and them on the cross.

2.  Point to the cross!
Jesus went to the cross for a reason - our sins separating us from God.  His death bought our forgiveness and completed the promise (covenant) made between Abraham and God - oh so long ago!

3.  Be a safe place for sinners!
The wages of sin is death.  It is not a time out, a broken down car or a tooth cavity!
We each deserve death for our willingness to sin.
Just as you have found forgiveness in Jesus - show those in sin the way to the cross!


In my dealings with RB, I have been on my guard to not condemn her for what she has done.  She knows she has failed mightily - herself, her family, her husband, her faith.  She fears the same may hold true for her new husband and his family.  Her separation from her family is more or less a given.  My place is to continue to love her, even in her sin and show her once again Jesus and the cross.

And of interest was her parents being at this church this morning.  She obviously in shock, but her parents' faces told me the message - their daughter was forgiven and very much loved.  I should also mention that the parents brought first husband with them!

So I close this tale with the knowledge her family is reconciled, she is returning with her parents to reunite with her current husband and Tuesday will probably be the last I see of her.  Equally as important in this story, she and her abandoned husband have come to terms of some sort.  Probably as much for her mental health as his.  But, no he was not seated with them.

Praise God from whom all blessings flow.....

Throwing Stones

So, to continue the story:

Runaway Bride has been at my church several times.  With me on my visits over here in 2010, before she suddenly left for Ohio, and for the past two weeks.  Just her presence has created quite a scandal!  And how people love to talk!

Of course, GOSSIP is wrong in the first place and thoroughly condemned by Paul!  And thinking on it, most of the problems I have found in ALL churches I have attended is the problem of gossip and the other is tolerating open sin in the Body.  But, these we will ignore at this time.....

Since I am not a part of the "In Crowd", I am not privy to most of what goes on.  Certainly, I have been aware of RB's discomfort at Church, which I wrote off as being her discomfort with her own situation.  But, I could be wrong.

It seems that there has been quite an uproar at her reappearance, and with me!, by those whom are ignorant of almost any knowledge.  And the pastor opened up Sunday morning with a shotgun blast into the congregation, then moved on to smack those still left standing!  Wow.

From John 8:1-11, has now spurred the hanging of a sign which reads: "This Is A No Rock Throwing Zone / Policy Strictly Enforced!".  And as for the shotgun blast:

1.  Treat All People As Persons, Not Pawns!
Pawns are viewed as being expendable and of little value.  People are important enough that Jesus chose to die for them.  You are a Person, just like those seated next to you!

This woman, caught in adultery and brought before Jesus, was being used as nothing more than a pawn to get to Jesus.  Those gathered had already broken the Law by not bringing forward the man whom had been with this woman.  She was just a pawn in their game.

We must treat people the way God does, as Persons.

2.  Put Down Your Stones!
We do not have to be the ones throwing stones!  We can choose not to, especially in light of others whom are more than willing to throw them at us!  Even if others are gathering stones, we DO NOT have to.....!

*****

Oh yeah, RB fled! and I have not seen her since 10 am Sunday morning.  She knew the sermon was a whack at those gossiping about her - but she also knew that the passage was about her as well.

So, been trying to find where she is now hiding, in hopes of continuing to be able to reach out to her.....